Posted on 04/13/2005 11:12:46 AM PDT by tuffydoodle
Mom not laughing at 911 dispatcher's 'joke'
By Leila Fadel
Star-Telegram Staff Writer
WATAUGA - Lori came home to find her daughters fighting that Monday evening. Her 12-year-old had kicked a hole in the door, and the girls were hitting and throwing things at each other. She feared one or both would be seriously hurt.
She called 911 and asked for help. Her 12-year-old daughter was out of control, she told the call-taker.
"OK. Do you want us to come over to shoot her?" the dispatcher asked, according to a recording released this week. For five seconds, the line went dead.
"Are you there?" the call-taker asked.
"Excuse me?" Lori said.
Mike Forbess, a dispatcher of five years for the Watauga Department of Public Safety, then told her he was joking and apologized. But Lori cannot get his comment out of her head.
"This is a slap in the face that my child was not important enough, my call for help, my 911 call was not important enough that he had to make a joke about it," Lori said Monday. She asked that her last name not be used to avoid identifying her daughters, one of whom has emotional problems.
Forbess immediately told his supervisor about the call. He received a letter of reprimand two days later. Forbess received a second letter of reprimand from Chief David Van Laar on Monday, the same day the Star-Telegram obtained a copy of the 911 call recording, and of Forbess' disciplinary records.
The mother, however, said her faith in the 911 system remains shaken. She said she plans to file a formal complaint.
"I do not have words to tell you how shocked I am that someone is allowed to do this," she said. "You don't do people like this, and then get a slap on the wrist."
In his letter to Forbess, Van Laar wrote: "This type of response cannot be tolerated, and this letter shall serve as notice that any future unprofessional responses while answering the 911 line will be cause for termination."
But the reprimand is not enough, the mother said.
The next time she has an emergency, she said, she won't feel safe calling 911.
"This man does need to be disciplined," Lori said. "How can a person in this line of work be so unfeeling that he asked a person who needed help, 'Would you like us to come over and shoot your child?'
"That's an interoffice disciplinary action," she said of the reprimands. "That doesn't do anything.
Van Laar made no excuses for the dispatcher.
"The reason I didn't take tougher action is, he immediately owned up to his supervisor and said he made a mistake," Van Laar said. "He's a good employee. He just made a severe mistake which is inexcusable. ... This is not something you should hear on the other end of a 911 call."
In an interview Monday, Forbess said he is sorry for his comment to the woman. In five years with the department, the dispatcher has never been disciplined for his handling of 911 calls.
Forbess has received two commendations from community members for his work. He was disciplined once with a written warning for working an unauthorized shift for a co-worker.
"I am so sorry for what I said to that lady, and I can never make it up to her," Forbess said. "I'm ashamed of my actions, what I said and what I did. I would take it back if I could, but I can't. I'm just very sorry that I did it. It was a poor choice of things to say."
Forbess said that he sometimes tells jokes or changes his tone of voice to ease the stress of a caller. In this case, he said, his words made the situation worse.
"I admit what I did. It was stupid, it was inexcusable and I'm sorry," Forbess said. "I know it's not enough for her or for the papers or for the rest of the world. I've taken the punishment that they gave."
Nobody needs the 911 operator to tell jokes. If this clown wants to be a comedian, he should hit an open mike night instead.
Now we know why the girl is an a$$hole - genetics & environment.
It takes a Village Emergency Response Unit to raise a child.
"Adult males tend to end arguments among children."
You're right... How can we together as a society get more men to take responsibility for their offspring? Too many just seem to jump from skirt to skirt...
She was trying to call Nanny-911 but got the wrong number.
Maybe this child is as big as she is and she knew she couldn't handle her. Doesn't mean she is a bad parent. I think that is way judgmental. Who knows what kind of treatment this girl has received or what she has been through. Give the woman a break.
Next time she has an emergency she can call one of her daughters.
That I know of.
I am Mom and I ended arguments in our house -- in fact, there were very few -- when I used one of the kid's entire first and middle names -- everything became very quiet, very fast.
Calling 911 on a 12-year old she couldn't control? Give me a break -- what a louzy parent IMHO.
Domestic disputes are probably one of the top reasons police are called. Cops hate those calls because they never know what they'll find. Domestic disputes can turn deadly. To dismiss domestic disputes as not being important enough to call 911 makes me think you may not have much experience with domestic disputes, which of course is a good thing.
This pathetic mother is blaming the 911 dispatcher instead of being embarrassed to death that she called a number for medical emergencies to restrain the hellions she's reared. The dispatcher should have informed her to call the police if it was a public safety type call.
No kidding. My sister and I had to punch each other in silence. This was especially true when we were all in the car. Then dad would realize what was going on and he'd reach his looong arm out to the back seat and just start swinging.
My sister and I looked like Cassius Clay with all our bobbing and weaving.
BTW, it was always, always, her fault.
However, you don't speak for everyone.
"Officer would you get my cat down out of top of that tree!"
What would her damages be?
Usually a mother's authority comes either from her use of discipline early or the threat of the father's upper body strength.
Or, as I'm thinking, the first time she has an actual emergency.
Dan
Emotional distress, perhaps? Some tricky lawyer getting a portion of the proceeds could think of something, I'm sure.
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