Limbaugh May Have Avoided Speeding Tickets (Humor)

Sloth | November 19, 2003 | Sloth

[Sloth]

WEST PALM BEACH, Fla. (AP) — Authorities are investigating whether Rush Limbaugh, already reeling from drug problems and his expulsion from ESPN, may have driven his vehicle just below the posted speed limits on numerous occasions, a law enforcement source who spoke on condition of anonymity said Wednesday.

As long as four years ago, local law enforcement manning Florida DUI checkpoints and 'speed traps' repeatedly clocked the ultraconservative demagogue at anywhere from one to six miles per hour below the applicable speed limits. Unconfirmed reports indicate that Limbaugh was also seen proceeding through intersections while traffic lights were yellow. One officer who declined to be named told the AP that he had personally observed Limbaugh cruising at 43 in a 45 MPH zone. No charges were filed at that time.

Critics contend that Limbaugh drove very close to the speed limit on at least 30 or 40 occasions, most likely with the deliberate intent of getting to his destination while avoiding tickets for speeding.

Limbaugh's attorney, Roy Black, did not return a phone call for comment Wednesday.

[Igraine]

What's wrong with avoiding government attention?

[Born Conservative]

Maybe someone will start a Rush ping list.

You mean like this?

[NeoCaveman]

Rush adjusted his Select Comfort Sleep Number Bed in order to avoid getting a bad nights sleep. Will the horrors ever end?

[cyborg]

What next??? Are palm trees going to grow in my yard now? pfft... how dare he :-)

[Born Conservative]

Oops! Forgot to ping the rest of the list...

[1776USA]

Undislosed news sources, spoken in anonomity, reports that
Rush is a Homo Sapian and has heterosexual Tendencies.

It is also reported that he has been known to emit CO2
in he air several times daily.

[veronica]

I heard about this while I was listeniing to Rush today. :)

Fame for Sloth!

[TYVets]

What do you charge for your autograph?

[Mudboy Slim]

I found it by surfing over to Rush's website...this was the first thing to pop up, with a link to FR.com!!

That's better than the ol' link to Drudge's site...MUD

[LowCountryJoe]

What happened to Bronco_Buster_Fedayeen? Or was that Bronco_Buster_Fatwa?

Semper Infidelis (Alway's an Infidel - in the jihad sense)

Joe

[LucyJo]

the results of FREE REPUBLIC has
.......FREEPERCUSSIONS

---

YES!!!...and more so every day, thank goodness!

[sanchmo]

Those who make the Rush Limbaugh show have no further need to engage in shameless self-bumpery.

There's no need for auto-bumpery.
When Laz provides the leg-humpery.

[4everontheRight]

"Rush is one hell of a soldier for OUR side and I will stick by him NO MATTER WHAT."

Here, here!! Good for you! Rush has done more for the conservative cause than I can recall anyone doing within the past 30 years! He single handedly saved AM on your radio as well as gave balance to a media gone mad, mad, mad!! Mad I tell you....blah, blah, mad.........mad!!!!!!!

I consider Rush a true great American and I say that about very few people! You have to work hard to get that title in my book. You earn it...you don't expect it or demand it. He has earned it and deserves more respect than I could possibly award him through words.

[LowCountryJoe]

Awe man, you've got the doggie-hug on the humor with that blast. You're gellin' like a fellon!

[thiscouldbemoreconfusing]

This is too good to just bookmark, I'm adding it to my favorites.

[Lazamataz]

Dare I admit, that I've been on Rush five or six times? Once he read an entire editorial on the air that I had written and focused his whole show segment on it. What does that get me from Laz?

Close your eyes.

Open your mouth.

Place all of your trust in me.

[null and void]

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[null and void]

You sure got thru booking fast! (Gotta love the Santa Barbara PD...)

[thiscouldbemoreconfusing]

That's nothing. My best friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who's going with the girl who saw Rush actually go through the express lane at the supermarket with MORE than 15 items. Scandalous!!
Ah, but now the rest of the story, you see, Rush went through with 15 items, that is true, but what has not been divulged is that he returned six items so that he would have only 15 items as he went through the express line for 20 items or less. Store management is looking at this very carefully, it was, after all, recorded on the stores infamous infrared night vison equipped security cameras placed strategically behind one way mirrors thoroughout the store.

Now you have the rest of the story.

[thiscouldbemoreconfusing]

The media have a "Rush" and "Bush" thing going on inside their toadie little minds.

toadie little minds, toadie little minds in deed, do you have any proof that they have toadie little minds? For that matter, do you have any proof that the likes of peter jennings have any mind at all? toadie little minds, toadie little minds in deed.