[discostu]

If Mom feels like this could happen,

Most people don't think their spouse is gonna screw 'em over. If they do usually they leave first.

Why would any woman have kids with this kind of guy?

Because she's stupid. Seen it more times than I'd care to admit. None of this has bearing on the root question.

If she does, it's her problem just as much as his. And, yes, he should still get custody of the son. But in this case, he wouldn't want the son anyway, so would probably be willing to give him up.

But now you have an exception. It's not all being handled the same way. That was your goal, universal divorce handling, no power for the courts.

If a parent has been convicted of a crime in a court of law, they would forfeit their rights to custody.

You can be a crackhead and not get convicted. But again, we're introducing exceptions here.

I did not say that either parent should be cut off from any kids, just that custody would be to one or the other.

You said more than that. You also included no visitation and no child support. That's a complete severing of the relationship in my book.

By doing this you would have the best chance in forcing both parents to behave like adults and share the kids. But there would be not time/money issues that could/would be used as bargaining chips and extortion leverage.

How could mandated single parent custody with no visitation or child suport result in sharing of the kid? Your outline is the exact opposite of sharing the kid.

In a divorce, this usually happens to everyone anyway. And this continues to happen even after the divorce. My solution would actually help put a limit on how much of this could continue happening. Like I said before, divorce should be cruel, harsh, cold, and businesslike. Maybe then people would think at least twice before making a marriage commitment and then pulling the plug a few years later.

Please. Spoken like someone seeking revenge. Divorces aren't all nasty, your system would force the occasional amicable divorce to be a war. That's stupid. If the couple can figure something out on their own then that's the plan that should be used. If the couple can't that's when the courts should step in and sort the mess out. That's what courts are actually supposed to be for, sorting out messes. At that point the courts have to take in the whole situation and react accordingly.

[DennisR]

"You said more than that. You also included no visitation and no child support. That's a complete severing of the relationship in my book."

That is a possibility. However, is it not generally true that divorced parents want their children to see the other parent? This would force the parents--without government and the courts externally mandating it--to act like adults. If they choose not to do that, it is not the end of the world. Besides, any attempt to make divorce reach some type of Utopian goal is ill-fated. To clarify, there would be no court-ordered visitation. Obviously, if the parent wants to have the child visit the other parent, there would be nothing preventing that. And I believe that would be the case in most situations.

"Please. Spoken like someone seeking revenge. Divorces aren't all nasty, your system would force the occasional amicable divorce to be a war. That's stupid. If the couple can figure something out on their own then that's the plan that should be used. If the couple can't that's when the courts should step in and sort the mess out. That's what courts are actually supposed to be for, sorting out messes. At that point the courts have to take in the whole situation and react accordingly."

In short, courts are oftentimes used to screw at least one of the parties. (Especially since there are so many liberal judges who use it to force their political/social/economic agendas down the throats of "the little peoople.") I know of too many cases that did exactly that.

I am not seeking revenge--I am just saying that all emotion and court-mandated arrangements should be absent if not eliminated altogether. Otherwise, you will generally end up with at least one party being very bitter about things because they got the raw end of the deal. Yes, there are (apparently) amicable divorces, but they are the exception rather than the rule. In fact, I know no one who has been involved in an amicable divorce.