People are single nowadays because they were raised in a culture of narcissism. Marraige requires responsibility and sacrifice.....two concepts that are anathema to modern culture.
"People are single nowadays because they were raised in a culture of narcissism. Marraige requires responsibility and sacrifice.....two concepts that are anathema to modern culture."
You also have to look at it from the point of view of those not married, and what they face with the prospects.
The women I meet are generally spoiled beyond control, and demand - yes demand - engagement rings that will put you in debt for decades. Then they demand the $50K wedding that takes a year to plan, driving everyone nuts, followed up by the $10-20K honeymoon to some idiotic "couple" resort, or the typical cliche Hawaii. Then, when you return, you are expected to buy the newest, biggest house in town, furnish it from the best of suppliers, and buy the newest, fanciest cars imaginable. All so your darling wife can lord it over everyone else.
Just the act of marrying these days can threaten to drain a man's bank account and put him in debt up to his eyeballs for years, if not decades. Men are to blame too, almost everyone I know lives beyond their means. Save money? Unheard of! I've dated women who started hinting around at week long vacations in Hawaai and such, and we'd only been dating a few weeks. I could afford to do that, but I'd have to save for a while, but they expect me to just throw it on a credit card.
In fact, many of the women I date are shocked and get quite chilly when I tell them i ripped up my credit cards and shut down the accounts, and don't plan on getting any new ones.
And heaven help you if you start dating someone near Valentine's Day - even casual dates now seem to expect diamonds and such. I'm sorry, but I need to be in a commited relationship, with some hope of it lasting, before I go there. I watch my friends drop hundreds on diamonds and flowers and candy and dinnder for V-day, and what do they get? Maybe a card. Maybe sex.
Feh. Dating is all about how much you spend on them these days. I HATE being measured like that - I'm very generous with my trusted friends, but I will not be a chump like that.
Then, you are expected to jump into the rat race and push as hard as you can for more money, all of the time, work the hours necessary, and still put in full time duty at home raising the kids, taking care of the million dollar McMansion, cooking, cleaning, and giving her as much "space" and "my time" as her whims desire. If you're good, you can watch the occasional football game, or play golf. Hobbies, dreams, desires, goals? Forget them, unless SHE approves, and they cater to her whim.
I know it's not all like that, but that's what I've seen my friends get trapped into year after year after year. Marriage for a lot of women these days is not so much a partnership to have and raise kids, but a guaranteed serf in the home who you can throw out on a whim, and never make a single sacrifice. (Yes, i know there are bad men too). Dating is just as bad. I've heard women tearing their boyfriends up because they did'nt spend enough on them, and their freinds telling them to dump him, and find someone who isn't "cheap".
Feh!
I'm looking for an old fashioned girl who knows that when you start out together, you may not have much, but you help each other get the things you want, who measures me by who I am, not what I spend. I'm tired of everything being about how much money you spend, and how expensive your toys are.
Here in CA, dealing with the women who were raised middle class or wealthy have expectations and demands of marriage and men that are pure fantasy, and impossible - but they'll make everyone around them miserable trying to get it.
I havent given up hope, but I know my search will be long and hard to find a good woman, and I've given up hope finding her in California. Even the transplants succumb to the spell eventually, and are ruined. For the time being, single is a much better existence than signing on teh dotted line for the insanity that the average woman offers a man these days.
Get over it you Luddites.
It's NOT about the chillrun anymore there are enough people on this planet to insure survival of the species until we turn into biomechanical drones born in factories.
BUMP
Not only that, but, marriage and being parents of children requires responsibility and sacrifice. I'd go as far as to say that even some married folks capable of being good parents choose not to have kids because they don't want to raise kids in a narcissistic culture...I can't say I blame them.