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My Son and War
Painfully typed in from the American Legion Magazine, Vol, 156, No. 1, pp. 30-31 | January 2004 | Frank Schaeffer

Posted on 03/06/2004 9:06:29 AM PST by sauropod

I read this article in the laundromat yesterday. I found it to be a powerful indictment on "Military Families Speak Out." It is not online at the American Legion Magazine Web site, so i typed it in. 'Pod

My Son and War: A once-skeptical father shares his perspective on military parenthood.

By Frank Schaeffer

I write novels for a living and never served in the military. My two older children did the expected: Georgetown and New York University. Our kind - higher-education-worshipping denizens of the North Shore, north of Boston - rarely enlist these days. In 1999, my youngest son, John, was the only senior graduating from his exclusive private high school to join the military. As I write, he is in the Middle East on his second deployment as a U.S. Marine.

After reading an opinion piece I wrote for The Washington Post - about the wrenching adjustment I made from ambivalence toward our military to proud support for my Marine - Gen. James L. Jones (then commandant of the Marine Corps, now chief of NATO), wrote to me, "There has been a 'disconnect' between the men and women who defend our nation and those who are the beneficiaries of that service." The "disconnect" to which Jones refers is illustrated by the contrast between most parents of military personnel and Americans who will not even allow their children's high schools to give their names and addresses to recruiters.

Under the No Child Left Behind Act, schools are required to give the names of graduating students to recruiters. Some parents find it unbearable that their children might be asked to even consider serving. In a New York Times article, Donna Lieberman, executive director of the New York Civil Liberties Union, says, "Students have a right to not be bothered by agressive military recruiters." School-board members in the San Francisco area said they were working to thwart the "dangerous" law.

Apparently some parents, failing to thwart the recruiter and their child's choice to serve, never reconcile themselves with their feelings about military service. An antiwar organization called "Military Families Speak Out" was formed in 2002 by parents and relatives of servicemembers. Speak Out claims to represent military parents against our liberation of Iraq. The Group's Web site is linked ot a grab bag of anti-globalization and pacifist groups. Speak Out exploits an emotional antiwar tactic: it prints letters on its Web site from frightened parents and children of soldiers pleading with the president to let their mommies, daddies, sons or daughters come home.

What are the factors contributing to the existence of groups like Speak Out? Fear is an obvious reason. But a number of other underlying factors exist. Class is one; the rise of anti-military and anti-traditional-male, politically correct ideology is another.

At one time, our military was drawn from a true cross section of society. Even the Ivy League contributed its fair share - until my generation came along. We were the "60s generation." Some of us served. Many, including me, did not. Vietnam was our excuse. I say excuse because since that war ended, the upper classes - especially the most educated - never regained any sense of moral obligation to serve, let alone the desire to see their children volunteer.

Harvard's memorial wall tells the story. It has many names form World War I and World War II on it, a few from Korea, a handful from Vietnam and none since. Now it's rare to find members of Congress who voluntarily served, much less their children.

The absence of the educated and wealthy elite from our military exacerbates the sense that something un-American and unfair is going on when "my kid" gets sent to war and "rich kids" do not. A country where fairly shared sacrifice is the norm might be less apt to breed groups like Speak Out.

What of the second factor, the rise of anti-military and anti-traditional-male ideology? Before my generation took its turn at the raising and education of children, oversolicitous, hand-wringing "soccer moms" wailing "Be careful!" were nowhere in sight. Winston Churchill and Gen. George Patton were heroes, and no one use the word "sensitivity" except when describing a rash to their doctor.

Patton would not recognize most of today's pool of potential male recruits. I say "male recruits" because while females serve and serve well, it is the role of boys in our culture that best represents our elite's change in attitude about service and, more fundamentally, about the traditional warror role of young men. I believe this shift has something to do with the climate that produces a type of military parent who wants the military to do anything but fight wars.

What kind of boy would be drafted into Patton's army today? Today's 17-year-old potential recruit - let's call him Gabriel (fictitious name) - is an obese, Ritalin-oppressed young man, soft as a Twinkie. The post-'60s, anti-traditional-male and anti-military views of our educated elite have played a role in shaping Gabriel. He only knows about what were once called "boyhood" or "manly" experiences via grotesque video games and other electronic adentures he vicariously undertakes from a snack-littered couch. If he ever got punched at school, the other kid was suspended for violence. If his teacher spanked him, she was fired or maybe jailed. If Gabriel ever read "Huckleberry Finn," he related to the robust protagonist the way a chubby goldfish trapped in a small glass bowl might gape incredulously at a 600-pound Blue Fin slicing his way through the open ocean.

Unlike teachers of the World War II era, too many of Gabriel's instructors see no virtue in martial skills, let alone military service. His teacher is most likely a politically correct, speech-code-sensitivity-enforcing do-gooder trained to make sure Gabriel does his best to behave like the girls in his class. Gabriel's teacher has commanded Gabriel to have "high self-esteem," for what reason or for what acoomplishment he's never been told. "Force never solves anything," he or she has told Gabriel. If Gabriel's teacher ever mentions the military, it is with a shudder and perhaps a condescending smirk.

The smirk was momentarily replaced by a howl of terrified dismay when 19 hijackers killed 3,000 Americans one bright morning. Suddenly Gabriel's teacher's progressive tolerance of everybody and everything - except traditional males - evaporated. Gabriel, his teacher, and maybe even Gabriel's parents looked around, as if waking from a dream, and fervently hoped there were a few good men and women selfless and strong enough to shoulder an 80-pound pack and sling on an M-16 to defend the rest of us.

There were. Not all young men and women are "Gabriel," and even some who once were, volunteered to be mentally and physically "readjusted" by their drill instructors from "nasty civilians" into America's finest warriors.

We went to war in Afghanistan and Iraq. The military performed brilliantly. But the war was not over in 15 minutes. It wasn't cut to the pace of a TV commercial. Disney had not supplied a happy ending. Our elites did not like to see our military force used. Our war was fought on the ground, not with cruise missiles. Our attention wandered. Some military parents grew impatient. When where their children coming home? What the hell was this word "sacrifice" supposed to mean?

How far will Speak Out go in bedding down with the rabble of America-haters that inflict themselves on the rest of us through the worldwide peace movement? Would the founders of Speak Out have walked out on the Columbia University associate professor [Nicholas DiGenova] who, according to The New York Times, told thousands of students and faculty at a "peace teach-in" in March that he would like to see the United States suffer "a million Mogadishus"? Maybe members of Speak Out don't go that far. But, as the parents of military men and women, they sure have some strange bedfellows.

Like myself, most military parents honor the fact that our children took an oath to serve. Most of us are more patient than members of the chattering classes who write editorials about how our American policy is failing in the Middle East. Most of us know that even if it does fail, we must still try to transform the breeding grounds of hopelessness, terror and oppression into places where freedom and human rights are given a chance. Most military parents know that World War II lasted almost five years. Germany took 20 years to reconstruct. We still have troops in Korea, Japan and Germany. We know that the Middle East is a complex mess and that the chaotic "crescent of instability," stretching from the horn of Africa through the Middle East and all the way to Indonesia, cannot be allowed to continue breeding violent anti-American terrorists.

My Marine has my absolute support, even though I feel sick at the thought that he could be hurt, or worse. I pray my way through each day and many lonely nights. He is engaged in a noble undertaking. I think most military parents feel as I do, though maybe the press doesn't quote us as often as it trumpets the fears of a few oversolicitous hand-wringing military "soccer moms" (and dads) wailing "Be careful!" as their sons and daughters try to defend us. I hope such parents come to understand that they are putting our children at risk by making us look weak and divided to terrorists who already dismiss us as soft.


TOPICS: Activism/Chapters; Foreign Affairs; Front Page News; News/Current Events; Philosophy; War on Terror
KEYWORDS: antiwar; banglist; frankschaeffer; gabriel; militaryfamilies; speakout
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To: Joee
Its actually worse than that. Every few years or so, someone comes along to "reinvent" the acquisition process. There are a lot of stupid ideas that are floating around out there and that are being implemented that are detrimental to keeping our forces well-equipped. I've seen it firsthand.
81 posted on 03/06/2004 11:06:56 AM PST by sauropod (I intend to have Red Kerry choke on his past.)
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To: sauropod
see#78
82 posted on 03/06/2004 11:07:30 AM PST by MEG33 (John Kerry's been AWOL for two decades on issues of National Security!)
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To: Burkeman1
. . . got the silver star when medals still meant something (unlike in Viet Nam where Kerry got his medals).

My medals mean something to me. A despicable statement you make.

83 posted on 03/06/2004 11:08:52 AM PST by leadpenny
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To: MEG33
Well, at least i remained civil ;=)
84 posted on 03/06/2004 11:09:32 AM PST by sauropod (I intend to have Red Kerry choke on his past.)
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To: sauropod
My son just graduated in 2003. I remember when he was born thinking I never want my son to go to war. Of course that is a fear thing for our own flesh and blood to die. When he graduated he said I will register for the draft and I would defend our country. I was very proud of him for that statement. He then chose to go to Youth with a Mission in Australia where he has been for 6 months in God's army and he returns tomorrow. I have no doubt that if he was drafted that he would take with him an awesome testimony of God's love and the growth that he has experienced in YWAM. My son has taught me not to judge others by their appearance as when he returns he may have a nose piercing or lip piercing and a short mohawk but he has a wonderful heart, loves God, and loves his country. So when we see youth with this appearance it does not mean they would automatically be draft dodgers or flag burners.

Pray for his flight home today and direction for his life...oh and I pray for the other young men and women wherever they are stationed as if they were my own...I do like to pray that God would give them eyes to see the weapons that are formed against them.
85 posted on 03/06/2004 11:12:41 AM PST by LADYAK
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To: leadpenny
NO at all- medals were handed out like water in Viet Nam. I stand by that as will my father and many vets of that war. Kerry's "purple hearts" were nothing. You got one by getting malaria in Viet Nam.
86 posted on 03/06/2004 11:12:43 AM PST by Burkeman1
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To: sauropod
You are a good person....;)
87 posted on 03/06/2004 11:12:55 AM PST by MEG33 (John Kerry's been AWOL for two decades on issues of National Security!)
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To: Burkeman1
Were you there?
88 posted on 03/06/2004 11:16:53 AM PST by leadpenny
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To: leadpenny
It just gets worse when it is fed.A person who has never been to war knows everything.

Thank you for your service to our country.
89 posted on 03/06/2004 11:17:21 AM PST by MEG33 (John Kerry's been AWOL for two decades on issues of National Security!)
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To: leadpenny
Nope. But had direct relatives who were there and medals were a joke. Care to dispute this on a vererans of that war web site? Kerry's medals were a joke and I know that from third hand info.
90 posted on 03/06/2004 11:21:00 AM PST by Burkeman1
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To: MEG33; Burkeman1
There were people who received valorious awards in Vietnam who did not deserve them. I know, I saw it happen. But that was such a small number. Meritorious awards (Bronze Star, ARCOM, Air Medal, etc.) were abused at a much higher rate. That does not take away from the tens of thousands of legitimate awards that were given for acts of bravery. Burkeman1 slanders the memory of all veterans.
91 posted on 03/06/2004 11:26:41 AM PST by leadpenny
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To: LADYAK
We no longer have the draft.
92 posted on 03/06/2004 11:27:39 AM PST by MEG33 (John Kerry's been AWOL for two decades on issues of National Security!)
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To: Burkeman1
I spit on what you think.
93 posted on 03/06/2004 11:28:10 AM PST by leadpenny
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To: sauropod
Under the No Child Left Behind Act, schools are required to give the names of graduating students to recruiters. Some parents find it unbearable that their children might be asked to even consider serving. In a New York Times article, Donna Lieberman, executive director of the New York Civil Liberties Union, says, "Students have a right to not be bothered by agressive military recruiters."

When this hag steps up to stop the "aggressive" daily emails that I get, which try to "recruit" me into buying Viagra, then I'll pay attention to her bullcrap.

That said, great find, 'pod!

94 posted on 03/06/2004 11:28:42 AM PST by NYC GOP Chick
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To: Severa; ohioWfan; mystery-ak
Sorry about the double ping! PING
95 posted on 03/06/2004 11:31:33 AM PST by Maigrey (Oscar winning moment - Michael Moore being squished by an Oliphant.)
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To: leadpenny
What do I think that you "spit on"?
96 posted on 03/06/2004 11:32:45 AM PST by Burkeman1
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To: leadpenny; armymarinedad
There is no excuse for insulting our armed services,their families,our veterans.

It grieves me.I am sorry anyone is subjected to this.There is absolutely no excuse for it.
97 posted on 03/06/2004 11:38:59 AM PST by MEG33 (John Kerry's been AWOL for two decades on issues of National Security!)
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To: MoJo2001
Great stuff ~ Bump!

We are winning ~ the bad guys are losing ~ trolls, terrorists, democrats and the mainstream media are sad ~ very sad!

~~ Bush/Cheney 2004 ~~

98 posted on 03/06/2004 11:40:31 AM PST by blackie (Be Well~Be Armed~Be Safe~Molon Labe!)
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To: Burkeman1
You're incredible! You make outrageous general statements based on what Kerry may or may not have done, and expect people to take you seriously.

Timothy McVeigh was produced by Gulf War I. Everyone who was in Gulf War I is like Timothy McVeigh. How's that for biggoted stupid logic?
99 posted on 03/06/2004 11:46:26 AM PST by leadpenny
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To: Burkeman1
It would seem that you essentially agree with kerry in his description of Viet nam Vets. Not everybody goes south most are made stronger by keeping their nation strong.
100 posted on 03/06/2004 11:54:51 AM PST by FRMAG
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