JACKO ABUSE ACCUSER, KIN STILL LIVING A NIGHTMARE 10 YRS. LATER

New York Post ^ | November 23, 2003 | LINDA STASI

[Bubba_Leroy]

ACCUSING Michael Jackson of sexual abuse comes with a hefty price tag.

A decade after shocking the world with allegations in 1993 that he was molested by the bizarro superstar, the lives of a California man and his relatives remain a living hell.

[LaraCroft]

Grown men do hug and kiss other peoples children and it does not mean they are pedophiles. As a matter of fact, most child molestation is done BY fathers and step fathers so that 'other peoples kids' argument is spurious at best.

My cousin was molested when a young girl, by her father, and as an adult she said how much it meant to her that my father acted normal around her, giving her the same hugs and kisses that all the kids got.

I volunteer at a local hospital in the childrens ward. I cuddle babies. I play with the older kids, whether they want to read, play games or just be held for a half hour with someone stroking their forehead and humming to them. You are saying that ONLY parents can touch their children? No foster parents? No adopted parents?

It is sad to me that normal love is suspect because of a few sick people. And you can teach your kids about appropriate behaviour, and they know what makes them uncomfortable. Most importantly, you never leave your children from your care or someone you trust implicitly. Most kids that are abused are done so at the either the hands of a parent or left by the parent with someone they know (or should know) is unsuitable. You dont' leave your kids alone with neighbors, or relatives that you don't know or trust.

I don't care who has a problem with me cuddling with kids. Mine are older now, 13, 15, 22 and they are all healthy loving darlings. They don't hug and kiss people they are not comfortable with.

As a matter of fact, not loving kids enough probably makes them more vulnerable to abuse by an adult who is manipulating them, because they need the love and affection so badly. Boundaries come from confidence, not fear. Or maybe a little fear, lol, but mostly from knowledge and trust of their feelings.

I haven't read the Jackson charges, I haven't been following the story, I really could care less and don't consider it news. The parents who are leaving their children there are responsible for their safety, not me, but it pains me greatly to see cuddling cast in the same boat as pedophilia.

[AdamSelene235]

bump

[GWfan]

Do you know the rehab success rate of pedophiles? If my memory proves right, it is only 3%.

[cajungirl]

Something very low, I don't know the percentages but they are nearly hopeless in terms of changing. Their pattern is multiple victims over many years and appearing guilty and remorseful when caught but it is a sham. They are sorry they are caught, not that they did it.

As to the issue of cuddling and love. I think it comes up because that is how Jackkson presents himself and how he gets kids ensnared. Noone is suggesting parents should not love children and hug them etc. Some of us think parents are the ones who teach boundaries with non relatives and that sort of thing. Some of us think children over a young age belong in their own beds and not in relatives or non relatives beds. But noone here has said parents should love and give affection to their kids. It is just that some believe Jackson's schtick and that is disturbing.

[cajungirl]

All pedophiles cuddle and hug,,,not all who cuddle and hug are pedophiles. I think that is what is being said. I think other responses were addressing your perceived naivete not huggling or kissing. And I do believe your saying your father hugged and kissed and cuddled the kids of your friends. Some think that is unwise. But to not want pedophilia to interfere with "hugging kissing etc" is fine as long as one doesn't pretend pedophilia doesn't exist unless they see it with their own eyes. And unless one doesn't pretend that the pedophilic is not among one's own relatives and friends. It is wise to be cautious with your own children and to be cautious with your own behavior especially if you are male.

[Barnacle]

I do feel sorry for Jackson and feel that while weird, he is probably just still a 5 year old boy trying to have a childhood.

[cajungirl]

Yeah, how many five year old boys trying to have a life do we all know who possess millions of bucks, years of a successful career, a marriage, a number of charges of criminal behavior. And how many of the little darlings are described as tyrants, have their personal disneyland with petting zoo, go to toys r us and let everyone buy what they want. And how many little helpless five year olds get their buddies over for mutual masturbation, french kissing, fondling and love letters. Gee, he is just a helpless child. Sickens me that anyone buys that excuse.

[Dante3]

Corection: the mob figure associated with Micheal Jackson is Malnik (not Malkin)

[luckystarmom]

If I was around my dad I would still cuddle with him, and I'm 41 and he is 75.

I certainly cuddle with him when I lived at home.

I don't think that is inappropriate at all.

[GOPJ]

bump

[Bubba_Leroy]

If I was around my dad I would still cuddle with him, and I'm 41 and he is 75.

Thank you. I would hate to think that I have to stop hugging, kissing and cuddling my daughters just because there are perverts in the world.

[hasegawasama]

By the time the kids are teenagers, why would you do any of that? Aren't they too old? Isn't that something they would only do with their boyfriend/girlfriend

[lonevoice]

It's not oral sex, it's not sodomy. IT'S BAD and the punishment should be harsh. My point is that it's not as bad as murder. I don't see how anyone can disagree with me.

The Santa Barbara District Attorney's office has said that he [Jackson]will be charged under section 288(a) of the California Penal Code, which outlaws "lewd or lascivious acts" against a child under the age of 14. "[The law] requires that there be some touching of the body of the child or the outside part of the clothing of the child by the alleged perpetrator," DeSales explained. "It can include rape, it can include sodomy, it can include oral copulation, things like that. But it does require some touching by the adult with the minor somewhere on his body."

link

[Luis Gonzalez]

"...the crime of the parents for subjecting their child to a known pedophile."

I have a big problem with that statement, in spite of all the allegations, Jackson is not a "known" pedophile.

Unfortunately, the first case was never brought to Court, and it's MY opinion that the parents opted not to prosecute, had they truly wished to go to Court, I don't think they could have been stopped.

They took money instead.

I've asked myself how much money I would require to stop the prosecution of the man who molested my children, and I have yet to come up with a figure.

How much would you require?

I don't trust the parents in the original case.

Now, FOX News reports that this kid's mother acussed her ex-husband (the boy's father) of molesting their son (same kid) a few years back, and that her ex says that she's unstable enough to make up this whole thing.

The State dropped all charges.

[luckystarmom]

No. Hugging and kissing between a boyfriend/girlfriend is a sexual thing.

The nice thing about hugging, kissing, cuddling a parent is that it isn't sexual, and it just is comforting.

I haven't sat next to my dad in a long time with his arms around me. He's not going to be around much longer, and this thread is making me want to hug him for a long time the next time I see him.

[LisaMalia]

When I slept with my babies, from birth to teen I would give them backrubs and kisses. There is nothing close to molestation in that, and so far that is all I've heard Jackson accused of. Of course, the new charges seem to be more serious, but until they name them, I'll leave off comment. I do feel sorry for Jackson and feel that while weird, he is probably just still a 5 year old boy trying to have a childhood.

People like you are "enablers", contributing to Jackson thriving in the pervert business for years. While you feel sorry for Jackson, I feel sorry for the innocent children who this child molester has ruined for life.

[LisaMalia]

Very well said. I agree 100%.

[bonfire]

I will concur that he is not a known pedophile. BUT, knowing what you know, would you have subjected your kid to overnights at his house?

Something smells fishy here. I've said for days that these parents need to be investigated. I'm wondering if some of these parents aren't using their kids, ie. putting them in Jackson's household, to extort money from him.

Even if the parents are totally innocent of extortion, they should have their heads examined.

[Hildy]

You're quoting someone that MTV dug up. I'm quoting the exact penal code which reads:

From the California Penal Code Section 288(a): Any person who willfully and lewdly commits any lewd or lascivious act, including any of the acts constituting other crimes provided for in Part 1, upon or with the body, or any part or member thereof, of a child who is under the age of 14 years, with the intent of arousing, appealing to, or gratifying the lust, passions, or sexual desires of that person or the child, is guilty of a felony and shall be punished by imprisonment in the state prison for three, six, or eight years.

this 288(a) says just what it says above. The subsequent numbers (b) (c) etc. elaborate. When the Santa Barbara guy was giving his news conference, he made it a point to say that it wasn't oral copulation, just LEWD AND lascivious behavior. He pointed it out because he didn't want the press to get it wrong. I dug up a transcript of the news conference yesterday, I'll try to find it again today to make sure what I'm saying is backed up. But I think this kind of thing that MTV is putting out is exactly what he was trying to stop.

[cajungirl]

Jackson might not be a known pedophile in your book, but do you think it odd that he is a known pedophile in many other's books. There are jokes on national tv about jackson's proclivities. If you don't see that he is known as a pedophile and wonder why others see him as that then you are mightly willing to ignore smoke all around.