IT'S NATIONAL JELLY DONUT DAY!!!
Another difficult assignment;
you know what to do!
Pisces, I hope it comes out better than it looks for ya, bud!
Wednesday, June 8, 2005
Between now and the vernal equinox, trust anyone with freckles. After that, trust no one.
You will unearth a small stone figurine, while digging in a garden. If you set it on your television and put a small bowl of fruit in front of it, those unsightly warts should clear up in a week or two.
You will wake with a start tonight, and hear a sound like that of a whole herd of capybara snuffling around in your closet. Fortunately, when you switch on the light, that will turn out to be all it is.
And old friend will call today, who you haven't talked to in years. He'll remind you that you owe him money.
You will mortally offend a friend today when a hilarious joke pops unbidden into your mind during your friend's sad description of his problems.
Good day to wear tropical fruit on your head.
You are being watched by a large penguin. Act normal.
You may lose sight of what is truly important to you, if you're not careful. In other words, it not whether you win or lose, it's whether you end up with your leg in a cast for 3 months.
Terrific day to saunter. Don't let it turn into a mosey, though.
You will develop the extremely rare "Perkin's Disease", and will start having a strange compulsion to shoot things with tranquilizer darts, or sell insurance. Plus, you will try to trick your friend, "Jim", into wrestling a giant anaconda.
An elderly Chinese gentleman will drop by for a visit. You'll spend the entire visit in complete silence, except for the occasional clink of a teacup in a saucer.
Try to be logical, today. It's your only hope. (Which is considerably better than it would be if your "only hope" was some old geezer on the desert planet Falderol and you had to send a robot shaped like an underarm roller-type deodorant off to find him. But not as fun.) |