My jaw dropped...
"I didn't know you wanted it..."
Posted on 07/26/2017 7:30:41 AM PDT by Jagermonster
BOSTON—Two hundred stuffed animals, two violins, and a 7-1/2 foot-tall Christmas tree: That was just a corner of the possessions Rosalie and Bill Kelleher accumulated over their 47-year marriage. And, they realized, it was about 199 stuffed animals more than their two grown children wanted.
Going from a four-bedroom house in New Bedford, Mass. – with an attic stuffed full of paper stacked four-feet tall – to a 1,300-square-foot apartment took six years of winnowing, sorting, shredding, and shlepping stuff to donation centers.
Among the possessions the Kellehers are keeping are three hutches – one that belonged to his mother, one that belonged to her mother, and one that they purchased together 35 years ago. One shelf is carefully lined with teacups Rosalie collected during her world travels. Another houses a delicate tea set from Japan, a gift her mother received on her wedding day.
“We really don’t need them,” she admits.
That refrain is becoming a common one as baby boomers begin to downsize and discover (as many generations before them have) that their children do not want their stuff. In fact, they recoil in something close to horror at the thought of trying to find room for the collections of Hummels; the Thomas Kinkade paintings; the complete sets of fine china and crystal, carefully preserved and brought out at holiday meals.
For their parents, to have a lifetime of carefully chosen treasures dismissed as garage-sale fodder can be downright painful.
“When [people] try to throw something away, they feel like they are losing ... personal history, losing a bit of themselves, losing a little of their identity, and they fear if they get rid of it they’ll never have that same experience again,” says Randy Frost, a psychology professor at Smith College . . . .
(Excerpt) Read more at csmonitor.com ...
After seeing what our friends’ children suffered, we sold our place, gave away just about everything, donated the rest, and downsized to a small, manageable condo.
Handing your kids a place they have to manage long distance and dispose of accumulated “stuff” is not a good idea.
I can relate.
“.just gave some Jewelry to my daughter-in law...”
Isn’t it fun! Most of my jewelry came from my husband when I was already old and wrinkled. Seeing the most dazzling pieces on my beautiful DIL is a joy.
Things are harder and more complicated to do when you're older. In the old days daughters spent many days and months helping parents with these kinds of moves, but today most daughters are working and have families. The love is there - but not the easy access to 'time'.
A comprehensive business dealing with this issue would be MORE than a company swooping in to take the 'good stuff' to sell. It would offer a vital service that's not being offered anywhere today.
And it was nice to see those baubles on that younger person no??
As my husband is already retired(I know not fair but he is older)I am happier with less and less things....much happier.
What I thought I could not do without in my 20s, 30s, 40s and (stay with me here you youngins) and now 55 is remarkable.
Direct connect to GOD!
We take out what we came with ... our little God given souls...
Hmmmm...we have very high quality Thomasville furniture, a large collection of gorgeous Waterford Crystal, a large and quite pricey set of sterling silver flatware, and a huge collection of fine china sets, high quality linens, etc. Just my Lenox Beauty and the Beast collectibles are worth at least $5000. I check out prices in online stores, Ebay and Replacements.com. And oh yeah, there’s my Rolex watch, Mikimoto pearl set, my $16,000 diamond tennis bracelet, my $30,000 wedding set, my other fine jewelry etc. The things I’ve described above would cost at least $200k or more to replace.
I have only one child, my daughter, and although she oohs and ahhs when Tablescape and decorate for family gatherings, she has no idea how what the value of my things cost. I don’t want to leave much of anything to her because she’ll either take it to Goodwill or sell things for five cents on the dollar at a garage sale. I don’t know what to do about this. :0(
WHAT the heck is GMTA???
I think this is a huge reason many older people don’t downsize when it would seem totally appropriate - my disabled neighbor lives alone in a 4 BR 2 level house, yet can’t stand to part with her “stuff” and her son has made it clear he won’t take any of it.
Possessions become completely too precious to part with - sad.
I haven’t decided between the two, but some day I hope to have an auction or “living estate” sale when I downsize. I think it would be very freeing.
I am
Devastated for you. So sorry.
If you can sell it on ebay, do it. Those appraisers who come around generally sniff at Waterford Crystal and silverware. Well, they did at my mother’s house. Luckily, I’m keeping the 1920s Art Deco silverware!
Exactly..less really does mean more. I have MORE TIME since there’s less to manage and care about....it’s VERY freeing.
Living SMALL is a wonderful thing! You save a lot of money too!
I’m wondering what to do with all the family photos that go back more than 100 years. I hate seeing them displayed at flea markets and antique centers and I doubt the men in my family (I’m the only woman among brothers, cousins, uncles) want them.
I’m thinking of destroying them.
Great
Minds
Think
Alike.
If Jewelry give it to a trusted friend who has admired a piece. I have a beautiful gold ring my friend will get before I go...just spoke with her about this a couple weeks ago.
Or...you might get the appraised...and put them on line...you’ll never know they may go higher than they’re worth.
We are deep within this process now.
I’m trying to sell a filing cabinet on Craigs list. Turns out, nobody much needs to file paper. When I bought it, used file cabinets got snapped up immediately.
We don’t have stuffed toys, but I do have 300+ AOL floppy discs and CD’s in the original wrappers. I also have two six packs of ORIGINAL kingsize cokes. I have two drawing boards with parallel rules and a big box of obsolete drafting equipment.
I have all my correspondence over twenty years and an equal time span of telephone call records. All that will be tossed. We have a library of 1,000 +volumes that is not required.
Disposal of surplus stuff is a real chore. This is a warning to those only 65 or so.
The kids want nothing.
Ebay is full of stuff offered for sale. If you track it, closely, most never sells. The article is just too common.
Also, much of Ebay articles for sale are poorly presented. The photos are crude and the descriptions short and sweet and pointless.
However, I have sold a lot of stuff on Ebay and have offered a lot that went unsold.
My jaw dropped...
"I didn't know you wanted it..."
My dear late mother is just the opposite of these people. She was constantly purging. Even when I was in college and paying for most of my own clothes, she would go through my closet and give away anything she had not seen me wearing recently! We used to joke that she would rip clothing off our backs and send it to the Good Will.
As one of my sisters points out, however, running a house full of 11 people dictated her behavior. There was never any clutter in our house, and it was always clean.
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