My heart breaks for anyone who has adopted Russian children. The children desperately need care but adoptee parents have no idea what they are getting into and are not equipped to handle it.
My ex-husband and his wife adopted a girl from the Ukraine with serious physical problems and psychological problems. She has caused them untold heartache and hundreds of thousands of dollars, several stays in mental hospitals and is now an adult, pregnant, on drugs living in a homeless shelter. The baby’s father is in prison.
I believe the heartache and inability to fix her is killing my ex. His wife washed her hands years ago.
That’s sad.
Absolutely. I have been around many of these Russian adoptees & their parents and am quite familiar with the adoption process (for those of you who don’t know...it could take years, several trips to Russia & cost $20K or more). Problem was the prospective parents assumed any red flags were due to a language barrier when it was really FAS & severe attachment disorder. Not fixable.
The Russian adoption organizations & orphanages put on quite a “show” to get the kids placed. Got to see first hand over a few years what these children were really like...and a good percentage of them were obviously maladjusted...quite unfortunate. And, most of the parents were overwhelmed trying to deal with it...just like your ex.
Sometimes things do turn out OK. Sometimes even better than OK
But nature can be a b!tch and sometimes all the nurture you can muster just is not enough