40 Most Awesomely Bad Love Songs

vh-1/viacom ^ | 3-02-05

[sully777]

What is the most awesomely bad love song ever? The one that makes you cringe when you hear it, but you just can't turn it off. What love song makes you shake your head, roll your eyes, laugh, gag, shed a tear, or just punch something because it's so horrendously great that you love to hate it. Or is it vice versa? VH1 is counting down the 40 Most Awesomely Bad Love Songs....The kind of songs that might end a relationship rather than enhance it. You get the drift.

Join us as we count down and celebrate fantastically cheesy lyrics, the best and worst metaphors, awkward and confusing themes, and of course, those strange, misguided flukes from our favorite artists, while our team of experts help explain why we've deemed these songs so (un)worthy. We've been covering our ears, shutting off the radio, and running from the room screaming for too long. It's time to ban these songs to our awesomely bad Hall of F(Sh)ame!

[Semper Paratus]

In the sub-category of self-love songs is:

I am Woman, hear me roar!

[Old Grumpy]

Any and all songs by "Sweet Baby" James Taylor!

[ArcLight]

Dang straight. I pray to God I never hear it again!

You keep making me laugh like that, you'll get me fired! LOL!

[Space Wrangler]

"Afternoon Delight" by some one-almost-hit-wonder.

The Starlight Vocal Band. Actually not all that bad when in the company of most of the stinkers on this thread so far. All just a matter of opinion though.

[Heartlander]

My Love - Mrs. Miller

[JustaCowgirl]

"You're breakin' my heart, you're tearing it apart so f*** you!"

Now there's some deathless lyrics right there. I also like Travis Tritt's "Here's a quarter, call someone who cares."

Many good candidates for worst. I nominate anything by Herman and the Hermits. But Honey by Bobby Goldsboro is surely the bottom of the barrel. Any barrel.

[mikegi]

There was a movie several years ago where the students at a University locked all the staff in a room and left "Afternoon Delight" cranked up on infinite repeat. After an hour, people were crashing through windows trying to escape the screeching song.

The movie was terrible but that one scene made up for it. Still cracks me up just thinking about it.

[jurroppi1]

Homer: "Lisa, if you really wanna save the memories, I say get a tattoo! It preserves the things you love! STARLAND VOCAL BAND? THEY SUCK!"

[Petronski]

"You think that people would have had enough of silly love songs.
I've looked around me and I see it isn't so. Oh no.
Some people wanna fill the world with silly love songs,
But what's wrong with that?
I'd like to know.
'Cause here I go.
Again!!!"







[BANG!]

[thud]

[JustaCowgirl]

Sugar Shack.

Not sure who sung it. I'm trying to forget.

[Miss Marple]

Are you talking about that horrible song "Wildfire?"

[somerville]

I said in my post that Debby Boone sang "You Light Up My Life." I think you meant to write to post #51, who got the Debbies confused.

I interviewed Pat Boone a couple of years ago -he is darn proud of his little girl Debby.

[camle]

izzat like the takeoff on Paul McArtney?

"my glove does it good"!

[JesseJane]

Hey! Leave the Monkies alone!! LOLOL!!


Zilch

Zilch!
Mister dobalena, mister bob dobalena
Mister dobalena, mister bob dobalena
Mister dobalena, mister bob dobalena
Mister dobalena, mister bob dobalena

2nd part
Zilch!
China clipper calling alameda
China clipper calling alameda
China clipper calling alameda
China clipper calling alameda

3rd part
Zilch!
Never mind the furthermore, the plea is self defense.
Never mind the furthermore, the plea is self defense.
Never mind the furthermore, the plea is self defense.
Never mind the furthermore, the plea is self defense.

4th part
Zilch!
It is of my opinion that the people are intending.
It is of my opinion that the people are intending.
It is of my opinion that the people are intending.
It is of my opinion that the people are intending.

[maggief]

Muskrat Love

Muskrat, muskrat candlelight
Doin' the town and doin' it right
In the evenin'
It's pretty pleasin'

Muskrat Susie, Muskrat Sam
Do the jitterbug out in muskrat land
And they shimmy
And Sammy's so skinny

And they whirled and they twirled and they tangoed
Singin' and jingin' the jango
Floatin' like the heavens above
It looks like muskrat love

Nibbling on bacon, chewin' on cheese
Sammy says to Susie "Honey, would you please be my missus?"
And she say yes
With her kisses

And now he's ticklin' her fancy
Rubbin' her toes
Muzzle to muzzle, now anything goes
As they wriggle, and Sue starts to giggle

And they whirled and they twirled and they tangoed
Singin' and jingin' the jango
Floatin' like the heavens above
It looks like muskrat love

La da da da da ...

[proud American in Canada]

Don't know if this has been posted, but "Beth" by Kiss comes immediately to mind. :)

[HungarianGypsy]

We may be reliving the '70s, but this time it's with Alice Cooper playing the music, rather than performing it.

[js1138]

Nashville Cats is a great song. You want bad, try Ruby, Don't Take Your Love To Town. That's a lot of four letter words packed into one title.

[msjhall]

They were recently offered a billion bucks for a reunion but turned it down.


That happened a while ago. I heard that even more recently they were offered a lot more (maybe 2 bn) to perform 100 concerts. Anybody?

[Space Wrangler]

You are thinking of LOVE Shack by the B-52's.