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The trouble with boys
http://www.startribune.com/562/story/457984.html ^ | May 28, 2006 | Leonard Sax

Posted on 05/29/2006 6:17:29 PM PDT by rhema

I n the romantic comedy "Failure to Launch," Matthew McConaughey plays a young man who is affable, intelligent, good-looking -- and completely unmotivated. He still lives at home and seems to have no ambitions beyond playing video games, hanging out with buddies and having sex. In desperation, his parents hire a professional motivation consultant, played by Sarah Jessica Parker, who pretends to fall in love with McConaughey's character to motivate him to grow up and get a life.

I was struck by how this theme matches what I see in my office with greater and greater frequency; a son goes off to college for a year or two, wastes thousands of dollars of his parents' money, then gets bored and comes back to live in his old room. Now he's working part time at Kinko's or part time at Starbucks.

It is a phenomenon that is getting a lot of media attention as part of the so-called "boy crisis" and one that cuts across all demographics -- rich, poor, black, white, urban and rural. According to the Census Bureau, one-third of young men ages 22 to 34 are still living at home with their parents -- a roughly 100 percent increase in the past 20 years. That is not true of young women. Why?

Before growing into unmotivated young adults, boys are more likely than girls to be diagnosed with ADHD, be in remedial classes and become dropouts. Boys are now significantly less likely than girls to go to college.

(Excerpt) Read more at startribune.com ...


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Editorial; US: Minnesota
KEYWORDS: adulthood; males
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To: SamAdams76

If we are going to go anecdotal, I have two daughters who went to college, got their degrees, worked for a living for a while, got married, and are bringing up two children each. There are examples both ways.


61 posted on 05/29/2006 7:43:44 PM PDT by expatpat
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To: SauronOfMordor
"At our company, EVERY SINGLE EMPLOYEE in the HR dept is female. I don't think this is unusual these days"

No, it is very common these days. But every single one of those company's will be sold or bankrupt within 3 years!
62 posted on 05/29/2006 7:45:32 PM PDT by Beagle8U (Juan Williams....The DNC's "Crash test Dummy" for talking points.)
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To: Leatherneck_MT

"They are being taught by the leftist NOW loving trash in this country, that being male is wrong, and if you are a white male you are 3 times as wrong." Yes, and they are being taught that same thing once again by the leftie feminzais on the college campuses (as part of orientation).

Just MAYBE they are voting to preserve their testosterone and NOT pay tuition for that c-rap. Our son described the brain-washing in hilarious detail with plenty of eye-rolling. At the University he choses to not return to next fall. Hurray for the guys.


63 posted on 05/29/2006 7:49:54 PM PDT by bboop (Stealth Tutor)
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To: rhema

My nephew would be one of these young men. He's dropped out of college and is living at home.

However, I will cut him some slack. His father died less than 2 years ago of cancer. He's also had some health problems (broke his ankle and did something to his shoulder).

Hopefully, my nephew can get on with his life soon. He's a nice kid.


64 posted on 05/29/2006 7:54:58 PM PDT by luckystarmom
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To: Leatherneck_MT

"Past time for Dads to stand up and refute this crap, take their boys hunting, fishing, racing, whatever and counteract this BS they are being taught."

A lot of dads nowadays are absolute wimps. My neighbor was raised up hunting and fishing and when I asked him why he doesn't hunt now he said his (lefty, school teacher) wife won't let him keep any firearms. My wife and I settled that a long time ago when we got married. I won't put up with that BS for a minute.


65 posted on 05/29/2006 7:55:56 PM PDT by dljordan
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To: RedBeaconNY

Actually, it advocates single-sex classrooms where lessons are taught the way boys or girls learn.


66 posted on 05/29/2006 7:58:40 PM PDT by luckystarmom
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To: SamAdams76

I'm a woman with two sisters. We all left home and never looked back, went to college on the cheap, work hard, care for our families, and are smarter than our husbands but we love them anyway and never let them know it.

We had and still have a great Dad. (and Mom, but the Dad is really important with daughters).

I'm *really* hoping you don't let your disdain for women rub off on your sons. There really are some good ones out there.


67 posted on 05/29/2006 8:02:24 PM PDT by agrarianlady
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To: rhema

"He still lives at home and seems to have no ambitions beyond playing video games, hanging out with buddies and having sex."

Didn't anyone writing about this movie really see it?

He may have still lived at home, but he sold yachts and drove a Porsche, for gosh sakes!


68 posted on 05/29/2006 8:09:55 PM PDT by chaosagent (Remember, no matter how you slice it, forbidden fruit still tastes the sweetest!)
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To: rhema

I'd rather read the state building code than anything by Morrison. My daughter had to read "The Bluest Eye" - what a depressing piece!


69 posted on 05/29/2006 8:10:03 PM PDT by knittnmom (...surrounded by reality)
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To: RedBeaconNY

I thought it was a well written and thoughtful article. It does offer a partial solution - single sex classrooms.

FYI:
"Cirriculums" is an accepted plural form for "cirriculum" (My Webster's dictionary).


70 posted on 05/29/2006 8:15:19 PM PDT by Francis McClobber
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To: Melas

I'm pretty sure he's not referring to Hemingway and Steinbeck - but to Morrison and the other authors mentioned.


71 posted on 05/29/2006 8:25:59 PM PDT by knittnmom (...surrounded by reality)
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To: Fairview

"with a son you only have to worry about one penis; with a daughter you have to worry about three billion penises."

LOL! I never heard that one before. It is true though.


72 posted on 05/29/2006 8:34:35 PM PDT by jocon307 (The Silent Majority - silent no longer)
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To: Leatherneck_MT

jarhead, you are right!!

It starts before Kindergarten, in day care. Boys need to be allowed to be boys. When they are not, they lose interest. We have to get the control of public education out of the hands of the women's movement.


73 posted on 05/29/2006 8:40:08 PM PDT by David Allen (the presumption of innocence - what a concept!)
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To: NavVet
Yeah, but what is the plural of moose?

Uh, a bunch of moose?

74 posted on 05/29/2006 8:50:29 PM PDT by SuziQ
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To: Beagle8U

It's "diir".

:^)


75 posted on 05/29/2006 8:53:53 PM PDT by Disambiguator (Unfettered gun ownership is the highest expression of civil rights.)
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To: rhema
Now the challenge is to use our new understanding of boys and girls to broaden educational options, customize learning to individual children and move beyond the gender wars...thank goodness after years and years of theorizing and studies we finally have arrived at the new understanding that boys and girls are different......
76 posted on 05/29/2006 9:00:07 PM PDT by Intolerant in NJ
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To: Lady Jag

yeah....

I mean it isn't as if I was staying there longer than I had too.

More or less I stopped in for dinner once or twice a week and did my laundry.

Half of the time I didn't even sleep there :)

Yes I regret it too.


77 posted on 05/29/2006 9:12:35 PM PDT by MikefromOhio (aka MikeinIraq - WTFO)
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To: Beagle8U
No, it is very common these days. But every single one of those company's will be sold or bankrupt within 3 years!

Rubbish, my sister is an HR director at a very large hotel, in charge of thousands of employees. She has saved her company millions in the decade she has been working there. In fact, she just received a promotion to supervise the HR directors at all of her chain's other hotels in the Western US.

And let me tell you, she just rolls her eyes at the multi-culti crap those in her profession have to put up with. She is definitely not a bleeding heart liberal, and in private she can hold forth with extremely politically incorrect and irreverent humor about the on-the-job performance of every ethnic and cultural group.

Obviously she has to give everyone a fair shot at a job, and keep quotas of various underprivileged groups high enough to satisfy the Federal melanin police, but long and bitter experience has taught her much about the origin of stereotypes.

-ccm

78 posted on 05/29/2006 9:40:46 PM PDT by ccmay (Too much Law; not enough Order)
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To: rhema
He still lives at home and seems to have no ambitions beyond playing video games, hanging out with buddies and having sex.

Cows, free milk, etc.

-ccm

79 posted on 05/29/2006 9:41:46 PM PDT by ccmay (Too much Law; not enough Order)
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To: ccmay
I've never worked in a hotel, perhaps a personnel manager that is female would be a perfect fit in that environment.
80 posted on 05/29/2006 10:31:16 PM PDT by Beagle8U (Juan Williams....The DNC's "Crash test Dummy" for talking points.)
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