No slinky model here, in fact - no 'slinky'!!
Posted on 03/18/2006 7:03:00 PM PST by goldstategop
The miracle of Purim owes much to a superficial, womanizing male who set about dating as many women as possible to find the one that was the most beautiful. Ahasuerus is like so many shallow men today who reduce women to nothing but a slim figure and a pretty face. But in the end, the story of Esther makes it clear that the secretly Jewish queen was chosen not for her looks, but because she "found grace and favor" in the eyes of all who beheld her. There was a womanly dignity, a sublime feminine majesty, to Esther that the rest of the harem lacked. They were empty suits, packaging only, without substance or personality. They were the kind of women who attract attention with low-cut blouses rather than high intelligence, short skirts rather than a lofty spirit. But Esther is a woman possessed both of outer and inner beauty, a heroine who exhibits uncommon wisdom, courage and dedication to the helpless. In short, she is a woman of outstanding character and her story is that of the triumph not only of the Jews over their enemies, but also of a woman's ability to win over a man with her brains rather than her bust.
How tragic, therefore, that Jewish men today have adopted the dating mores of Ahasuerus. And I'm not just talking about secular Jewish men whom we might expect to have adopted less lofty criteria in their choice of a mate. Rather, I am speaking especially of Orthodox Jewish men who have become so obsessed with the three modern virtues of a real woman - large chest, long legs, slim figure - that heart, mind, even the sparkle of her eyes, count for almost nothing.
I once served as matchmaker-in-chief for JDate. But I now find matchmaking nauseating thanks to the dispiriting superficiality of today's Jewish men. I now know that the countless men who tell me how desperate they are to find a really nice girl are lying through their teeth because what they really mean is a woman who looks like a model. At my weekly Sabbath table, where I host many singles, I watch as the men immediately dismiss even the most interesting women with the warmest hearts if they lack a bombshell body.
If she's short, she's out, and if she's overweight, well, that's the kiss of death. I'll set up men with women who I know to be attractive and charming, only to have the guy call me back the next day and complain of a lack of chemistry, by which he always means, "She wasn't pretty enough." The poor woman never had a chance. Before she opened her mouth, her body did her in.
BUT WHY would we expect anything different? Superficial people seek superficial qualities, and men today are about as deep as a crack in the sidewalk. They have been given one criterion for success, money, and they use that money as a commodity to purchase a woman's chief commodity, her physical beauty. Today's religious men are trained to appreciate little else.
I know a 20-year-old Jewish girl who developed a dangerous eating disorder because her very religious parents told her that unless she lost weight the type of yeshiva student they wanted her to marry would not take her out.
But weren't Jewish men, especially Orthodox ones, supposed to be different? The nation that gave the world's Solomon's Ode to a Woman of Valor, where a woman's God-fearing qualities are what make her beautiful, have betrayed that ideal utterly. If you are a woman in the Jewish singles scene who isn't stunningly attractive, you're going to wait a long time to get married. And once you're married, you better keep your looks up, because the women who are going to be praying with you in the ladies' section spend five hours in the gym for every hour they spend in the synagogue. They're not fools. They know that their husbands are trained to appreciate muscle tone rather than piety. And don't have more than two children, even though we need as many Jewish babies as possible, because kids will make your figure go to hell and your breasts droop almost as far.
NEVER believed that I would witness a time when even marriage-minded, Orthodox men would become womanizers, giving themselves the latitude to date as many women as possible so that they can find "the best." In yeshiva I was taught one did not date a woman the way one shopped for a car. Rather, you focused on one woman completely and tried to develop a soulful connection with her without worrying about what else might be out there.
Recently, I had a young rabbinical student of marriageable age at my home. He told me he had already dated 40 girls and had not found what he was looking for. I was stunned. "Forty nice, religious girls, and not one of them was good enough for you?"
But anyone familiar with the increasingly toxic shidduch system among the ultra-Orthodox knows that what many young men are looking for is anathema to Jewish values, namely, looks, money and pedigree. Find all three and you have hit the jackpot. Find only one, or even two, and you have "to settle."
Now, no doubt, in the secular world marrying money and marrying into an important family are also important. But when religious Jews marry for materialistic and ego-driven values, they degrade a glorious spiritual tradition.
It is high time that rabbis started giving sermons from the pulpit exhorting single men in the congregation to be gentlemen and reward women for developing the traits that Judaism truly values like compassion, wisdom and goodness. While physical attraction is always important in marriage - both for men and for women - Jewish leaders must begin inspiring future husbands to judge their wives' attractiveness by considerations beyond flesh alone. For if we fail, we'll continue seeing Jewish women feeling permanently insecure about their "imperfect bodies" rather than taking pride in their generous spirits.
Thanks hon.....and yes I'm trying to forget
i have almost gotten too old for babe threads i'm afraid
that really sux
The girl has obvious fake boobs. Remove the makeup and airbrushing in that photo and what are you left with? A person with faults like everyone else.
Amazing article and definitely of universal application. A must read article, thanks for posting it!
And the external beauty always, always fades, and the fear of fading is a constant source of anxiety for all concerned.
What's really beautiful is the expression of the soul that pours through the eyes. All else fades like mist in the sun. When you love someone, you see beauty that no one else does. Because I love my better half, I see beauty that is not damaged by gray hair or lines in the face. That's the beauty of the soul - the real person.
but they do that for each other...I swear...not sapphos...quite the contrary....women like to noticed by men fer shore but they know their looks are judged not by men but by WOMEN!
AMEN, at least that goes for the non-American born ones.
I was only speaking of personalities and and ease of cohabitation, but the study I have sampled is small. The weight thing is a personal choice issue that transcends race, imo.
Which still tilts against them in the superficial debate.
hello......?
There were some Latin women I shoulda married instead of my ex but the time was wrong.
It all works out in the end....God's plan I guess. I wish the same for everyone....a good spouse and lotsa yardbirds.
I wish I was king.....that Prima Noctra thing would be interesting..lol
She looks more like a hillbilly chick to me.
And if that is her body in college athletic form, then she is going to have some real problems in a bit in not turning into a big girl.
What is her name, I will do some scientific research on the web and see if other pictures make her look different.
Do I sense a dollop of hostility there? Are you saying fat chicks are demanding as well as beauty-challenged?
Heaven knows, I do. ;-)
Yardbirds...There's a new one!
DISCUSSION ABOUT:
"Shallow Men And The Women Who Suffer (The Male Lust For The Supermodel Perfect Mate Alert)l"
This is a must read!
To be included in or removed from the MORAL ABSOLUTES PINGLIST, please FreepMail wagglebee.
My wife will wear something she knows I'm not crazy about if she thinks other women will like it.
For the record....she is not a fashion model....petite....sorta Reece Witherspoon sized
my tallest flame was 5'9" and I'm 6'5"
never really picked em out....it just happened but I probably did lean petite..and they like big guys...I think anyhow
The Mexican women in California have a tendency to become obese in almost all cases. Especially those who tend to be more Indian than Spanish.
There is the occasional stunning older latin woman who stayed in shape, but they are the acception.
As far as beauty, while young they are stunning, but most go blimp at marriage almost over night or get chunky no matter what they do because it seems they mostly don't care.
I think Mexican women in general running around California have by far had the highest amount of obesity and love handles in even their early twenties.
Diet? Cultural? Genetic? Bush's fault? I don't know.
No slinky model here, in fact - no 'slinky'!!
LMAO!
That picture is just shameless!
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