Posted on 06/15/2002 4:16:21 PM PDT by Texaggie79
EWN EXCLUSIVE |
NORCO Riverside County sheriff's deputies raided a golf tournament Friday where participants were allegedly offered prostitutes, authorities said. "They were having a private golf tournament," said Deputy Lisa McConnell said. "Illegal acts of sex for money was offered during the tournament."
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Best Ball?
Which hole offered a 'closest to the hole' prize?
Longest drive?
Did the longest drive win provided it was the straightest and true?
How were lateral hazards scored?
Were the deputies simply marking 'out-of-bounds' play?
And how about the effecting of handicap?
Each player shall furnish his own equipment for play, normally one club and two balls.
Play on course must be approved by the owner of the hole.
Unlike outdoor golf, the object is to get the club in the hole and keep the balls out
For most effective play, the club should have a firm shaft. Course owners are permitted to check shaft stiffness before play begins.
Course owners reserve the right to restrict club length to avoid damage to the hole.
Object of the game is to take as many strokes as necessary until the owner is satisfied play is complete. Failure to do so may result in being denied permission to play again.
It is considered bad form to begin playing the hole immediately upon arrival. Experienced players will normally take time to admire the entire course, paying special attention to well formed mounds and bunkers.
Players are cautioned not to mention other courses they have played or are currently playing to the owner of the course being played. Upset owners have been known to damage a players equipment for this reason.
Players are encouraged to have proper rain gear, just in case.
Players should not assume that the course is in shape to play at all times. Players may be embarrassed if they find the course temporarily under repair. Players are advised to be extremely tactful in this situation. More advanced players will find alternate means of play when this is the case.
Players should assume their match has been properly scheduled particularly when playing a new course for the 1st time. Previous players have been known to become irate if they discover someone else is playing what they considered a private course.
The owner of the course is responsible for the pruning of any bushes, which may reduce the visibility of the hole.
Players are strongly advised to get the owners permission before attempting to play the backside.
Slow play is encouraged, however, players should be prepared to proceed at a quicker pace at the owners request.
It is considered an outstanding performance, time permitting, to play the same hole several times in one match.
I had about four jokes I thought of....none of which would fit the high morality bar of the Free Republic.
So....I found this one....
..........
A young woman had been taking golf lessons. She had just started playing her first round of golf when she suffered a bee sting. The pain was so intense that she decided to return to the clubhouse.
Her golf pro saw her come into the clubhouse and asked, "why back so early?
"Whats wrong?"
"I was stung by a bee."
"Where?" he asked.
"Between the first and second hole", she replied. He nodded knowingly and said, "Then your stance is too wide."
Starting on the irons and working into the "woods" [or tents in this case]
PPPPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTT!!!
Too wide indeed!
BTW: you do know that yelling "FOUR!" on a golf course isn't an invitation to fourplay, right?
(bad, I know, but someone had to do it!)
Spelling error corrected ;)
And shortly after a player entered the tent would he be "one up" on his partners?
Perhaps could you mean "green knees fees"?
Only if said player pitched said tent, I daresay ...
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