Answer Helen Thomas's Question

News | 11/26/01 | Me

[gortklattu]

At a press briefing, the wizard of the Washington press corps, Helen Thomas, noted that Spain was holding some suspected terrorists in jail, then asked Ari Fleischer if President Bush was going to invade Spain!

It's a stupid question, to say the least.

Fleischer was cordial in his reply. But, what if she had asked Rummie, or a Freeper?

How would you have answered? What would Rummie have said?

[exmoor]

M..I..C..K..E..Y..M..O..U..S..E.. Mickey Mouse, Mickey Mouse. You get the picture.

[CRAW]

Yes Helen........And the Marines are going to ride you ashore.

Stupid

[headsonpikes]

"I wasn't expecting..."

"NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition!"

[Teacup]

"NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition!"

HA! HA! HA! Our two main weapons are, Stealth, surprise, and a fanatical devotion to the pope."

[strela]

Helen, who does your makeup in the morning, and your hair? Phyllis Diller?"

Makeup by trowel, hair by Cuisinart, sex life by Snap-On Tools.

[xzins]

Helen, would you repeat that question....naw...it's too choice...would you write it down and submit it for the record? Do you mind if we frame it -- and will you sign it? (Ari whistling tune from "Wizard of Oz."...."if I only had a br____.)

[Centurion2000]

How would you have answered?

Well, you just couldn't print it here.

[aculeus]

One word response to all Helen Thomas questions: "Depends."

LOL. Best response yet.

Thanks. (I agree.)

[Jhoffa_]

Why, "The bombing starts in ten minutes"

20 minutes later hold a press confrence and deny any knowledge of why Helen Thomas and 15 other reporters fainted simultaneously.

[sweetliberty]

Helen, let me ask you a question. Do you eat with utensils?

[conqueror]

Thanks for the post. I just forwarded the whole page to helen at helent@hearstdc.com hehehehehehe

[mad_as_he$$]

Sure one day during siesta we will finish them off. cheese or no cheese....

[Utah Girl]

Helen Thomas resigned from UPI in May of 2000. Why is she still at the press conferences? Does she write for any press?

Helen was hired by the Hearst Corporation because of her vast experience as a White House reporter for centuries. She writes a column for them. IMO her writing is sophomoric.

[ZDaphne]

I think Ari's reply was the best. "I wasn't aware we were invading Spain." (Not his exact words probably, but close.)

[OrioleFan]

She became a free agent of the DNC News Network.

[L.N. Smithee]

"Not only will we invade Spain, we're going to pillage it, too. Say...want me to bring you back some Spanish Fly?"

[gortklattu]

You sent her all this? GREAT!!!!

When are the Freepers going to get a "reporter" to cover the White House press briefings??

[Tribune7]

The proper answer Ari should have given was "tomorrow."

I heard a story concerning a similar situation involving Patton.
Apparently, there was some sort of problem with the North African invasion fleet and Eisenhower cabled Patton as to what was up. Patton answered that he was forgoing the invasion of Africa and attacking Spain.
Eisenhower reportedly did not appreciate the humor.

I do not vouch for this story's authenticity.