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Handy Man Special: Major Fixer Upper Property Available in Hibhib, Iraq
DFU
| 6-10-06
| Doug from Upland
Posted on 06/10/2006 5:53:24 PM PDT by doug from upland
MOHAMMED ABDULA, Real Estate Broker
ABDULA REAL ESTATE proudly presents a new listing in the quaint village of Hibhib, Iraq
FIXER UPPER SPECIAL . . . MOTIVATED SELLER
MLS NO. - 25132H
ASKING PRICE ONLY 43,000 Dinar
PROPERTY FEATURES
* 3 bedrooms, 1 bath * open and airy * improving neighborhood
* easy commuting distance to Baghdad
* lots of palm trees * close to Bush Elementary School
* great views from inside the house
* this home would cost 1,500,000,000 Dinar in California
* safe neighborhood thanks to U.S. military
* property is vacant and available for fast closing and immediate occupancy
SPECIAL NOTE: buyer beware on this property. It is being sold in "AS-IS" condition and the buyer is expected to hire his own professional to conduct an independent evaluation of its condition.
OWNER DISCLOSURE (Disclosure prepared by relatives; owner is deceased):
ROOF: missing
WALLS: missing
FLOORS: missing
CEILINGS: missing
PLUMBING: missing
WINDOWS: missing
DOORS: missing
HEATING: missing
AIR CONDITIONING: missing
ADDITIONAL COMMENTS: The property recently had something very large fall on it. There still remains a slight odor of goat urine, but a little elbow grease and Mr. Clean should take care of that. There is also a considerable amount of blood. This is a rare opportunity for a smart investor.
TERMS: Cash, cash to new loan, owner will carry, creative exchange, lease option.
COMMISSION: 4% to selling agent; for a full price offer, selling agent will also receive a bonus of his choice of 3 goats or a trip to the United States to see an American Idol concert
TOPICS: Your Opinion/Questions
KEYWORDS: alzarqawi; iraq; virgintime; waronterror
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To: Brilliant
Didn't the photo show for you?
21
posted on
06/10/2006 6:32:12 PM PDT
by
doug from upland
(Stopping Hillary should be a FreeRepublic Manhattan Project)
To: doug from upland
22
posted on
06/10/2006 6:34:18 PM PDT
by
jazusamo
(DIANA IREY for Congress, PA 12th District: Retire murtha.)
To: fishtank; All
23
posted on
06/10/2006 6:35:16 PM PDT
by
doug from upland
(Stopping Hillary should be a FreeRepublic Manhattan Project)
To: doug from upland
You are soooooooo bad! LOLOL!!
24
posted on
06/10/2006 6:36:20 PM PDT
by
tiredoflaundry
(Zarqawi is pining for the fiords.)
To: doug from upland
25
posted on
06/10/2006 6:40:28 PM PDT
by
doug from upland
(Stopping Hillary should be a FreeRepublic Manhattan Project)
To: doug from upland
Aw, now, y'know all that stuff ain't missing. It's all there, it's just sort of all mixed together.
A full-featured Iraqi hut
Is available - prices are cut
It does have a small mark,
Where our good buddy Zark
Took a quarter-ton bomb up the butt.
To: Billthedrill
27
posted on
06/10/2006 7:12:49 PM PDT
by
doug from upland
(Stopping Hillary should be a FreeRepublic Manhattan Project)
To: Billthedrill
His wasting of oxygen ceases
Let's watch as the terror decreases
So the scum is now dead
On his gravestone it said
Zarqawi, may he rest in pieces
28
posted on
06/10/2006 7:17:47 PM PDT
by
doug from upland
(Stopping Hillary should be a FreeRepublic Manhattan Project)
To: doug from upland
To: doug from upland
I just love a house with skylights..........If the owner will take 3,000 dinar off the asking price for new carpet and tree removal I will take the property as is....LOL
30
posted on
06/10/2006 7:39:37 PM PDT
by
conservativeammom
(Granny to Benjamin.....Born 4-21-05)
To: doug from upland
No Video Tour? You're getting cheap, Doug.
31
posted on
06/10/2006 8:57:38 PM PDT
by
Hoosier-Daddy
(It's a fight to the death with Democrats.)
To: Hoosier-Daddy
I would guess that expecting referrals would be out of the question.
32
posted on
06/10/2006 9:00:11 PM PDT
by
Hoosier-Daddy
(It's a fight to the death with Democrats.)
To: Hoosier-Daddy
Oops, my bad, we already had an F-16 video tour.
33
posted on
06/10/2006 9:01:16 PM PDT
by
Hoosier-Daddy
(It's a fight to the death with Democrats.)
To: Darksheare; NoCmpromiz
34
posted on
06/10/2006 9:17:48 PM PDT
by
DJ MacWoW
(If you think you know what's coming next....You don't know Jack.)
To: doug from upland
I half expected to see this listed on eBay!
35
posted on
06/11/2006 1:11:34 PM PDT
by
Gondring
(If "Conservatives" now wants to "conserve" our Constitution away, then I must be a Preservative!)
To: Gondring
I thought about putting it up on eBay but I don't want to lose my status there and p*ss them off because it is not mine to sell.
36
posted on
06/11/2006 1:17:11 PM PDT
by
doug from upland
(Stopping Hillary should be a FreeRepublic Manhattan Project)
To: doug from upland
They dropped a second satellite-guided bomb "to ensure the target set was serviced appropriately", an air force general said. We can still count on the military for top-notch customer service!
Duely serviced!
37
posted on
06/11/2006 1:17:33 PM PDT
by
Fruitbat
(I)
To: Baynative
Don't be surprised if MoveOn.org takes up a collection to make it into a museum! Rather a shrine or memorial.
38
posted on
06/11/2006 1:18:52 PM PDT
by
Fruitbat
(I)
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