Posted on 05/01/2005 4:54:50 AM PDT by Rebelbase
WASHINGTON (Reuters) - First Lady Laura Bush grabbed the stage from President Bush at the White House correspondents annual dinner on Saturday and confessed to all his early bedtimes had turned her into a "desperate housewife."
Laura Bush, who is often seen smiling sweetly at her husband's side, stood up just in time to rescue the audience of political heavyweights and Hollywood celebrities from Bush's retelling of a joke about steel rail "cattle guards" that bombed before a Montana town meeting in March.
"Not that old joke -- not again," Laura Bush said, as her husband willingly relinquished the stage.
"I've been attending these dinners for years and just quietly sitting there," the First Lady told the audience. "Well, I've got a few things I want to say for a change."
One of her main targets was the president's bed time.
"I said to him the other day, 'George, if you really want to end tyranny in this world, you're going to have to stay up later,"' Laura Bush said. "Nine o'clock and Mr. Excitement here is in bed, and I am watching 'Desperate Housewives' -- with Lynne Cheney. Ladies and gentlemen, I am a desperate housewife."
Laura Bush also ribbed her husband for his notoriously rowdy youth, but said they were meant to be together.
"I was a librarian that spent 12 hours a day in the library. Yet somehow I met George."
Laura Bush's string of one-liners generated hearty laughs from the audience, which included celebrity names such as Richard Gere, Mary Tyler Moore, Venus and Serena Williams, Goldie Hawn and Elle MacPherson, as well as journalists and politicians.
The roasting continued as comedian Cedric the Entertainer took the stage, even though he conceded that "I thought I could follow the president. The first lady is something different."
He said Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice has two sides to her, one that's all business and one that has street credibility.
"Condi is the person you see on television with the nice hair, and then there's Leezza, the one with her hair wrapped up on the phone with her girlfriends watching BET (Black Entertainment Television)."
When my husband got home from work this afternoon he told me that according to radio he was listening to all day Laura Bush appears to be the latest in up and coming stand up comis!!!
Then I told him about some of the comments on this thread.........he just rolled his eyes.
Sheesh.... just reading through this thread my eyes have completely rolled to the back of my head.
I'm gobsmacked !!! LOL
Look at the look on Dubya's face . . . he's having as good a time as Laura is. He seems like he's enjoying the hell out of her monologue!
It's so nice to see a couple genuinely in love.
Clearly you didn't get the memo.
We are a dour, humorless bunch, except when we're lighting our cigars with old ladies' Social Security checks, at which time we chuckle evilly.
Damn, I wish I'd watched!
TOO funny!
You need to get your mind out of the gutter.
LOL!!!!!!!!
I've had nearly as many laughs reading this as I did watching her performance last night!!!!
Wouldn't you know! I missed the "whore jokes"!
Behind every successful man....
Lighten up - it was a lot of fun. Even conservative Christians know that there is no secularfeminazi lurking behind every tree.
The kind of woman I would like go out and have a drink with.
I said that I missed the "whore" stuff. Not the "silly, off-color joke" stuff.
:-)
Comedy.
You know, the absurd juxtaposition of incongruous concepts?
Example: A drunken slut pawing over a male stripper would not be funny.
Lynn Cheney doing the same thing would be ludicrous and absurd. And funny.
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