Posted on 11/29/2005 6:01:20 PM PST by Nomorjer Kinov
When the Firm Foundation Worship Center got the call that a family of nine escaping Hurricane Katrina had arrived in Westminster needing a house, church members jumped into action.
"They came here with nothing," said Marge DiMaggio, the church's co-pastor.
As quickly as possible, church members made a house on church property look like a home.
When the Brown family left on Sunday, the DiMaggios were horrified to find the house in shambles.
"Hurricane hits Firm Foundation," said Marge DiMaggio.
While answering the call in September, church members' hearts were filled with compassion for the unknown family.
"We brought our pillows over," said Marge DiMaggio, so the family could sleep well the first night.
The church laid new carpet donated by Altieri Builders, redid the bathrooms, found appliances and even hung curtains to make the old-fashioned white-frame house welcoming to the family.
They bought clothes, assembled beds out of mattresses donated by the Westminster Rescue Mission and stocked the pantry with food.
The Browns paid no rent and no utilities for the house.
On Sunday, the DiMaggios entered the house after church, at about 1 p.m., said Marge DiMaggio's son, Brian DiMaggio. The Browns left during church services, between 11 and noon, he said.
A lamp was smashed on the floor, the lampshade stomped.
The screen door was torn off the hinges and flung onto the back deck.
Someone cut a hole in the trampoline that belonged to Joann DiMaggio's children.
Curtain rods were ripped from the wall and left bent and dangling from one screw.
Clothing, potato chip bags, soda cans, socks and empty bags were strewn throughout the house.
A hole was punched in a bathroom wall.
In another bathroom, dried toothpaste was smeared on the vanity, a capless toothpaste tube on the windowsill above.
A big, broken pink plastic car was abandoned on the hill outside the house.
In a dirty refrigerator upstairs, someone left a coffee mug with an inch or two layer of coffee sludge in the bottom.
Dirty dishes were stacked in the sink or on the counters.
But in perhaps the biggest insult, the words "MD Sucks" were emblazoned in black paint on the side of the home.
"When our eyes caught this, we all stood here and froze," Marge DiMaggio said.
Unhappy in Maryland
According to 42-year-old Keith Brown, who with his wife and children was halfway back to their home state of Louisiana, the property was not misused.
"We cleaned up as much as we could," he said.
He denied painting "MD Sucks" on the side of the house. His wife denied knowledge of any vandalism.
Yet Brown, whose family was referred to the church by Home Services Resources of Westminster, admitted to being unhappy during his stay here.
"We had a lot of problems with people about the house," he said.
The DiMaggios would come in and sneak around when the family was out, he said. The DiMaggios would tell them they needed to clean up this and that.
"Living in that environment and having someone watching over your shoulder wasn't worth crap," he said.
Marge and Joann DiMaggio were stunned at Brown's angry response to their generosity.
"The house was so fresh two months ago," said Marge DiMaggio. "We didn't check up on them," she said. "We didn't lord over them. We had no idea."
A few times early on they did ask that things be cleaned up, but that was only natural, she said.
Further, Brown said, the family was never provided with money he said the church promised to help them return home.
"If I wouldn't have done some under-the-table work ... I would never have the money to come home," Brown said.
All of this, he said, left a bad taste in his mouth.
They had to fight to keep items given to them, such as one of the home's two refrigerators and a washing machine, he said. The DiMaggios, who let the Browns have the items, said they had believed the appliances were donated to the house, not the family.
Brown said the DiMaggios, having heard a rumor the Browns were leaving, insulted the family by showing the house to another couple without the Browns' permission.
The DiMaggios had a right to show the house to prospective renters, Marge DiMaggio said. "Frankly, we didn't need permission to bring someone in."
The prospective renters said the house was trashed, but they did not see any vandalism, according to Brian DiMaggio.
The Browns never thanked the church for what it did, Marge DiMaggio said.
"I don't know why they would have a bad taste in their mouth when everything was given to them," she said. "We gave them everything. They never paid for anything."
Natural response
Therein might lie the problem, said psychologist Harald Graning of Confidential Counseling of Westminster.
While the Browns might look like the ultimate ingrates, their response is not unnatural, he said.
"Suppose that you were living your life," he said, "and all of a sudden God came down and destroyed your house? You'd probably be pissed."
The anger that people feel under such circumstances needs to be vented and often isn't.
Unfortunately, the overwhelming generosity of others can backfire by intensifying the recipient's sense of anger and helplessness.
"You are forced to accept charity," he said. "It's demeaning."
Doing good makes the benefactor feel better, not the person being helped, he said. When the person on the receiving end can't repay the kindness and feels compelled to feel appreciative, he or she can become extremely frustrated. Acting out can occur.
Church members trying to make sense of the situation shouldn't feel rejected or upset their gifts were rejected, he said.
***I saw a clip of Nagin announcing free internet service in N.O., like it was going to rescue the city. Whats up with that?***
Crime control! Get them hooked on free porn and they will stay home catching viruses, hijackers, trojan horses,and worms from the porn sites instead of out knocking people in the head for a few bucks!
Ah, but they did end up taking those things. The article says they had to "fight" to keep the appliances, and the DiMaggio's agreed to let them. Probably not worth the headache and hassle to force them to bring them back. You're right, it is certainly a "we're entitled" selfishness.
How about this part:
"Further, Brown said, the family was never provided with money he said the church promised to help them return home."
Freaking ingrates.
My husband and I lived in Grenada for 2 years, and my mother now says that living in a 3rd world country was pratice for this challenge. It is so sad, but New Orleans reminds me of Grenada now.
"That leftist psychologist is an idiot."
No, he is not an idiot, just the product of a profoundly Marxist academic system. By the way, isn't "leftist psychologist" redundant? ;-)
I think the psychologist at the end is as bad as the Browns. He totally excuses their actions. Oh, they were angry because they were forced to accept charity. No, they weren't forced. They could have turned it down and figured something out on their own.
Hey, I read about that. I'm going to sell my house and move down there. That's really a great deal. Nagin is such a genius. He knows what people want.
*** When the person on the receiving end can't repay the kindness and feels compelled to feel appreciative, he or she can become extremely frustrated. Acting out can occur.***
It never bothered my worthless brother-in-law (If you know him he probably owes you money). He even took his own mother to the cleaners several times promising to pay her back but never has.
I once had the privilege of spending an hour and a half chatting with your former mayor, Mr. Morial. I was impressed with his ability to talk for that length of time without actually saying one single thing. Do you have any better mayoral prospects on the horizon?
I have lived in Colombia, Mexico, Brazil and Egypt.
New Olreans in not better off now.
lol
And this is exactly what is done with your hard earned money that is wealth transfrred to people of this ilk.
Someday, taxpayers are going to snap.
Giving will always entail, a suffering of souls. Give freely without pre-conceived notions of gratitude, or you will suffer from pre-meditated resentment. These "givers" should be deeply ashamed of their publicly announced sniveling, pride filled bs.
---I am anxious to see what the excuse is for this one. Animals!
Fine. Try living on the street. Wow, what a bunch of ingrates.
I agree, Nagin is quite extroidinary at sounding good saying nothing. I don't know ho would be a better mayor at this point. But, as I have said before, I am having a BAD day. Ya know, one of those days where yacan't even catch a glimmer of light down the tunnel. LOL, venting is great. I literally just started laughing when I pictured Nagin at this meeting today. When he would psuedo-talk, the other leaders at the table would rub their eyes, look away, anything to keep from exploding! Nagin was driving everyone nuts!
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