I want them converted too...
Posted on 08/30/2006 6:35:59 PM PDT by blam
Pinocchio and friends converted to Islam
Malcolm Moore in Antalya
(Filed: 31/08/2006)
Pinocchio, Tom Sawyer and other characters have been converted to Islam in new versions of 100 classic stories on the Turkish school curriculum.
"Give me some bread, for Allah's sake," Pinocchio says to Geppetto, his maker, in a book stamped with the crest of the ministry of education.
"Thanks be to Allah," the puppet says later.
In The Three Musketeers, D'Artagnan is told that he cannot visit Aramis. The reason would surprise the author, Alexandre Dumas.
An old woman explains: "He is surrounded by men of religion. He converted to Islam after his illness."
Tom Sawyer may always have shirked his homework, but he is more conscientious in learning his Islamic prayers. He is given a "special treat" for learning the Arabic words.
Pollyanna, seen by some as the embodiment of Christian forgiveness, says that she believes in the end of the world as predicted in the Koran.
Heidi, the Swiss orphan girl in the tale by Johanna Spyri, is told that praying to Allah will help her to relax.
Several more books have been altered, including La Fontaine's fables and Victor Hugo's Les Miserables.
The clumsy insertions by Islamic publishing houses have caused controversy in Turkey, which has been a strongly secular state since the 1920s.
Other books contain insults, slang and rude rhymes which mock the president and the prime minister.
Recep Tayyip Erdogan, who is Turkey's first Islamic premier, has called for swift action to be taken against the publishers.
The education ministry has threatened to take legal action against any publisher which continues to issue such books.
Huseyin Celik, the education minister, said: "If there are slang and swear words, we will sue them for using the ministry logo."
Whew, thanks! I could have had my hands chopped off for that.
I want them converted too...
Larry, Mohammed, and Curly
"Married, With Martyrs"
"Have Boxcutter, Will Travel"
"I Dream Of Jihad"
"Leave It To Basheer"
"The Destroyed Zionist Love Boat"
Jack and Jill went up the hill
To fetch a pail of Uranium
Jack fell down and broke his cranium
And Jill brings to his grave a Geranium
Knowing Mad Mo's (rumored) penchant for buggery and children, I shudder to think of what Tom's "special treat" was.
Because Allah provides no inspiration at all. Creativity doesn't come from thin air.
(golf clap)
Little Miss Muffet
sat on a tuffet,
eating her couscous and honey,
she reached for a tater,
'twas the detonator,
and now she's a virgin for money.
They will be changed to the three little goats, and the evil Zionist wolf will come to blow down their tents. But before the wolf can blow down the third tent, (because there is no time to make bricks) the third goat straps on a suicide vest and blows up his lair.
"I Dream of Jihad" was the best.
How about:
"My Three Wives."
"Allah Knows Best."
"Welcome Back to Qatar."
"Good Times (with C4)"
"All Arabian Hero."
"Night Camel Rider"
There once was a premier named Erdogan,
He took bribes from the Saudis as fast as you can,
in exchange for sharia law,
he destoyed being secular,
and now women are beaten on beaches.
"Trick My Camel"
"Three Arabs and a Goat"
"Three's a Jihad"
"Trading Tents"
"Mohammad Knows Best"
LMAO
Does Pinocchio's nose grow when he reads the Koran out loud?
Well done! I hadn't considered Snow White as a male. Now the good little chilluns can be properly educated.
Wow! Don't ever let these people read the originals. They might be in for a shock.
Pinocchio was a bad little block of wood from the beginning.
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