Question for Pro-Lifers (What Would you do in this case ?)

[SirLinksalot]

After several months in this forum, I have never posted a vanity post before and this will be my first time, but I am posting this to find out whether anyone can help me find some moral direction on a life choice dilemma which is not different from the Terry Schiavo case...

I have a friend in Texas who was taking high blood medicine not knowing she was pregnant.

Very early in the pregnancy they took tests and were told that their baby will practically have no brain but being devout christians, they decided to go thru anyway.

Last week their baby was born and as predicted, without a brain but somehow she's breathing and "alive".

Now the parents are having second thoughts and just waiting for her to stop breathing and die.

What would be the most moral thing to do in this situation ?

Thanks for your feedback.

[eleni121]

Note: If what I said sounds too preachy, evangelical or Puritanical...I still mean it. Beacause Life is of OUR GOD and HE has a Special Purpose for this young one.
...................................................
Halellujah!

[BykrBayb]

If you decide to share these posts with her parents, I suggest you delete any insensitve remarks. That hasn't been an issue, until now.

[Brad’s Gramma]

Tell that to my young niece and her husband who held their child for only a day or so before the Lord took him home...they COULD have opted for the abortion route but were appalled at the thought of killing that child.

[BykrBayb]

Some people talk about a dying child the way the rest of talk about rotting food in the fridge. I pity those people.

[trisham]

Some options are objectively immoral. A concerned friend would point this out.

*************

I agree. Furthermore, a good friend will realize that the wrong decision may lead to a lifetime of regret and guilt.

[DallasMike]

So, it's basically "illegal without consequences". Do you think that would go over well with pro-life people here? :)

Many of us pro-lifers are willing to take an incremental approach. If abortion were only allowed in the case of rape, incest, or to save the life of the mother, almost 98% of abortions would be eliminated. I suspect that when Roe v. Wade is overturned, some states will begin to take this approach, especially the red states.

[Small-L]

Our paths have crossed before. As always, I treasure and respect your philosopy and intellect.

None of us can possibly address "the most moral" thing to do!!!!

Unfortunately, there are many in FR and elsewhere who insist on imposing their view of morality, their view of what is right and wrong for the whole world, and who never shirk their "duty" to tell the rest of us not just what we should do, but what we must do. They are not satisfied to preach their view of morality on Sunday, but seek to use the police powers of the government to impose that view on the unwilling or unwashed. For myself and my family, I believe abortion is wrong, but I'm not so arrogant and self-righteous that I believe that I should be dictating my beliefs to others. I am also confident enough in my own religion and beliefs that I don't feel I need to go about converting others to my view.

As you say, "THEY, with the support of the baby's doctor and the help of their pastor or priest, must decide..." As outsiders, our role should be to support the parents in whatever choices they make, and to pray for them and for their child.

[JTN]

It's not an abortion.

[JTN]

The poster asked a question. He wouldn't have done so if he wanted to hear from only one side.

[BykrBayb]

She's a baby, not an "it." His description of the parents leads me to believe that they aren't likely to appreciate being advised to just forget about "it." Do you have any advice that might actually be helpful or comforting for them?

[Brad’s Gramma]

I was referring to my niece. She knew early on that her son would be born defective, and would either die during birth or a few hours after. God gave them more than a few hours.

For HER, yes, it would have been an abortion.

This would be...what? I can't even say what I want to say. Other than we're gonna have to agree to disagree.

[JTN]

She's a baby, not an "it." His description of the parents leads me to believe that they aren't likely to appreciate being advised to just forget about "it."

You might have a point if I had used the term it, which I did not.

[lugsoul]

"with chop shops everywhere"

That is a wild exaggeration, and I suspect you know it.

You are in TX? Why don't you tell us how many 'chop shops' are located within 200 miles of, say, Waco.

How many are in the entire state of Mississippi?

How many in Georgia that are NOT in Atlanta?

'Chop shops,' as you put it, are really quite rare.

[DBeers]

Unfortunately, there are many in FR and elsewhere who insist on imposing their view of morality, their view of what is right and wrong for the whole world, and who never shirk their "duty" to tell the rest of us not just what we should do, but what we must do

I have noted this too -especially on this thread that asks for moral opinions of pro-lifers. Very odd to see all these pro-life moral opinions posted -very odd?

[lugsoul]

Not to pry, but I think this is important - could your wife's doctor do it, or did y'all have to go to a clinic?

[BykrBayb]

You talked about her like she was an "it." Do you think you could step back from yourself long enough to realize that her parents aren't repulsed by her and looking for a way to walk away from her? Any ideas on how they can make the most of the time they have with her? Or do you honestly believe there's no point in them bothering?

[lastchance]

Give pallative care and if the doctor's say that being home would make no difference in the lifespan of the baby take the child home to love it for as long as possible.

[silverleaf]

If you ever lost a child you would know that they already face a lifetime of guilt and regret.

If you ever lost a child you would know that the people you remember as being your best friends did not try to make you feel "guilty" for wanting to do something a clueless "friend" opined to be "immoral".

A good friend recognizes that she is helpless to understand what they are thinking unless her own child has died, and a friend who owns this wisdom will never presume to lecture or advise on matters of morality during the death watch.

Whatever you think is a "moral option", they already know. What options they may be mulling in their hearts you will never know unless you live their experience. But they would never wish that on a good friend, or even an enemy.

A good friend would never want to say something that adds to the pain of grieving parents, perhaps for the rest of their lives. Many are the "good friends" who drive nails in hearts that are already broken, and many are the moralist lecturers who damage grieving parents' faith in God. As evidence, visit the many child grief forums where religion cannot even be discussed because of the damage and anger caused to many of those parents by well-meaning but clueless presumptive Hallmark card remarks about "God's plan" and "God wanted another angel" and "She's in a better place now"....and yada yada yada.

A good friend respects that their friends must walk this road alone, with God and with their pastor to advise them.
A good friend will cry with them, hold them wordlessly, and talk about their beautiful child with them...by her name. A good friend will send them cards every year for the rest of their lives on their child's birthday and death day.

[DBeers]

Why keep repeating your position that it is best to say nothing? Be a good friend to the pro-life FR members and say nothing more...

[silverleaf]

Because I lost a child and I network every day with mothers who have lost children and I often do my best to heal their faith in God that has been damaged by clueless moralists.

And I feel a strong need to spread the word and tell the OP to butt out. Presuming he is a best friend.

Now, if you have selected clothes for your child to wear in his coffin and put a toy in his hands before they closed the lid, and then laid on the dirt over his grave the night of burial to keep the rain off....then we can talk some more.