‘The Expendables’ Reminds Us Why Matt Damon Sucks

The American Spectator ^ | 8.14.10 | John Nolte

[This Just In]

‘The Expendables’ Reminds Us Why Matt Damon Sucks

Posted By John Nolte On August 14, 2010

There’s much to like about “The Expendables,” especially the simple straight-forward plot, all the B-movie mayhem you could possibly ask for, and two unapologetic hours of masculinity – which may be two hours more than we’ve seen in all of the last decade put together. These boys smoke cigars, drink beer while piloting airplanes, and return us to those glorious pre-Oprah days when stoicism was still a virtue and real men didn’t gush about their inner-emotional lives like 13 year-old girls drunk on Dr. Pepper at a slumber party. There are also things to dislike, especially that evil shaky-cam which has done more to ruin a good time at the movies than liberal speechifying. John Sturges knew what a tri-pod was. Does anyone really think they can improve on Sturges?

Sylverster Stallone’s glorious throwback to the brawny 80s is also about something, and it’s not Bourne-ian self-discovery. It’s about something that actually matters. And in this age of nihilism when believing in anything bigger than self is considered old-fashioned, unsophisticated and naïve, that’s both refreshing and important. Mickey Rourke, who has a small but showy supporting role as the proprietor of the tattoo parlor that serves as the Expendables’ hangout, explains it with a single word. I won’t spoil anything, but without this scene, this important turning point, “The Expendables” wouldn’t be half the movie it is.

Stallone plays Barney Ross (probably not his real name), the leader of a band of American mercenaries who, along with Christmas (Jason Statham), Gunner (Dolph Lundgren), Yang (Jet Li), Toll (Randy Couture), and Caesar (Terry Crews), is willing to go most anywhere and kill most any bad guy for a price.

[This Just In]

This is what real testosterone films are made of. Not the kinder, gentler, girlie man, anti-hero murderer because his daddy or the federal government treated him badly kind of film.

[EveningStar]

ping

[ansel12]

I like John Nolte reviews and he is usually right.

[This Just In]

After reading this review, I would like to see the film.

[GOPsterinMA]

My review of ‘The Expendables’:

A cross between ‘The Dogs of War’, ‘Rambo 4’, ‘Commando’ and ‘Predator’.

Entertaining, but not as good as I thought it would be. Plenty of lead and blood. I give it a solid B - worth seeing, especially with the dearth of watchable films released so far in 2010.

I though Eric Roberts as the baddie was the best character in the film. Mickey Rourke was good too (as usual).

[Talisker]

There are also things to dislike, especially that evil shaky-cam which has done more to ruin a good time at the movies than liberal speechifying.

You want to really be freaked out? Compare a classic movie running on TCM today, with an old video tape (not DVD) of the same movie.

"They" have ADDED judder (Jitter and shudder and shake).

And also, they've ruined baseball by adding the same judder, bouncing, shaking camera work, especially pitcher shots from center field.

It's pure evil.

[This Just In]

Thanks for the take. We’ve seen three of the four you’ve mentioned, and liked ‘em all.

We just watched The Magnificent Seven. One of our favorite westerns, and an action film w/out the feminized fighters. Thankfully, no shaky cam.

[Hillarys Gate Cult]

I was waiting for Freeper reviews of this movie to see it as they've never done me wrong before.

Here's something that may be worth a look since there are a few Mystery Science Theater 3000 fans here. Thursday, August 19 they take on the cult classic “Reefer Madness” in theaters. It looks like a limited release.

http://www.fathomevents.com/comedy/event/rifftraxreeferlive.aspx

[Cyman]

Sorry but that was one of the most boring movies that I have seen in a long time. I would have fallen asleep but for the continuous meaningless gunfights and explosions. A solid C- in my book.

[thecodont]

Lots of snickers and loud guffaws in the theater after the scene with the cameo by the Governator.

[mountn man]

These boys smoke cigars, drink beer while piloting airplanes, and return us to those glorious pre-Oprah days when stoicism was still a virtue and real men didn’t gush about their inner-emotional lives like 13 year-old girls drunk on Dr. Pepper at a slumber party.

Ahem...

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Thankfully, one mans pleasure is another mans poison. :^)

[Mortrey]

Pile on the blood and guts....
Bury me in cigar smoke...

Matt Damon is the poster boy for twinkle-toes, girly-men.
THE “Pillsbury dough-boy”.

Blood, guts, cigar smoke, car crashes and violence can’t make this “twink” believable in a MAN’S role.

a fag is a fag is a fag....

I miss true men. There are so few of them......

[Domandred]

That damned shaky cam was originally caused by digital filming before processors could keep up with the action instead of good old celluloid.

Then there were films like Blair Witch and Cloverfield that were filmed mostly on hand held consumer grade camcorders. Those didn’t help at all.

Now they are doing it on purpose. Pisses me off.

[This Just In]

Roger that, mountn man.

I bet Stallone and Co. can actually pitch too.

[ansel12]

If you don’t know already, John Nolte is the guy that runs, or is editor of, or something, of this very good movie/Hollywood site.

http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/

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“Now they are doing it on purpose. Pisses me off.”

Ticks me off too. I can deal w/it in small doses, but to shoot most of a film using that cheap effect just diminishes the story.

[This Just In]

I visit Big Hollywood frequently for a conservative view on tinsel town. It’s always refreshing.

[This Just In]

Do you know why Damon doesn’t pack heat in Bourne Supremacy and Bourne Ultimatum? He didn’t want to use a gun. I guess it’s a kinder, gentler kind of mayhem and carnage.

“I miss true men. There are so few of them......”

Not where we come from, thank goodness.