Posted on 09/17/2005 6:59:48 AM PDT by teldon30
Dear Amy: I'd like to be in a relationship again, but I never even get asked out (unless you count frisky 85-year-olds and drunks at the corner bar). I'm a 32-year-old woman who's happy, sociable, and attractive. (I paid for college by modeling and continue to take care of myself.) I'm second-in-command at a big company, financially secure, and own a beautiful home. How can I meet men in general, and more specifically, men I'd actually want to date?
Deluxe Chopped Liver
Dear Deluxe: To scare away vampires, it takes garlic and crosses, which make ugly bulges in sleek, satin evening bags. Luckily, all you have to do to scare away men is pull out a business card that says ''senior vice president.''
''Power is the ultimate aphrodisiac,'' said Henry Kissinger. Sure it is — unless you're a woman. Research by Stephanie L. Brown and Brian P. Lewis, published in Evolution and Human Behavior (Nov. '04), seems to confirm what many lonely women at the top already know: When guys go for the woman in the boardroom, it isn't the woman running the meeting but the secretary who wheeled in the coffee and croissants before it started.
Sure, plenty of men will scamper up the corporate ladder for a one-night stand. But, according to Brown and Lewis' study, men looking for dates or relationships tend to prefer their subordinates to their colleagues or bosses. The researchers hypothesize that men evolved to want women they can control as a means of guarding against ''parental uncertainty'' — unwittingly raising kids fathered by the Neanderthal next door as their own. Brown and Lewis think this may also explain why men are suckers for ''behavioral expressions of vulnerability'' — women who act like they might not be able to make it across the street
(Excerpt) Read more at mcall.com ...
A little effort goes a long way in a marriage. It is showing that you care and know that good and bad you are in this world together. Beauty is a quality of soul not a quality of face. My husband and I have a joke expression
to describe the ideal woman.
" Strong like ox, beautiful like tractor"
hasn't anybody noticed that "chopped liver" wants a "relationship"? She does not indicate marriage, she does not indicate a desire for children (her clock may have rung).
She may just want a "booty call 'relationship'" where she can have a boyfriend/sex partner once a month or less. Perhaps a warm male body she can bring to company functions in order to combat rumors that she is unmarried because she is a homosexual.
She may even be NOT wanting marriage. It does not say. For all we know she could be the poster child for "die alone with 20 cat" feminists.
"I certainly wasn't talking about a man in charge being one who mistreats a woman -- just the opposite."
Agreed and understood, I knew that, Dear. ;^)
Seriously,
HD and Lowe's are NOT bad places to hang out...
the key word being HANG out.
If you're in there with a serious list trying to get home to fix that major wiring issue before the compressor is toast, flirting isn't very likely. And you see lots of guys with the same agendas....they've got things to do, places to go etc.
So going with a 'Gee, I wonder if they have any new blades down in the Chop Saw section" attitude is a good.....especially with the afterwork, "Mebby I need a new saw" crowd.
LIke when you hear that saying "Marilyn Monroe said Einstein was one of the sexist men she ever met".
Uhh-huhhh, nice.....
but when we return from fanstasyland, in reality
she dated and married pro-athletes, hollywood moguls, and banged a married JFK.
I love a man who knows when to keep quiet! LOL
I sat behind a woman who sounds just like the subject of the post on an airplane yesterday. She was fortyish, very corporate-looking, very slim and attractive, she might have even been a conservative (at one point, she complained about how much money the government was going to be spending to rebuild New Orleans). But she spent a good part of the trip complaining to the (unfortunate) sixtyish, married man seated next to her about how hard a time she was having finding anyone to marry. She spoke of going on a lot of dates with a lot of men she liked and thought were very nice, but apparently for some reason they never seemed to want to follow up and take the relationship further.
From what I could observe:
1) She was a motormouth. She never stopped talking and was sharing an awful lot of personal information early on with someone she had just met.
2) She apparently works in sales - and was in "sales" mode during the entire conversation. She wore me out, and I wasn't even talking to her.
3) She had just a touch of the wild-eyed, desperate, Nancy Pelosi look.
4) She apparently travels on business much of the time.
5) She sounded absolutely convinced that she still had time to have children (I seriously doubt it) - though the subtext was clear: she would have to start almost immediately with any man she chose to marry.
Any of the five is a deal-killer on a first date. If she was sharing all of this in an hour and a half with a man she had just met, how much worse would she be on a date? It's obvious what her problem is - but it's unlikely she'll be able to remedy it in time to accomplish her goal.
"These woman are so used to bossing people around they don't know how to turn it off."
This is true, my Wife is one of those women. She eventually made more money than me in our relationship and I noticed her becoming more aggressive and bossy. She worked with mostly men, so I felt like she had to be that way. I'm not a macho type of guy, so it did'nt bother me too much. I just told her to save that attitude for the office and everythings been cool since then.
I've learned never to underestimate what a woman thinks she's entitled to...
After he ran into some of his neighbors in the check-out line and starting visiting with them, his obviously annoyed wife marched into the store, quite loudly demanded to know what the h$ll is taking so long.
Texas Candidate for Governor, Kinky Friedman
A hardware store gives you the perfect opening: ask him for help! There isn't a man in the world who won't jump at the chance to help an attractive woman with something within his realm of competence. ;)
Seeeeeeeeeeeeee?? I don't date "husbands". You can find all those guys over at the dating sites. lol
Monica debased herself.
Welcome to Fantasy Island, sweetie! :-)
You summed it up very well. bump.
In my experience, women define "take charge as needed" as "take charge when I don't want to..."
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