Where All the Men Have Gone?

Front Page Magazine ^ | July 11, 2025 | Mark Tapson

[E. Pluribus Unum]

And how to bring them back.

In a recent New York Times article titled, “Men, Where Have You Gone? Please Come Back,” Rachel Drucker laments what she calls “a collective shift” in men, a “slow vanishing of presence.” So many single men, she writes, aren’t “sitting across from someone on a Saturday night, trying to connect.” Instead, they “have retreated from intimacy, hiding behind firewalls, filters and curated personas, dabbling and scrolling.” She adds, “We miss you.”

Ms. Drucker – a single, 54-year-old Chicagoan – hints that pornography is at least partly to blame for this state of affairs. She mentions that she herself spent years working in that field as the custodian of records for Playboy and its affiliated hardcore properties. She worked closely with marketing teams to understand “what cues tempt the average 18-to-36-year-old cis heterosexual man. What drew him in. What kept him coming back.” She learned that it wasn’t intimacy or mutuality, but “access to simulation.”

Now many men, she believes, have “quietly withdrawn from intimacy and vulnerability” into “indifference.” The sexes have moved, she observes, into an era when traditional courting has devolved into “directionless orbiting,” “men circling intimacy but never entering it… ‘seeing where it goes’ without ever going anywhere.” She even mourns the “unscripted contact” of one-night stands.

She concludes by pleading men, “You can still come back. We’re still here, those of us who are willing to cocreate something true… And we haven’t stopped hoping.”

The male retreat from the courting dance of days past is a tragedy, but so is Ms. Drucker’s obliviousness to the reasons for it. Yes, pornography is a huge factor; the ubiquitous availability of the most explicit imagery imaginable (and even unimaginable) to anyone with an internet connection is a terrible scourge in our society – and not...

[alexander_busek]

I’m far from being a feminist, but that double standard has always annoyed me.

That double standard has a perfect justification: In the early phase of their prime dating years, men are at a distinct disadvantage - competing with virtually all other men between 18 and 45 years of age for a relatively smallish group of twentysomething women. So, because of simple numbers, they start out in dating life on the back foot. And that greatly influences and shapes their general outlook on the dynamics of the dating scene, embittering many of them.

In contrast, women just emerging from childhood / adolescence enjoy an abundance of attention - for which they have to invest next to no energy. They will have to actually expend more intellectual effort in learning how to fend off male attention than to attract it.

That, by the same token, shapes their overall attitude.

Then, when women reach their 30s, and acquire the realization that their SMV is diminishing, the tables are turned on them.

"A key that can open many locks is a valuable key. A lock that can be opened by many keys is a worthless lock."

Prove me wrong!

Regards,

[alexander_busek]

People genuinely don’t care about men checking out until it starts effecting affecting women. “How dare you go your own way? It’s causing me problems.”

"Epidemic of male loneliness - Male suicide rates skyrocketing - Women and minorities most affected!"

Regards,

[alexander_busek]

I glossed over everything she said, because I couldn’t ignore the noserings and tattoos. Told her I’m not interested in anything she has to say, and to leave. She started to repeat herself several times, I closed the door in her face.

Those pesky Jehovah's Witnesses are becoming more annoying by the day!

Regards,

[dennisw]

Ben McLemore sentenced to 100 months in prison after rape conviction

Baxter Holmes
Jul 9, 2025, 07:31 PM

In a follow-up statement, McLemore said he was “surprised and disappointed” by the verdict.

“As I testified, I never believed I was having sex without full consent,” McLemore said.

“We hope the Oregon Legislature will adopt a ‘second look’ process that would evaluate whether he should serve the entire 100 month sentence or whether, beyond the short alcohol-influenced encounter that led to this conviction, he is a considerate and humble person who has lived an honorable, community-focused life,” McLemore’s attorney, Kristen Winemiller, told ESPN on Wednesday.

Healy told jurors during the trial that the woman had been drinking heavily, passed out on a living room couch around 2 a.m., then regained partial consciousness in the morning when McLemore sexually penetrated her with his fingers and then began having sex with her.

McLemore’s attorneys disputed the victim’s account and claimed she initiated sexual contact and consented to it. They also asserted that the woman was sober enough to consent even though both she and McLemore were intoxicated. On Wednesday, the victim appeared by video and read a statement.

[alexander_busek]

This suggests approximately 0.023% of American men, or about 1 in 4,310, meet all criteria, assuming independence.

Thanks for doing the math! (BTW: Those parameters are somewhat correlated.)

But 0.023% of 160 million is still an enormous number of men to choose from, right? I mean: That's still approx. 37 THOUSAND men, right? And that ONE woman needs only ONE man who fits the bill, right?

So there's no problem here, right? So she can safely discard 36,999 of those men and "settle" for the remaining one, right?

Ri-ight?

Regards,

[thecodont]

Though being good-looking never hurt, I think the most important quality a woman can possess that will attract and keep a man is kindness. A woman who is kind to her guy and to other people will always be appreciated.

Good point.

[onona]

He quickly changes the fantasy to have a dog at his side instead.

LOL

If only I'd seen that commercial sooner.....

[Keyhopper]

Now that the divorce money is gone, they need a retirement plan.
My retirement plan is going to Thailand for a month, getting a condo on the beach, and hire a good (maid)

[ansel12]

“””””What about the male sluts and hoes?
The misogyny on this site is out of control.”””””

The sameness of male and female is a tired old feminist agenda that has been used to turn females into what the left has turned them into today, it destroyed the family and community and Western civilization, it enabled the destruction of civilization and of the Western nations and has erased much of the Christian influence on earth, not to mention the broken, unhappy and exploited female sex of today’s America.

Polygamous Islam and wives in burkas is filling the empty spaces of what had been the Christian world that your thinking created.

[ansel12]

I just don’t believe that people actually sit around watching porn a lot, or so much that it occupies their time and weekends when there are women all around them.

I would also be surprised if blue collar men don’t still pursue women in a more aggressive, “let’s party and get laid” and natural way, while the more feminist affected and culture sensitive males are too timid to go for for the pay off when they see a woman.

[50sDad]

Pornography isn’t the CAUSE... it’s the RESULT. Decades of man-slamming has made them decide being vulnerable to women who can’t accept them just isn’t worth the effort. Thanks, ladies.

[Degaston]

Why would men in a eorld with lots of corrupt family lawyers scare men away from women?

[50sDad]

"Too many modern women act like men. If you’re a man, there’s not much point in having another man mentality partner join your life. Act feminine, and you’ll find men around you. Lose weight, dye your hair a natural color, style it like a traditional female, don’t expect him to be impressed with your career, or your time in the paratroopers, wear sundresses, and give your voice sort of a musical tone. And don’t give up the prize to 25 other men first."

I was raised on a diet of 1930's to 1950's movie musicals. Women were generally smart, well-dressed, perky, charming and supportive. Imagine my surprise by the time I reached adulthood in the 1980s.

My work life in the years that followed included having to keep my mouth shout if I wanted to pay a woman a simple compliment that she looked nice. By the time I was 50, "femininity" had become an outmoded concept because few women still wanted put in the effort to look nice, and men were "evil" for being trad in any way.

Sorry ladies... you brought this on yourselves.

[50sDad]

This place has deteriorated into a really bad Mexican soap opera.

I LOVE Mexican soap operas! When we first got cable decades ago, I'd put them on and speaking few words of Spanish, I would watch them EMOTE at each other!

[linMcHlp]

bttt

[AppyPappy]

Women have been emasculated by LGBT. They don’t even exist anymore.

[SMARTY]

My friend (a confirmed bachelor) says the idea of a liberal judge in a divorce proceeding terrifies him.

"Who needs marriage? Just find a woman you hate and buy her a house"

[A_perfect_lady]

She learned that it wasn’t intimacy or mutuality, but “access to simulation.”

I feel almost certain she means 'stimulation.'

[A_perfect_lady]

In other words, the traditional family is a thing of the past for most of society.

Which was the goal of the progressives for a long time; a traditional family wasn't malleable enough for the Marxist goals. Now they realize that all their tinkering has by-products. The Law of Unintended Consequences, I think they call it.

[A_perfect_lady]

So bicycles don’t need fish, either. These liberated women forget that most streets are two-way.

That's an excellent summary.