Finally, The End Of Canada

FrontPageMag.com ^ | June 7, 2001 | Jamie Glazov

[CWOJackson]

I didn't think you were and I wasn't being serious about the libertarians...well, only half serious.

[TheLion]

We would, at least, end up with more room!

[CWOJackson]

LOL! We could always annex Vancouver city and give it to the libertarians for their free state project.

[Rytwyng]

No way Republicans would permit Canada to join the United States; the GOP would never control anything again.

Unless, as part of a package deal, California is given back to Mexico... costing the Democrats 54 electoral votes, etc.

[Rytwyng]

There is more firepower stacked in closets in Texas than in most third world armories around the globe.

Ranch Rescue

[CWOJackson]

Or Congress could pass a bill banning deodorant, hence winning all of Quebec's electoral votes.

[Rytwyng]

Annexing Canada ..would be a catyastroph...25 million voters, most of whom would immediately become yellow-dog Democrats.

Not necessarily. There's a strong conservative resistance that we don't usually hear about down here. Check out Republic of Alberta.

[Rytwyng]

Or Congress could pass a bill banning deodorant, hence winning all of Quebec's electoral votes.

Bad idea. If they won't repent of being French, we don't want them. Note my tagline -- it refers to a distant ancestor whom the French tried to exterminate.

[GGpaX4DumpedTea]

My "NO" would be there beside yours. And thanks for the neat analogy - I don't want to have to remember "what happened" to the US economy when it joined with its poor illiterate cousin to the North.

The other negative part of this whole treatise is that unless there could be a massive deportation of all things Frogged, we would still have to deal with a Canadian Quebec. The imbecilic nature of Canadian leftism would be magnified without a tempering moderate influence from the rest of Canada.

[lentulusgracchus]

Well they tried that once before.

Yup. Didn't work worth a holler in hell, did it? ;)

[Heatseeker]

I agree with your idea - Alberta and Saskatchewan are OK but anything else is questionable.

But, as an American who has long followed Canadian politics, I can tell you that every Canadian I've ever talked to sees union with the US as a fear, not as a hope. There are obviously a few in the two above provinces that don't feel that way, but even conservatively-minded Canadians are proud of their country.

Don't mistake the current Liberal government (Chrétien/Martin) for what Canada is like all the time. Heck, even we elected Clinton for 2 terms! As I write this, I'm waiting to hear if Martin is going to call the Canadian federal election for June 28th. If he does, the next Canadian Prime Minister may be Stephen Harper of the Conservatives (yeah I know the 5/8/04 Ipsos-Reid poll suggests the Liberals are recovering, but I'm not sure I believe it). If that happens and if, God forbid, Kerry wins in November, Canada will have a more conservative government than the US!

[230FMJ]

There are still a few hard working, conservative Yankees up in New England, but they're getting hard to find. Maine, like other "enlightened" states is rapidly being overrun by Saab/Volvo driving, latte' drinking, fuzzy-headed liberals.They mean well, but you may be right in ceding them to our Socialist neighbors to the North.

[imfleck]

All your country are belong to us!

[lentulusgracchus]

I was thinking of allowing Canada to come in as two states.

No dice. We don't want the populous liberal eastern provinces screwing up our politics even more.

My solution: Split the sheets in both countries, and we get Manitoba and everything west of it including the territories (unless the Indians in Nunavut and the old Northwest Territories, want to go it alone), Quebec becomes an independent Francophone country, and eastern Canada has to take New England whom we'll kick out of the Union, together with the entire right bank of the Hudson from Montauk Point to the Fishkill River. We keep the rest of upstate New York and Bedloes Island and all of the Hudson River, the boundary being at the low-water mark on the right bank. We drop the Hudson River bridges in the harbor (except for the Narrows), sink the ferries, and dynamite the tunnel and embargo everything east of the boundary. Joizy and Perth Amboy become the entrepot. And Staten Island, I guess.

So Canada gets Barney Frank, Hillary, Slick, Charlie Schumer, the whole Kennedy family, and Penny Collins, Olympia Snowe, and Sen. Jeffords. We get the Athabaska Tar Sands, the Alberta oil fields and frontier-gas play, immense lakes, all the gold left in the Yukon, and a ton of prairie-province wheat, plus real estate that will only become more valuable with global warming, including the Arctic archipelago, whose mineral potential is practically untested.

Sound like a plan?

[lentulusgracchus]

Oh, and I almost forgot -- Canadian population bumps up from about 30 mil to about 42 mil, most of the increment being Yankees and/or liberals. Toronto won't be the big duck in the little pond anymore, so they might not be so enthusiastic about it; and the idiots running Vancouver with the help of their old college shower-buddies back in Ottawa will suddenly find themselves lost, lost in a sea of 5-6 million suddenly-empowered conservative Canadians who suddenly just remembered where they "lost" their unregistered autoloader rifles and shotguns, in a United States that has just dumped 12,000,000 Gorebot votes overboard -- and Hillary, their hive queen.

In the States, all the "mainstream media" are suddenly as foreign-national de jure as they've always been de facto, and all of a sudden the country's political center of gravity is the Midwest, home of Rush Limbaugh and John Ashcroft, politically and geographically halfway between the Old Confederacy and the Left Coast, which will suddenly begin to discover new depths of meaning in the word "patronize".

Sounds even better, doesn't it?

[O.C. - Old Cracker]

LOL! Thanks for the encouragment!

[Eaker]

It took so long to post that I was able to correct the signature.

Technically not a dual ping or post.

;<)

[VRWCmember]

What makes these cannucks think that the US even wants to take them on as part of the US? (No offense, Argh.)

It makes absolutely no sense.

[katana]

If we were to absorb the whole country the electoral balance in the USA would be heavily pushed to the left. We neither want nor need any more Boston, San Francisco, or West Palm Beach types advocating voluntary suicide by jihad. Now if we could cherry pick the western provinces and leave the rest to stew in their own juices, the idea might be attractive.

[Little Ray]

No offense, but what makes the Canadians think they are invited to the party?

Maybe the NW Canadians, but not Ottawa...