Posted on 07/26/2017 7:30:41 AM PDT by Jagermonster
BOSTON—Two hundred stuffed animals, two violins, and a 7-1/2 foot-tall Christmas tree: That was just a corner of the possessions Rosalie and Bill Kelleher accumulated over their 47-year marriage. And, they realized, it was about 199 stuffed animals more than their two grown children wanted.
Going from a four-bedroom house in New Bedford, Mass. – with an attic stuffed full of paper stacked four-feet tall – to a 1,300-square-foot apartment took six years of winnowing, sorting, shredding, and shlepping stuff to donation centers.
Among the possessions the Kellehers are keeping are three hutches – one that belonged to his mother, one that belonged to her mother, and one that they purchased together 35 years ago. One shelf is carefully lined with teacups Rosalie collected during her world travels. Another houses a delicate tea set from Japan, a gift her mother received on her wedding day.
“We really don’t need them,” she admits.
That refrain is becoming a common one as baby boomers begin to downsize and discover (as many generations before them have) that their children do not want their stuff. In fact, they recoil in something close to horror at the thought of trying to find room for the collections of Hummels; the Thomas Kinkade paintings; the complete sets of fine china and crystal, carefully preserved and brought out at holiday meals.
For their parents, to have a lifetime of carefully chosen treasures dismissed as garage-sale fodder can be downright painful.
“When [people] try to throw something away, they feel like they are losing ... personal history, losing a bit of themselves, losing a little of their identity, and they fear if they get rid of it they’ll never have that same experience again,” says Randy Frost, a psychology professor at Smith College . . . .
(Excerpt) Read more at csmonitor.com ...
I don’t want to leave much of anything to her because she’ll either take it to Goodwill or sell things for five cents on the dollar at a garage sale. I don’t know what to do about this. :0(
Uhhhhh....you could send it to me??? XD
I have taken a load to charity almost every week this summer, made trips to dump and landfill. Getting rid of clutter feels delicious.
In your case, surely there's a broker?
Great minds think alike
My mother in law is the same way, and I can’t say I disagree either. We are always saying “how could someone disregard their great grandparents that way?! Don’t they even care about where they came from?” Or in my case I assume sadly that they’ve gotten into drugs or something related to general societal decay. It’s a symptom.
But, on the upside, people are doing lovely things with old photos nowadays. Look around on Pinterest or etsy and you might be encouraged to donate them to a talented artist or crafter. They could at least make something dignified and beautiful with them. :)
Oh, dear. Hugs and prayers.
All my fine jewelry and sterling has been appraised and insured in a personal articles floater on my homeowner’s insurance policy. I pay over $100 per month just for my PAF premiums and I’ve had the policy for almost 21 years.
I’ve actually thought about (eventually) giving or donating my fine, china, linens and crystal to other tablescaping woman /women who will understand and treasure the value of my collection. There is a sizable community of tablescaping blogger women scattered all over the U.S., Europe and South America. What we all have in common is love of beautiful dishes, entertaining, and decorating beautiful and elaborate themed tables. There is a woman named Susan who lives in Atlanta and she personally helped launch tablescaping blogs to a new level about 10 years ago. Her blog name is betweennapsontheporch. She has an absolutely beautiful blog/web site. I sometimes think that when I finally have to REALLY downsize, I may donate my fine things to her. She’s about 10 years younger than me, I think she would treasure and take really good care of my things.
I’m 61, I think I have 15 to 20 years left of the energy I have today, I will keep collecting fine tableware and tablescaping for a while.
Sadly, I have used those photos at antique centers for theater performers I have directed. And sometimes for comic effect. So I think I’ll probably be ripping them up - I’m afraid to put those old photos in the fireplace!!!
I detest antiques and lace doilies.
My style is urban industrial.
We had to divest my grandmothers estate and my in-laws estate and the weeping and wailing over the junk we pitched was comical.
It was junk. Old junk.
Go to antique centers on a regular basis, you’ll find nothing ever moves. It just sits there, year after year.
My husband gifted me with a Mikimoto necklace strand, a matching bracelet with diamond rondelles, and matching pearl stud earrings. I never understood the close-up beauty, value and price until my husband gave me my pearl set. There are pearls, and then there are Mikimoto pearls.
How warm of you.
I am facing this with my depression baby parents who are in their eighties. A house full of stuff. I have four nieces who will take stuff like china and furniture. I lead a modest lifestyle and only want some of their New Mexico artwork and the bobcat my dad had made into a rug. I am NOT looking forward to getting the house cleared out when that day comes, but I can work anywhere and my brother has a client-facing investment advisor job, so I will be the one doing the estate work.
I know my kids wants the train layout, but we don’t have much in our house. We can dust trinkets or enjoy our kids...we choose the enjoy our kids...
Boy, there is a place up here called My Sister’s Garage and they do a huge business and they have had a fair amount of national exposure.
They cannot keep items in stock and everything moves quickly. You can find them on the net and on FB.
Prices are good too.
I have a large collection of jadite I’d like to get rid of. Thanks for the advice.
It’s always ONE sibling, lol! Take your time; don’t do it all in one day.
I certainly hope you check with all of your relatives about your photos. There may well be one — a niece, a nephew, perhaps — who cares about those old photos.
This summer, for the first time in my life, I got to see a photograph of my maternal grandmother, who died about 15 years before I was born. I had no idea of what he looked like! Brought a tear to my eye when a cousin brought the photo to a family reunion that I hosted. I scanned several photos that this cousin and another had brought. Means a lot to me to have these image.
Photos are a lot different than furniture or decorative paintings. They are most definitely a connection to your lineage.
my kids want nothing...
You make a good point but my family is very small and they are almost entirely male. None of them have expressed any interest in the photos. My plan is to go through them all, select ones that I think they would enjoy and get rid of the rest. I think, after what you’ve said, I’ll just put photos of the great grandparents in envelopes, mail it to them, and have them sort it out. After years of dealing with my sick and elderly parents, they need to occasionally make a decision!
Thank you for your advice.
I set a fine table but have never heard of table-scaping.
I keep my sterling at the bank, saves polishing that way.
I got rid of best and better, and bought a pattern that I love, collect the vintage pieces, Johnson’s Friendly Village, certainly not everyone’s taste, and use it for all meals, everyday and celebratory.
Goes well with Thanksgiving and Christmas meals and it just makes me smile.
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