"What a wierd and stupid country we live in."
What's wrong with blowing stuff up?
Posted on 06/08/2005 11:47:09 AM PDT by Al Simmons
Ever want to look into the mind of a Clinton-era ‘Generation-X’ slacker who ‘made a mistake’ by accepting a prestigious Air Force Academy slot and then just could not stand to serve out his 6 year military commitment? Well, the following would be hilarious if it wasn’t so sad (from the standpoint of our nation). Hopefully 9-11 has somewhat cured this kind of attitude amongst the younguns.
The following is the actual text of a handwritten letter left at his desk by a 24-year-old Second Lieutenant, a US Air Force Academy graduate, on the day he deserted from the Air Force and flew to Cancun, Mexico, in the middle of an Air Force training class in the late 1990s. He left it in an envelope on the outside of which were written the words:
‘WHERE’S MARK?’
“To my friends in the US Air Force,
I’ve decided to embark on a new adventure, and you may be wondering why. Actually, that’s a good question, and I’m sure my hand will cramp up and I’ll drift off before I’ve concocted a reasonable reply. How to distill this storm of ideas into some coherence?..
As of this writing I am an officer, an AF member, an (American) US citizen, a man, an artist, a mammal, and a sentient being, in that order. When the needs and longings of one of the deeper, richer levels cries out for fulfillment, I can deny it only a little while. I’ve tried, for two years willingly and for three years with growing disharmony, to play this role I scripted at the misimpressionable age of 13. (Oh USAFA admissions office, please turn away all future applicants who list an interest in art. Have mercy.) But when the raucous rhythms in my head drown out all trace of AFIT instructors and SV staff meetings, when the shelves of AFIs and “special” programs dissolve into puddles of gooey indifference, only I remain, a little boy standing at the edge of an emerald ocean, tickled by the breeze and smiling at the gulf, no longer even grasping why people spend their lifetimes staring into cathode ray tubes decoding the language of flashing lights and smattering printers.
Why? Whoever reads this – OSI, AFIT, SV, or others… Why? What the F—k are you doing it all for? Who cares? Will anyone remember you? Will you touch my life? Are you happy? If your light winks out today and the breath of life floats silently away, will you be able to say, “To my own self I was true?”
I sat in class today, reeling at the violence of the waves of irrelevance battering against the seawall of my purpose and felt the camel’s back break. Can I wait another 4 years and get out ‘honorably?’ Would that I were blessed with such patience. I am weak, irresolute, fluid, impulsive. I am no respecter of status, standards, precedent, or convention. I only want it all – is that so much? To sample every dish at the banquet of this world, to step lightly through a life without clocks and suspense slips and long staff meetings and short tempers.
I love you all. If you catch up with me I’ll buy you a drink, a toast to the freedom of a heart let loose, a toast to living in the delicious beauty of this moment. I apologize for the inconvenience my fugue may cause. I knew of no other way. I fear for my sanity (what remains of it.)
If ever you think of me, may it be to remind you that this life is yours. If you are not happy, you are the only one who can change that. Create the reality you dream of.
Do what you want with my stuff. I’m not coming back. I respect you for continuing in service to the AF and nation. I only wish that I had realized sooner that this is not my place. The shackles chafe at my wings. Give me liberty…
To the other students in SV101 – its been fun. Vince – I know what you’re grinning about. Bill – wake up, its 7:15. Steve – you’ve got a way with words. Lori – you’re married to a very lucky man. Peggy – Mark’s outta here! Damien – I’ll give you $10 US and a pair of Levis…Serge – remember that last conversation on personal ethics? And to all the other students, instructors, and friends, sorry for causing a commotion and I wish you the best in the rest of the course and your careers. Now I have a plane to catch!
MARK
(P.S. Now the Distinguished Graduate award is wide open!)”
POSTSCRIPT: The young man’s flight to live the life of a Central American painter (and he was a good painter, too) was cut short when the $$ ran out 3 weeks later, and he came back and turned himself in. He was placed in confinement pending his court-martial for desertion, dereliction of duty and theft (he paid for his plane ticket with his Government Credit Card.)
The 4-5 month confinement drove his whining to even greater heights, and he begged to just be dismissed from the Air Force.
The request went to the Clinton-appointed Air Force Legal Counsel, who approved the request and let the young man go to live the artist’s life, having shorted the AF $200K in education costs. (Don’t know if he’s managed to repay any of it yet, or if the Gov’t has pursued recovery).
All I know is that when he was merely dismissed instead of court-martialed, my general – the Convening Authority for the Court-Martial – was steaming “We used to shoot people for that in Viet Nam!” he said. (Maybe not exactly, but he was definitely not ‘touchy-feely’ like Lieutenant Mark.)
Hitler was a painter! That worked out rather well!
sp
Deserting your post isn't "nothing." That little puke is lucky he went to one of the academies....if he'd been a mere mortal, such as an enlisted troop or a non-academy officer, he would have been sent to a military prison. Troll on back to DU. Your sniveling sounds more like it fits them.
Thanks for the link! (Born in VERY late 1963)
I know what it means, I just want to see the source for your assertion that "cissy derives from Narcissist."
Not that I don't believe you; I just never heard it before. I only know of the "sister" derivation.
From Ovid's Narcissus (which is where narcissism is derived) As students in England, we were taught this was the origin of the derogatory term "cissy" (a man who loves himself or loves one who looks like himself) I have no proof - only my memory.
I parenthesized "prevaricatin'" because I anticipated that a FReeper such as yourself would pin me to the wall.
And you did;)
sp
What's wrong with blowing stuff up?
Well, it does sound a bit fanciful to me, though the fact that "cissy" is the British spelling gives it slightly more credence there.
Still, "sister" seems the most likely from a semantic point of view. Sister - woman - weak - cissy
Narcissus was defined by his egocentrism rather than cowardliness or weakness.
" Much ado 'bout nothing."
???
It takes over $200,000 to train the guy, and he skips town.
How is that cost outlay with zero return 'much ado about nothing'?
I can remember, probably as early as 1962, when I was five, that I was a baby boomer. You know, part of the post war baby boom from 1946 to 1965? Then decades later some guy comes along and says oh no, you're a Jones. No thanks, I got no Jones for Jones.
Mark? Mark Morford? The San Francisco Chronicle's public faggot? Sure sounds like him...
Nope. Not that dude. I've given you enough clues - if you read them carefully, and Google properly, you might find the letter I quoted cause its hot off his press....he is a 'Bay area type guy' living deep in the REDDEST of the RED states (hint there).
Don't know how he managed to make it to 30!
*ROTFLMAO*!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
His parents should be fined the 200k that his "education" cost for not aborting him!
I hope he is a really, really good artist.
He will have a herd time landing a traditional job.
herd=hard
Jet jockeys should not be confused with warriors. You would never read a whining, girlie-man note like this from a Marine.
I felt the letter authored by Lt. Mark "?" evidenced a narcissistic personality and cowardice, in no particular order.
Hence my comment cissy and sissy were "interchangeable"
I love semantics;)
sp
COULDN'T AGREE MORE!
The weenie side of many (not all) AF types made me often regret not having gone into the Army or the Navy (I am not so arrogant as to think that I could have made it through Marine Basic - maybe at 18-20, but not at 31 when I went into AF JAG.)
Still, I spent all of 1996 attached at the hip to an Army 2-star theater commander as his interpreter (and about a million other things!) in Bosnia (totally unrelated to my JAG duties, but related to the fact that I was the #1 Serbo-Croat linguist in the AF at the time - a sideline owing to my having been born there - and the Army was woefully short in that category, so....they 'borrowed me'.) Going out on other 'special missions' in the dead of winter, dodging landmines and eyeing the locals warily gave me an entirely new perspective - and fulfilled the real reason I wanted to seve in uniform. After that year AF JAG got pretty boring and I got out after the 'Toons illegal war on Serbia (personal and family conflict (as well as legal) with that policy as you may imagine).>
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.