[Yaelle]

a wife who is frustrated and hurt because her husband is rarely in the mood. But, as important and as destructive as that problem is, it has different causes and different solutions, and is therefore not addressed here.

Nor anywhere else. Ever. I am tired of being told that women don't have sex drives.

[goldstategop]

Men rarely lack a sex drive. If they have one and they can't control it - it causes them legal and psychological problems that are too well known to be elaborated here. Most men do control their sex drive their entire lives. It is asking too much of men to give it up completely, unless they live in a monastery. Male nature is at once gross and sublime and it becomes sublime in a union of true love with a woman where the carnality of the physical act is translated into something beautiful and touching that changes the soul. Which is precisely what no mere physical depiction of sex, such as in pornography for example, can ever convey to a man.

"Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached." - Manuel II Palelologus

[EBH]

I agree, his denial was the first prompting to start thinking of a divorce. To read this issue dismissed out of hand here is aggravating.

When it comes to sexual relations between a committed couple, it is important to both sexes to understand that denial is a serious dysfunction of the relationship.

[bikerman]

I am tired of being told that women don’t have sex drives.

You havent met my wife.

[Caramelgal]

Nor anywhere else. Ever. I am tired of being told that women don't have sex drives.

So true. A woman, unless she has some psychological or physical problem, does have a sex drive. While we are wired differently from men, we women think about it, fantasize about it, desire it and look forward to it. We want sex and we want great toe curling orgasms and we want to give the same to our husbands. We just don’t what to be treated like some blowup doll, an inanimate object or some “me soooo hoooorney, love you long time” whore, ready to go at a moment’s notice just because our man as a sudden urge.

There have been times when I was in no condition to have relations with my wife. But I have to tell you, I was driven to anyway. It baffles me to hear women talk about the deed as if it were a chore.

I’m not sure what you mean by “in no condition” but let me surmise a bit here, not that I’m saying this necessarily describes you ; ),. But were you ever (or any of you other guys here, and be honest about it), drunk, hung over, smelly, with bad breath, too tired or incapacitated for any foreplay or afterplay, stopping her in the middle of whatever she happened to be doing at the time and just jumping on her bones doing the deed only to fulfill your needs, then rolling off with out any thoughts of her needs, immediately falling asleep while she gets up and goes back to house work and cooking your meal while you lay there snoring in selfish post-coital bliss?

In a scenario like that it would baffle me not to hear a woman talking about the deed as if it were a chore.

Get a clue guys. It’s not always about you.

I do understand and sympathize with those men whose wives withhold sex. In the case of my nearly 20 year marriage however, it was not me but my husband who had a low and nearly non-existent libido. Believe me it was emotionally painful, frustrating and sometimes humiliating to be constantly rejected except on the rare occasions he was in the mood and it was a contributing factor in our divorce and so I do understand the importance of marital intimacy.

But I find it disturbing that so many men apparently see their wives as nothing more than an orifice in the waiting for their needs alone. With attitudes like that, some of you guys shouldn’t really be all that surprised that she isn’t all that interested anymore.

[The Brush]

They say that the thing you like most about a person is what you end up hating about them.
When I first met my ex I liked that she'd sleep with a stranger... then, after we were married...

[Lurker]

I am tired of being told that women don't have sex drives.

You should meet Mrs. L.

God I love that woman....

L

[La Enchiladita]

Dennis Prager is a male supremacist. He doesn’t have a clue.

[Twink]

Women have sex drives. I have a sex drive. I know quite a few friends, women, who don’t really care at all about making love/sex, etc. They hold it over their husbands heads as a reward for being “good” or doing what they want them to do, or whatever. And their husbands or some husbands have no clue about what any of it is all about.