The Next Kennedy (Kathleen Kennedy Townsend)

The Weekly Standard ^ | 08/05/2002 | Matt Labash

[PJ-Comix]

Though I'd been warned repeatedly that Townsend avoids protracted sit-downs with reporters, she readily agrees to have dinner with me and one of her aides.

Don't even think of having a Big Mac with KKT without having one of her handlers present to make sure she doesn't confuse the mustard with the ketchup when you make a condiment request of her.

[PJ-Comix]

"He must have something to worry about," she says. "I'll just say there's plenty in his record for anyone to explore."

Translation: "Have no fear, I'll trump up the racist charge as soon as my handler tells me what 'trump' means. Does that have something to do with The Donald?"

[PJ-Comix]

She reads quite a bit...

Yes, but do coloring books really count?

[SauronOfMordor]

Kathleen Kennedy Townsend

[PJ-Comix]

She reads quite a bit, and did not like her latest political biography. She won't allow me to print the title or author. It wouldn't be nice. But the reason she disliked it, she says, is it's too sterile, too clean. "There is ambiguity in all great people," she says.

I love that little touch of humility there.

[PJ-Comix]

"It makes for a more interesting biography. It shows a struggle. It makes you understand what life entails."

Okay, I volunteer to do an in-depth rewrite of Kathleen's bio. Here goes:

See Kathleen Run. Run! Run! Run!

See Kathleen Fall. Fall! Fall! Fall!

The End

[SauronOfMordor]

If there is any family in this country least deserving of the title of American royalty, it is this swarm of Back Bay buccaneers.

what is royalty, other than descendents of armed thugs who've learned some manners?

In the middle ages, a man who commanded 10 robbing thugs was called a brigand, but one who commanded a thousand robbing thugs was called a Duke

[PJ-Comix]

"I'm pretty hardboiled. But I don't think she's faking it," he says. "The rest of them are faking it. She's not...."

I agree. Kathleen's not pretending to be a dunce. She really IS one.

[PJ-Comix]

"She's going to be out there naked...."

Great campaign quote. But where are the pics?

[governsleastgovernsbest]

Little known fact: 14 of the 19 hijackers worked as assistant night managers at 7-11s.

[PJ-Comix]

Little known fact: 14 of the 19 hijackers worked as assistant night managers at 7-11s.

Was Apu a terrorist?

[Fintan]

After her introduction, Sheen takes the stage. He talks to the amateur thespians gathered at his feet about their "craft," trying awkwardly to speak their language: Shakespeare, he says, "is like the rap of its day."

Marty back on the sauce?

[IronJack]

one who commanded a thousand robbing thugs was called a Duke

If he's a drunken lace-chaser besides, he's called a Kennedy.

[staytrue]

ping

[Lil'freeper]

You're the best- thanks!

[bleudevil]

I wondered if anybody else caught that. :-> "Shakespeare is like rap" - sounds like a naive student teacher in an "After-school Special" TV show.

[Fintan]

I wondered if anybody else caught that. :-> "Shakespeare is like rap" - sounds like a naive student teacher in an "After-school Special" TV show.

Think that's bad? Watch "The Lifetime Channel" sometime. Doesn't matter when or where.

After five minutes of whatever those folks call "entertainment" you;ll be heading for the toilet.