He did well in small classes, not in traditional ones. He was easily distracted, but also defiant, and I believe he's passive aggressive as well.
He was one violent child, that's for sure. As a toddler, he'd go into a rage and run head first into the front door like a little bull. He figured out how to remove the safety covers off the electric outlets, and stick forks in them, blowing the breakers. He was 3, I believe. No matter what I did to childproof that house, he found a way around it.
He had no problem with attacking his older sisters, who are 5 and 7 years older than him. The teachers had to keep him off the playground because of all the fights.
Here's an illustration of some of the good stuff: when he was 12, he wrecked his remote contolled jeep. The battery pack looked like a miniature bundle of dynamite. Since this was almost Halloween, my older daughter and I thought he should go as the Unibomber for trick or treat. Hooded sweatshirt, dark glasses, and the battery pack.
The problem is that he strapped the battery pack to his leg, then told everyone at school that he had a bomb. The police were called, and he almost was arrested for a terrorist threat. The vice principal and I had a cordial relationship, so all he got was yet another suspension, and trash pick up after school.
There's more, but you get the idea. He wore me out. I still have no idea what's wrong with that boy...
You've had a much worse time than I have.
My daughter exhausts me, because she is so intense, but we've never had cops involved.
Sounds as if your ex is aggrivating the situation.
Hope your son makes it through okay
"He was easily distracted, but also defiant, and I believe he's passive aggressive as well."
He sounds like my kid brother, who also exhibited behavioral problems from babyhood on. He has constantly been impulsive and defiant, and my parents were at their wits' end with him.
I thought he may have ADD (which I have), but now I do see certain autistic tendencies. For example, as a baby, he used to rock his crib constantly. Now an adult, he is on his way to becoming a full-fledged bum. He can't seem to hold a job or activity for long. I have urged him to get help, but he won't.
That's the problem with treating these people. It's a two-way street. Parking them in front of a therapist doesn't help, unless they are open to treatment. I urged my brother to at least try medication.