Doctors Seek Kitchen Knife Ban: Doctors claim long kitchen knives serve no purpose except as weapons

The Scotsman ^ | May 27, 2005 | Edward Black

[quidnunc]

Long, pointed kitchen knives should be banned as part of a concerted effort to reduce the terrible injuries and deaths caused by stabbing attacks, doctors warned today.

Accident and emergency medics claim the knives serve no useful purpose in the kitchen but are proving deadly on the streets of Britain, with the doctors claiming the knives are used in as many as half of all stabbings.

The doctors claimed they had consulted leading chefs who said the knives were not needed for cooking — a claim disputed by chefs contacted by The Scotsman.

Latest figures from the Scottish Executive show that in 2003, 55 of 108 homicide victims were stabbed by a sharp instrument — often a kitchen knife.

Writing in the British Medical Journal, specialist registrar Dr Emma Hern and emergency medicine consultant Dr Mike Beckett said a short pointed knife may cause a substantial superficial wound if used in an assault, but is unlikely to penetrate to inner organs. However, a pointed long blade pierces the body like "cutting into a ripe melon".

Internal organs can be heavily damaged, causing serious injury or death. The doctors said long knives with blunt ends — such as bread knives — would do far less damage.

-snip-

[beezdotcom]

and its come to this, the most absurd part of it all is when we were saying it would come to this 10 years ago everyone thought we were kooks, and now wont remember we said it..

Start searching the archives, and smoking out some of these naysayers...

[fortunecookie]

Yep, they've got to go! We're back to slurping gruel from bowls. Until we start banging each other on the head with the bowls.

[beezdotcom]

Yep, once we start 'sporkin 'em', we'll be reduced to slurping gruel from bowls. Because even straws can be weapons.

Hey, ever been hit in the head with a bowl? It HURTS. And perish the thought of using one as the template for a haircut - BAN them.

[Calpernia]

My area will be affected.

[perfect stranger]

The doctors claimed they had consulted leading chefs who said the knives were not needed for cooking.

I'd love to know what these doctors eat for dinner so that they don't need knives.

[Calpernia]

Correction...this is better:

My area will be affected infected.

[shaggy eel]

What do they use to butcher meat then?

,,, sharpened bones from dead doctors.

[patton]

I know. ;)

[patton]

Too late. The infection has metasticized.

[shaggy eel]

I'd love to know what these doctors eat for dinner so that they don't need knives.

,,, ah, but they're shorter knives on dinner tables. You know, the ones that are so short that you have to drive them a lot harder into your victims.

[Jeff Chandler]

The doctors claimed they had consulted leading chefs who said the knives were not needed for cooking

Critics of English cooking agree.

[Fido969]

Careful! You'll put an eye out with that thing!

[Fido969]

"You know, the ones that are so short that you have to drive them a lot harder into your victims.

Little scalpels....

[fortunecookie]

Yep, see my #42, it's back to bowls of gruel for us!

[fortunecookie]

Yep, it's all dangerous. I don't know how we'll eat, but I'm sure they'll come up with some safe way. It's for the children, you know...

[Petronski]

They're really really doing it.


It used to be satire, but now they're at least thinking about it:


BAN KNIVES






Good grief.

[Oztrich Boy]

Darn. I lose.

I saw the tirle and predicted "Scrappleface"

[shaggy eel]

Little scalpels....

,,, any fancy name you want. The main thing is the Brits are developing a culture in this regard. They've been spending too much time in cosy sitting rooms watching soccer on the telly. It looks like motivation and long knives are developing as a fashion trend. Open the doors to the Parliamentary dining room this instant!!

[Calpernia]

Thanks for the encouragement :(

[pandemoniumreigns]

Hey.

That hurt.