Posted on 10/10/2014 1:41:12 PM PDT by EveningStar
I used to think “harmless” fun was okay, then I met a coworker who took everything to extremes. He thought every trick he pulled was brilliant and fun for all concerned. I concluded he’d been badly abused, confirmed by stories he told like his dad had convinced him his dog was dead and how hard he’d cried. (My dad did the same thing as an April Fool’s joke when I was about six. I never forgave him and I never trusted him again. I cried all day and he beat me because of it so I ended up hiding from him as I couldn’t stop crying.) Consequently, I was much like my coworker until I was convinced by friends that pranks were inappropriate. Seeing the pain my coworker caused his victims convinced me that there is no such thing as appropriate jokes or hazing that rely on hurting or convincing a coworker or “friend” that something is true when it isn’t.
There must be some other bonding experience that teams can practice that doesn’t hurt anybody.
Football hazing in general has been going on at all levels for decades. For this specific case, I don't know. You can click the "sayreville" keyword and/or do a web search.
When I was growing up boys would occasionally settle a serious disagreement with a fist fight. We all knew there were unwritten rules about how to go about that, "dirty" hits and so forth. And there were other rules, like you don't hit a girl. As school authorities suppressed any kind of physical altercation the kids lost all that. They don't know there are supposed to be limits.
Poorly written article.
People who are trained in journalism know that you summarize what happened in the first sentence. The author doesn’t get around to saying what he characterizes as “hazing” until the 5th paragraph — after a lot of descriptive characterizing adjectives like “stomach-churning” and “nauseating.”
After that, there is plenty more editorializing and no descriptions of what actually happened.
Doing a search on this story is not revealing much in the way of details and the school officials are quoted as not being willing to discuss what happened.
I was beaten regularly at home and beaten up and intimidated regularly at school — and what it taught me is that people who are bigger than you can push you around. If you fight back, you are the villain. That’s about it.
We are all responsible for how we react to our upbringing, but when sane, compassionate behavior is not being role-modeled, it is a long road for a kid to learn that with no mentoring. Eventually I decided to not be a victim and the best way to get revenge on those who did you wrong is to become a better person.
I hope that you are OK.
“I hope that you are OK.”
Thank you. I was badly affected into my mid-fifties by my bent upbringing. But I had a few compassionate friends and I listened to them. (You have to trust someone before you can listen and believe them.)
Incidentally, the coworker who was so crewel but didn’t think he was being crewel was angry one day that nobody believed him. As kindly as possible I ticked off the last ten things he’d done to fool people into believing what he was saying was true. He turned red and gestured angrily, saying, “But this time it is true!” I reminded him about the boy who cried wolf. I had no anger or acrimony in my voice but he never spoke to me again. (No loss, really.)
Hazing in my day was never about bad beatings or significant physical harm. I think “frogging” that left a bruise was about the worst harm done. I got and gave my share of frogs. NEVER was sexual or genital behavior accepted. We’d kick the sh*t out of any homo that so much as suggested it, and we did a few times. Homos were never accepted.
Did you read what I wrote? No, I didnt think so.
Try reading the entire post before you post a stupid response.
I rather like my stupid responses
i usually do too. but other folks might think i support holding young boys down and rubbing their crotches. That’s all.
lolz
I would hope they didn’t think that
Agreed. IIRC, the rule is "Don't bury the lede (lead)."
Lots of faggotry (and dykery) in hazing these days.
THIS ISN’T HAZING.....THIS IS RAPE.
Felony charges need to be filed.
Caution was used as injures were not allowed to be part of it. The persons pants got filled with grease and pulled back up tight. Total time less than a minute.
The next one was ship wide and everyone on-board even the ships Captain an Admirals were subject to it. It was called Shellback initiation or appearing before The Royal Court when for your first time crossing the equator. It was was put in your service record if you had crossed before or not and remained there permanently.
It was a one time event done by Shellbacks to Pollywogs "Wogs" meaning those who had not crossed before. If the Captain hadn't then he went through this as well.
You had to duck walk through a gauntlet of guys screaming bloody murder at you to start out with, crawl through a 24" diameter 20' long tube of kitchen grease from the past three weeks at sea saved just for the festivities, see the royal Doctor for your inoculation which was a mixture of mustard, ketchup,pickle juice, hot sauce, and who knows what put into a syringe and squirted down your throat by the corpsman.
Then there was kissing The Royal Baby. Usually the lifers who were shellbacks with the most girth were The Royal Babies. In our case it was two chiefs and the Damage Control Assistant a LT Commander. Their stomachs were rubbed in grease, mustard, jelly, ketchup, etc and they rubbed your face in it. A few more rituals I've long forgotten then the final question asked at conclusion was are you a Wog or a Shellback. If you answered Shellback you were taken aside and carefully hosed down with a fire hose. If you said Wog back to the beginning of the initiation line you went LOL. No one I know of got hurt in either one. Limits were understood.
As for the Greasing? LOL I put in work time and came out a lot worse. It had it's place. It was a down right filthy place to work and for the work to get done you had to get past the reluctance to look like tar baby at the end of the day.
First time it was done for that reason and a fraternal initiation of sorts. It never got repeated on anyone unless they were a royal screw up who kept everyone in hot water.
It’s always seemed to me that there is nothing wrong with pranks and practical jokes, as long as EVERYONE is laughing. If people are really being hurt or upset, it’s over the limit.
A friend described crossing the equator; running the gauntlet (actually crawling on hands & knees around the ship while shellbacks whipped them with cut-up firehoses) and having a shellback mount him (like riding a horse) and covering his head with peanut butter while he crawled along.
Didn’t complain at all; actually found it amusing. The night before they crossed, the wogs had their turn raising hell on the shellbacks...
I believe they’ve just arrested at least half a dozen of the rapists.
Yea that too and really it was fun and funny. Before I got out the Snipe Greasing was stopped. I imagine the Shellback initiation is very watered down now.
I know all about being hazed, but it wasn’t sexual in nature. PAINFUL, not sexual.
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