[Lady Jag]

IT'S NATIONAL JELLY DONUT DAY!!!
Another difficult assignment;
you know what to do!


Pisces, I hope it comes out better than it looks for ya, bud!
Horrorscope
Wednesday, June 8, 2005

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Aries (March 21 - April 19)

Between now and the vernal equinox, trust anyone with freckles. After that, trust no one.

Taurus (April 20 - May 20)

You will unearth a small stone figurine, while digging in a garden. If you set it on your television and put a small bowl of fruit in front of it, those unsightly warts should clear up in a week or two.

Gemini (May 21 - June 20)

You will wake with a start tonight, and hear a sound like that of a whole herd of capybara snuffling around in your closet. Fortunately, when you switch on the light, that will turn out to be all it is.

Cancer (June 21 - July 22)

And old friend will call today, who you haven't talked to in years. He'll remind you that you owe him money.

Leo (July 23 - August 22)

You will mortally offend a friend today when a hilarious joke pops unbidden into your mind during your friend's sad description of his problems.

Virgo (August 23 - September 22)

Good day to wear tropical fruit on your head.

Libra (September 22 - October 22)

You are being watched by a large penguin. Act normal.

Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)

You may lose sight of what is truly important to you, if you're not careful. In other words, it not whether you win or lose, it's whether you end up with your leg in a cast for 3 months.

Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)

Terrific day to saunter. Don't let it turn into a mosey, though.

Capricorn (December 22 - January 20)

You will develop the extremely rare "Perkin's Disease", and will start having a strange compulsion to shoot things with tranquilizer darts, or sell insurance. Plus, you will try to trick your friend, "Jim", into wrestling a giant anaconda.

Aquarius (January 21 - February 18)

An elderly Chinese gentleman will drop by for a visit. You'll spend the entire visit in complete silence, except for the occasional clink of a teacup in a saucer.

Pisces (February 19 - March 20)

Try to be logical, today. It's your only hope. (Which is considerably better than it would be if your "only hope" was some old geezer on the desert planet Falderol and you had to send a robot shaped like an underarm roller-type deodorant off to find him. But not as fun.)

[Darksheare]

Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
You will wake with a start tonight, and hear a sound like that of a whole herd of capybara snuffling around in your closet. Fortunately, when you switch on the light, that will turn out to be all it is.



The capybaras!
The HORRIBLE capybaraaaaaaas....!

[E.G.C.]

((HUGS))good afternoon, L.J. How's it going?

[HiJinx]

Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)

Terrific day to saunter. Don't let it turn into a mosey, though.

Oh no!! Too Late!!! It's Crash and Burn day at the office, aaarrrrrrrgghhhhhhh!!!

[Kathy in Alaska]

I like this day!

[GodBlessUSA]

Hi Lady Jag!:)

That was a double take when I saw that picture on my ping. LOL!!! Thanks :) Good thing, no giant anaconda and I have no friend name Jim nearby. No urge to sell insurance. Although, I could take to a strange compulsion to shoot things with tranquilizer darts! ;)

[ValerieUSA]

Trust me Aries, I have freckles

[luvie]

ARIES (March 21 - April 19) Between now and the vernal equinox, trust anyone with freckles. After that, trust no one.

I've got freckles--trust me!!!!

[bannie]

Leo (July 23 - August 22)
You will mortally offend a friend today when a hilarious joke pops unbidden into your mind during your friend's sad description of his problems

See, THAT's why I never have believed in horoscopes! THAT all happened YESTERDAY!

>:p

[Soaring Feather]

Cancer (June 21 - July 22) And old friend will call today, who you haven't talked to in years. He'll remind you that you owe him money.

Dang, I thought I paid him!! LOL