THE SOUTH - LIKE IT OR WE'LL KICK YOUR A$$!

via email | Jan. 12, 2002 | Unknown

[herewego]

bbq is an art that takes years to master. no matter a whole pig or leg quarters, gettin the meat done wid'out burnin' the outs takes lotsa years. Lewis Grizzard bump... Lewis was a true treasure...

[DaBearOne]

Makes sence to me!

[nopardons]

No yankee, worth his salt, would probably have her !

[ATOMIC_PUNK]

lol i forgot one

• Your whole family is Democrats except little Mary. She lernt to readin'.
• You think fast food is hitting a possum at 65 mph.
• You can get dog hair from out of your belly button.
• You have a bumper sticker that says, "MY MOTHER'S AN HONOR STUDENT AT SOUTH LITTLE ROCK JR. HIGH."
• You take a six-pack cooler to church.
• Your family tree has no forks.
• You have refused to watch the Academy Awards since "Smokey and the Bandit" was snubbed for best picture.
• You had to remove a toothpick for your wedding pictures.
• You use a weedeater in your living room.
• You consider your license plate personalized because your dad made it in prison.
• You have a rag for a gas cap.
• The blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.
• The third grade teacher says little Bubba could be a mathematical genius because he's got thirteen fingers.
• Fifth grade was the best six years of your life.

OH SHOOT DID I SAY ONE

[sweetliberty]

Didn't have one for South Dakota, but I've been there! This is close enough.

You know you're from North Dakota...

• If your definition of a small town is one that doesn't have a bar . . .
• If you can identify a Minnesota accent . . .
• If "down south" to you means Aberdeen . . .
• If you have no problem spelling "Wahpeton" . . .
• If you have an ICBM in your back yard . . .
• If you have as many Canadian coins in your pockets as American ones . . .
• If your kids' baseball and softball games have ever been snowed out . . .
• If you drive 70 mph on the highway and pass on the right . . .
• If at least 50% of your relatives smell like beets . . .
• If you don't understand what the big deal about Moorhead is . . .
• If people borrow things to you . . .
• If you have ever served glorified rice at a wedding reception . . .
• If you refer to the state just east of you as "The People's Republic of Minnesota" . . .
• If you expect to be excused from school for deer season . . .
• If the soup du jour at your home-town cafe is always beer cheese or knoephla . . .
• If you like to send liberal Democrats to Congress and rock-ribbed Republicans to the statehouse . . .
• If your favorite hors'douvre is little weenies and barbeque sauce in a crockpot . . .
• If you refer to the blessed union of an ELCA Lutheran and a Missouri-Synod Lutheran as a "mixed marriage" .
• If you'd like to laugh at this, but you're afraid someone will notice you . . .

[nopardons]

Your false bravado is uncout and appalling; just a cover-up for you inferiority complex. Pity that, but usual here.

YOU LOST THE CIVIL WAR AND IT'S OVER ! GET OVER IT .

[sweetliberty]

Your whole family is Democrats except little Mary. She lernt to readin'.

ROTFL!!!

[4TheFlag]

are not for the weak stomach of a yankee

HEY, ever try SCRAPPLE????

[austinTparty]

Goo-goo clusters.

[sweetliberty]

"HEY, ever try SCRAPPLE????"

Never heard of it.

[rockfish59]

the barrel roll/t-bone!
amazing to watch it all in slow motion!
wonder if he got 'roll over money'? lol!

[rockfish59]

watch out!
he's got a 45-70!

[austinTparty]

Pork of course!

Not if you're from Texas! (Brisket, anyone?) ;-)

[4TheFlag]

Never heard of it

I grew up in Pennsylvania, my Dad used to make me eat Scrapple for breakfast, it's a mixture of pig parts that Hormel doesn't even have a clue what they are, mixed in this gelatin stuff and then fried up, UFDA, I hated it, but ate it....

You won't hurt this yankees stomach :)

[4TheFlag]

HERE HERE.... to BEEF!

[4TheFlag]

OHH YOU are BAAADD dude, ROTFLMAO!

[Big Guy and Rusty 99]

I live in Longwood (just moved here from occupied Boston) and it seems pretty Southern to me.

My wife and I drove down here from Boston and I have to say as a former northerner that southerners are some of the most gentile, refined, polite, friendly people I've met. People actually say hello to you when you pass them walking down the street. I will never live north of the mason-dixon again!

[4TheFlag]

Didn't have one for South Dakota, but I've been there

LOL, North Dakota is close enough, thank you!!!

Where did you go to in South Dakota??

[nopardons]

I have no idea what that is. Is it a gun or his IQ standing?