Posted on 05/14/2018 1:37:35 PM PDT by Oldeconomybuyer
I don’t think I have the skills to easily assimilate into Donald Trump’s America. And that can mean only one thing: I should be deported.
It was a difficult conclusion to reach, but after listening to White House Chief of Staff John Kelly’s recent comments on undocumented immigrants, I see no other path forward.
Maybe I should self-deport. That’s part of the hope, of course, that by making America inhospitable to outsiders, some will just leave.
But I’m not going to do that. You know us unassimilated legal residents. We’re notoriously lazy.
No, the government is going to have to deport me, and to help in that effort, I’ll outline the obstacles to my assimilation into Trump’s version of America.
1) My culture and my Catholic upbringing are incompatible with the the idea that mothers and their children seeking asylum should be separated from each other once they enter the country.
2) I do speak English, but not in a way that’s compatible with the current language used by this administration and its supporters.
3) Lastly, the country I come from taught me to understand history and recognize that things called “facts” are worth considering.
The idea that immigrants don’t learn English, don’t assimilate, don’t contribute, take jobs from American workers, and are more prone to be criminals has been knocked down by study after study after study and is in no way supported by data.
I am unable to overlook these things and embrace the idea that we are being invaded by menacing hordes of disreputable others.
Those three flaws disqualify me from becoming a member of modern American society under President Trump. And that makes me an unassimilated foreigner in America.
So please send me back to my home country.
Truth be told, I miss it terribly.
(Excerpt) Read more at chicagotribune.com ...
Re: “The government is going to have to deport me.”
Although that sentence was written as political mockery, illegal immigrants in America have taken that message to heart.
I just read a report at Center for Immigration Studies that says USA Immigration Courts have 700,000 unresolved cases.
They are currently clearing a record 180,000 cases per year, under Trump’s new management.
However, even at that pace, it will take FOUR years to clear the current cases, even if ZERO new cases are filed.
And - from memory - about 300,000 illegal immigrants are still in the USA, even though they have received a Final Removal Order.
Good post! I needed a hearty laugh at mid-day...
Good post! I needed a hearty laugh at mid-day...
‘pop-culture misfires and political blowhards,’
That is a description of him.
Mike Rothko? Hardly. That piece is a not funny liberal gush. Royko never wrote like that.
What a wimp Rex Huppke is. That’s no man.
I knew he was a faggot.
And we'd like the chance to miss you. So let's get started ...
I think that is an excellent idea, and you should follow through. Also renounce your citizenship. America will be a better place without you.
Haven’t you heard? Self-deporting is a thing.
Just deport yourself, doofus!
No loss here; not even a little...
This little dope couldn’t hold Royko’s jockstrap
You’re right, but he sure dreams of holding it and much, much more.
“That’s part of the hope, of course, that by making America inhospitable to outsiders, some will just leave.”
Rex, Trump is only making America inhospitable to illegal immigrants and criminals. Legal immigrants are always welcome.
Waiting...
Posting images on Freerepublic that fit:
[img src=”image.jpeg” width=”360”]
I’ll buy him a bag lunch to go with.
Well they got the sanctimonious prick part right....
I am around a lot of immigrants ; Indians , Africans , Asians , Pacific Islanders . So few speak English well . Their kids do . All speak heavily accented versions of English , esp Indians , whom despite haven;t been speaking English for centuries still insist on corruption their V’s to W’ and W’s to V’s . Why? Are they not aware of how the word(s) are spelled ? All these ‘immigrants’ chatter away to one another in their families in their foreign languages , esp the Indians . No one around them has any idea what they are talking about and feel hesitant to speak to them . They are thus insular within their little family unit . In public . Yet, if you ask them where they are from , they tell you ‘Baltimore’ , or some such . As if we real Americans are fooled . Suggestion : You want to speak entirely in your native dialect ? Go back to Bangalore , or wherever . Then there is the Pacific islanders . Here for all the jobs and benefits ( Thanks Bill Clinton!) but zero cultural or linguistic engagement with America or Americans . On top of which they are scary drivers ! Just recently out of their canoes I guess . Have immigrants to America always been like this ? Doubtful . I agree with Kelly : “They don’t speak English, obviously,” he said. “That’s a big thing. They don’t speak English. They don’t integrate well.” 100% true.
Just leave and don’t let the doorto hit you on the way out!
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.
