Posted on 06/10/2002 4:35:38 AM PDT by Pern
Isolated incidents of oral sex on campus and talk among middle-school students of the behavior occurring at off-campus parties has alarmed some Fayette County school administrators and parents who plan meetings on the topic.
Physicians, including one who has seen an increase in sexually transmitted diseases among middle school students, and other professionals are promoting frank discussions about oral sex to discourage students from engaging in it. Still, all agree the practice is limited to a small number of students, some of whom do not equate oral sex to intercourse.
Since Beaumont Middle School principal Tom Mowery wrote to parents in December asking them "to be aware of the prevalence of oral sex at off-campus parties at the middle-school level," administrators at one school referred an incident to law enforcement, and administrators at another school, Jessie Clark Middle, called in parents to discuss a situation.
Diane Woods, the district's middle school director, put the topic on the agenda for a future principals meeting. She said she was notified of a report of oral sex occurring between two students on campus at Tates Creek Middle School several weeks ago.
Without releasing specifics, Tates Creek Middle School assistant principal Earl Stivers said the incident was investigated "both by law enforcement and administratively."
Students' remarks have made doctors and parents fear the activity is more widespread.
Dr. Hatim Omar, a University of Kentucky specialist in adolescent medicine, said that just since January, he has treated at least 10 middle school-age students for sexually transmitted diseases they said they had contracted through oral sex. That's up from six cases in 2001 and two each in 1999 and 2000.
Four students, treated for tonsillitis caused by gonorrhea, attributed their conditions to so-called "head parties," Omar said.
Also since January, he has seen students from every middle school in Fayette County who admit that they have engaged in oral sex or attended parties where students have engaged in oral sex.
Parents and administrators are responding. Besides principals addressing the topic, Beaumont PTA president Debbie Boian wants middle school PTA leaders to discuss developing programs at each school to talk to students about risky behavior.
"It's easy to say, 'Oh those kids are just bragging about having oral sex,'" Boian said. "But if there is any truth to it, you should" address the issue.
Nationally, public-health experts report that teen-agers appear to be engaging in high-risk sexual practices without caution and with alarming casualness. Nearly 1 in 10 reports losing his or her virginity before the age of 13, a 15 percent increase since 1997, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. According to several surveys, as many as half of teens ages 13 to 19 say they have had oral sex. Other communities across the country are grappling with the problem and are instituting policies that require more supervision and education.
Lexington pediatrician Tom Pauly said his patients are asking him about oral sex and telling him they think it's safer than vaginal intercourse.
"It's a new issue," said Bryan Station Middle Counselor Lynette Schmiedeknecht. "It's more part of the culture, more talked about. It seems that in talking with the kids, they don't consider oral sex (to be) sex. They just think it's something they do as an adolescent."
Dealing with incidents directly and speaking bluntly with middle school students is key to helping them understand the ramifications of their decisions, parents and doctors said. Damage to reputations and illnesses are two of the dangers.
"We advise them to abstain," Pauly said. "We talk about medical complications and the psychosocial complications of engaging in oral sex at such a young age."
After Jessie Clark Middle students talked about the popularity of oral sex with an assistant principal this spring, principal Steve Carmichael said: "We invited two moms to come in and shared our concerns. It wasn't a conversation as awkward as you might think. We would rather overreact than underreact."
The issue isn't a routine part of sex education classes, officials said.
Mike Kennedy, acting health education coordinator, said that until 1990, the district had a sex education curriculum. But now, site-based councils at each school are responsible for deciding what kind of sex education is dispensed, he said.
Seven middle schools offer programs that teach abstinence only, Kennedy said. Other schools cover sex education in health classes. But Kennedy said he doesn't think oral sex is discussed anywhere as part of the middle school curriculum.
At Beaumont, principal Mowery said the quick intervention -- writing to parents -- was successful. Parents responded to meetings about how to discuss sexual issues with their children. And as the year progressed, counselors and administrators had fewer kids talking about the parties.
Only a small minority of students have actually had oral sex, Mowery thinks.
"Ninety percent of our kids," he said, "make good decisions in every aspect of their lives."
It's good for your daughter to choose abstinence but not all young people will do so. Adolescents should learn about the risks of various kinds of sexual activity and safe-sex alternatives before they become sexually active. Sexual ignorance can result in unwanted pregnancy and sexually-transmitted disease.
There are no safe-sex alternatives. Condoms fail some 10% to 15% of the time, and provide no barrier to many viral sexual diseases. Kids have been taught lies about safe-sex for many a year. The explosion of VD (things like drug-resistant, untreatable gonorrhea, herpes, papillomavirus (which causes cancer)) is an indication of that. And then, or course, there's the abortion thing. Kids and adults who think one can simply get an abortion (murder) when safe-sex doesn't work, and that there will be no psychological and long lasting consequences are horribly fooling themselves.
Gentlemen, I believe we need to start local FReeper groups of like-minded parents, and make each date "run a gauntlet" before courting our daughters.
"It's a new issue," said Bryan Station Middle Counselor Lynette Schmiedeknecht. "It's more part of the culture, more talked about. It seems that in talking with the kids, they don't consider oral sex (to be) sex.
Thanks, SLick Billy, you piece of trash.
Nothing is 100% safe but a hand job is safer than oral sex, oral sex is safer than intercourse, and intercourse with a condom is safer than unprotected intercourse.
Either you are currently a teenager, OR grew up in some alternative Universe where 14 year-olds engaging in "head-paties" was the norm.
Well, you can teach your daughter to give boys hand jobs and oral sex (and they'll be very, very popular with just the right kind of boy!). I think I'll teach my daughters differently.
I think AlGore invented it.
BTW, what ever happend to middle school parties where the boys and girls stood at opposite ends of the place and stared at each in shear terror. These as 12, 13, and 14 year old for crying out loud.
Something to stay AWAY from!
I disagree with you. Abstinence!
It's not so tough if you care more about your children than chasing a buck. If you start them out young understanding the difference between right and wrong, they will seek out friends who don't engage in improper behavior of this type or pressure their friends to do so.
My children have been told since they were young not to pay attention to the mainstream media or television crap which seeks to portray inappropriate behavior as normal.
Are you saying that the oral sex we're talking about is ONE-WAY ONLY? The boys aren't reciprocating and performing on the girls?
That's only half of the oral-sex equation. If the guy isn't willing to return the favor, "cut him off."
Come to think of it...
Michael
Add about ten years of experience to those ages. The kids of today have sex the same way that they eat. It is just an accepted thing. It wasn't too long ago that they would be called sluts. Now, it is normal.
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