Posted on 08/08/2014 6:38:41 PM PDT by markomalley
Julie Atwood was standing at her son's casket when the phone rang. The church where her son's funeral was scheduled to be held the next day decided to abruptly cancel the service, after the pastor learned the deceased was gay and his obituary listed a surviving "husband."
Atwood said she was told it would be "blasphemous" to hold the services at the church because her son, Julion Evans, 42, was gay.
"It was devastating," she said. "I did feel like he was being denied the dignity of death."
Evans' husband, Kendall Capers, says the pair were partners for 17 years and married last year in Maryland. Evans died at home after a 4-year battle with a rare illness called Amyloidosis, which destroys organs in the body.
He says the obituary named him as "husband," and that their marriage was no secret.
"Everyone who knew us knew about our relationship," he said. "We didn't keep secrets."
The family asked for Evans' funeral to be held at New Hope Missionary Baptist Church in Tampa.
Atwood, Evans' mother, says she was baptized at the church as a child and several of her family members still attend. Atwood's current pastor agreed to preach the funeral, but they needed a large church, like New Hope, to accommodate hundreds of mourners from across the country. New Hope agreed and the service was scheduled for July 26.
But when the obituary published in the local newspaper, everything changed.
T.W. Jenkins, pastor at New Hope says was not aware of that Evans had a husband or was gay until members of his congregation saw the obit and called to complain. They did not think it was right to have the funeral at their church.
Jenkins said his church preaches against gay marriage.
"Based on our preaching of the scripture, we would have been in error to allow the service in our church," Jenkins said. "I'm not trying to condemn anyone's lifestyle, but at the same time, I am a man of God, and I have to stand up for my principles."
Because of the late change of plans, Evans' family scrambled to make new funeral arrangements, with less than 24 hours to prepare. They were unable to notify everyone, though, and some mourners showed up at the church and missed the funeral.
Capers said that was the worst part. He wanted the funeral held in a church but said he would have understood the church's position. But to cancel during his husband's wake, he said, was “disrespectful” and “wrong.”
"This is 2014, this is not the 60s or the 70s,” Capers said. “So at the end of the day I just want his wrong-doing to be exposed.”
Re: “how do you comfort the broken heart in this case?”
Funerals are done all the time where the minister does not personally know the deceased or even the family all that well or not at all - but for whatever reason, they came to you to officiate the funeral of their loved one. If you determine that the diseased was probably not a Christian, you focus on the Gospel, that all of us will face death and judgement, but in spite of our sin there is hope for us through the death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus Christ.
In other words, you focus on the needs of the living - and what they need is the Gospel.
You never know who will be in the audience and as human beings, we do not know the eternal destiny of anyone except ourselves - none of us knows the hearts of anyone else except God alone. That is why only He can make eternal judgements.
Oh it is like a wedding. It’s a formal religious occasion. And to pay respects to a dead queer in a church would be equally as sinful.
Hate the sin, right.
But to honor and pay respect to that sin in church? No freaking way.
Harsh? The fact the church did cancel is the family’s fault. They LIED to the pastor about the circumstances.
The family gets what they deserved.
Another setup like the Colorado bakery.
Boo hoo, find another funeral home more accomodating.
They reject the teachings of the church. We all sin, but we know we sin.
They do not believe they are living in sin, there’s no repentance, they are asking the church to celebrate their sin. That is not right.
"This is Thursday, not Monday or Tuesday,” Capers said.
Yup, and watch the IRS threaten to pull their 501.c.3 tax exemption.
If I were the pastor. I believe I could officiate the funeral. Either a graveside service or at a funeral home.
But NOT at the church. To conduct a queer funeral at the Lord’s house would be profane.
Living the final years of the precious gift that is life as a brazen degenerate, he is entitled to dignity in death? What is wrong with people?
When you allow another man to go in through your out door, how much dignity do you have in the first place?
Indeed.
As I read the article, the pastor of the church was not going to be doing the service - the pastor of the church the mother attended was doing the service. They were just using the church because they had so many people coming for the funeral. So if the pastor had allowed the church to be used, he really would have had no control over what was said or what message about homosexuality and gay marriage was being preached across his pulpit. He could have had a case where another minister was preaching that homosexuality was fine and gay marriage acceptable, and his church would have been associated with that heresy.
I’m simply saying that I am unable to discern the man’s heart on the basis of one news story.
Amen
So?
I get that. Not everyone is mature enough in the Christian faith to discern fundamental matters of right and wrong.
But trust me. The bible is very clear. Allowing a queer funeral in the Lord’s house would be sinful.
You cannot "discern the man's heart" but the way he lived his life tells us all we need to know about the condition of his soul. Many people may look holy on the outside while living a sinful life, but in his case, he flaunted his sin openly, making it a defining characteristic of his lifestyle. So unless you have some question whether he experienced some deathbed conversion, there does not seem to be much mystery about the condition of his heart...
I’ve only been to funerals in funeral homes, but wouldn’t they expect those close to him to speak? If so, then they had to expect the church’s response. I’ve got zero sympathy for those mourners.
Why did they expect hundreds of mourners?
Since they chose the church (why choose an anti-homosexual church?), they should’ve accepted their turndown.
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