Quite laughable commentary.
One could point to military victories of the empires of Napoleon, Hitler, etc., and claim superiority...yet Lincoln's destruction of the Constitution by was unsurpassed, regardless of military outcomes of his regime.
BTW, over Thanksgiving, I visited the graves of a few of my ancestors who fought in blue. Their commanders weren't the greatest, placing them in a position exposed on three sides and leading to an 80% casualty rate for their regiment.
Slavery was bad, but that wasn't really so high on Lincoln's mind til it served him. Lincoln's initial response to adversity--ordering one state to attack another--was not only horrific, but rather "anti-union" in itself!
Once the states came together to form a union, they gave up their right to secede from that union. To do so would constitute an act of rebellion. Lincoln did not "destroy" the Constitution in the process of preserving the Union. He freed 3.5 millions of people from bondage and also kept this country from further disintegration. How long do you think the CSA would have hung together had they won the war? The Union would have been more prone to fracture along regional lines following a defeat, as well. America today above the Rio Grande might look more like Latin America during its hayday of military juntas and coups d'tate.
I am sorry for your loss.
I met a Yankee preacher in Kentucky during Thanksgiving. Wish to God there were more like him.