Thermobaric Bomb Destroys Hobbit Hole

My own silly thoughts ^ | 03/04/2002 | Constitution Day

[Constitution Day]

Thermobaric Bomb Destroys Hobbit Hole In a shocking development from Down Under, New Zealand's Air Force today used a thermobaric bomb to destroy the "Hobbit Hole" recently dug in Wellington. In a statement, the acting NZ Defence Minister, known simply as "GuillermoX", said "The Ministry hopes this will serve as a warning to all those who build such caves to conceal the terrorists in our country." He added, "Can anyone else look at the sun and see anything?" Carl Gifford, a stonemason from Wellington, says he used a 10-tonne digger to make the hole. Claims Mr Gifford, "I just got done building the chimney and lantern on top! I wasn't hurting anybody, honestly!" The house was a part of a series of stonework mounds, designs and sculptures dotted around his land, until they were all destroyed this evening. Mr Gifford was reported to have barely escaped through a dimensional door with his life. The fate of any Hobbits, Orcs, Elves, moose, cheese lovers, alien pirates or even terrorists who did not escape the Hole is currently unknown. Lord of the Rings fans were reportedly NOT amused. Disclaimer: Moderators and FReepers, This is HUMOR. Humor-impaired LOTR fans should stay in their Hobbit Hole. Further, GuillermoX has not endorsed this thread in any way. Please do not flame Constitution Day. He is only joking. He is only having a bit of fun and does not want to kill the Hobbit Hole thread... maybe just injure it a little.

[lds23]

It can't have been a worse bomb than the Rankin-Bass "Hobbit" cartoon.

[Constitution Day]

>blushing<

Travis, you are too, too kind.

[Constitution Day]

Never saw it... sorry.

[HairOfTheDog]

It was BAAAD. Boromir wears a little skirt.

[Constitution Day]

I look nothing like Dan Rather! - Shame on you!

Probably more like Ted Koppel... hmmm?

[smithson]

I hope thats glue on her fingers.

[GuillermoX]

ROFL! Will comment later...

[HairOfTheDog]

I don't look like Ted Koppel either...

More like a Ashley Banfield [ugh] girl-type reporter from a Shire In Conflict! I even put on some hairy-feet and died my hair to blend in with the locals!

[Diddle E. Squat]

Oooohhhhhh, I see.

[Argh]

That's OK. I've had a couple of girlfriends with really nice hobbits in my time. See you.

[Cleburne]

The President (For Life) of Rhun has condemned Elrond's statements as 'disgusting and hateful", and is encouraging the US to further its campaign against Hobbits, who, he says, "are vile low creatures". Meanwhile, the Parliment of the Southron Nation, in conjunction with Jesse Jackson, is accusing Elrond and the inhabitants of the Shire of racism.

"Ugh, they don't like us becasue we're swarthy! Er, right Jesse?" said Ughlu, spokesman of the Middle-Earth Association for the Advancement of Swarthy People.

[Constitution Day]

More like a Ashley Banfield [ugh] girl-type reporter...

Pictures! Pictures, I say!
(good thing you didn't say "like a Laurie Dhue girl-type reporter")

[Constitution Day]

LOL

[NeoCaveman]

He added, "Can anyone else look at the sun and see anything?"

I can see it. I can see it.

[Constitution Day]

ROFL... That was just for the WFTD crew!

[Constitution Day]

Thanks Bill!

I like to keep my audience... riveted!

[Rebelbase]

I'm gonna start a Hobbit defense league. Arm them all with AR-15's, Colt 1911's, get one of the ex SF guys around here to give them training and let Gandolf take care of the "creative ordinance".

[Constitution Day]

Went a bit overboard with the disclaimer didn't ya, dude... Are the ringgeeks that panty-twisted?

See #77.
Any group that can push such a thread to 3100+ replies is apt to do anything.

[Constitution Day]

...and let Gandolf take care of the "creative ordinance".

I guess you mean creative ordnance...

since creative ordinances are what the Demo-Rats specialize in.

[ColdSteelTalon]

That Hobbit is TOAST !!!!