Davis and group come to mind!
They need to be removed!
calgov2002:
 calgov2002: for old calgov2002 articles. calgov2002: for new calgov2002 articles. Other Bump Lists at: Free Republic Bump List Register |
Posted on 08/05/2002 6:35:00 AM PDT by 1bigdictator
THE DEMOCRATS AND THEIR DISMAL-ISMS
By: Norman Liebmann
The Democrats are the Party of Re-writing Scripture-ism - the Democrat version of Genesis now starts, "In the beginning was the tax."
The Democrats are the Party of Greater Inner City-ism - where the O.J. Simpson trial established there is no difference between an ethnic joke and an ethnic jury.
The Democrats are the Party of Counterfeit Piety-ism - at the end of their terms in the Senate, Hillary Clinton, Barbara Boxer and Dianne Feinstein will retire to a nunnery called The Sisters of Treason.
The Democrats are the Party of Vermont-ism - that sexual Cuisinart next door to New Hampshire. It is the only landfill to have achieved statehood. Its residents believe God created Democrats so the folks in Vermont could be identified by something more objectionable than just their sexual mores.
The Democrats are The Party of Jesse Jackson-ism - and the institutionalizing of reverse bigotry, black rainbows, and telling a wife when she feels amorous, "I gave at the office."
The Democrats are the Party of Gimme-ism - who buy votes by making every piece of legislation a Marshall Plan for misfits. Having done this, it is the job of the Democrats in the House of Representative to distribute the crumbs. It is the job of the Democrats in the Senate to make sure there aren't any crumbs.
The Democrats are the Party of Hillary-ism - the term Hillary-ism describes the feminist who is just a vowel away from being called a twit.
The Democrats are the Party of Conformity-ism - its creature, political correctness, turned out to be a vampire. A few conservative journalists keep writing its obituary until somebody thinks of a way to kill it.
The Democrats are the Party of Katie Couric-ism and Margaret Carlson-ism - and other rabid chipmunks with trivial political opinions. Like most female journalists, they think everything they say is true, especially if they say it while crossing their legs.
The Democrats are the Party of Flunky-ism - the opinion of that bloated cipher, Bill Richardson, (remember him?) can always be counted on to confirm any opinion of the last person he spoke to.
The Democrats are the Party of Political Pantomime - for a political contribution, Barbara Boxer or Dianne Feinstein will describe to you how lady Democrats fake sincerity in the Senate and orgasm in the sack.
The Democrats are the Party of Primitive Religion-ism - one way of observing the high holidays is by advising the celebrants to be careful not to step in the Kawanzaa.
The Democrats are the Party of Choice-ism - in which everyone is given a choice except the fetus.
The Democrats are the Party of Female Liberation-ism - its liberated members are called Libstitutes.
The Democrats are the Party of Soccer Mom-ism - who do not know that when their husbands go into men's rooms, they stand in front of the urinals and fantasize that they have Bill Clinton by the neck.
The Democrats are the Party of Political Correctness-ism - a form of Fascism which replaced those roughhouse games of croquet in the Ivy League.
The Democrats are the Party of Inclusion-ism - which is tantamount to a lifetime dues-free membership in a leper colony.
The Democrats are the Party of Gibberish-ism - the world still laughs at the mention of the word Ebonics - that absurd patois known in the Ivy League as Affirmative English. Consistently, it is expected Harvard will soon establish a Rodney King School of Driving and a Greta Van Susteren School of Code Blue Orthodontia. [Note: Yale now offers courses in Black English (Blinglish 101). Caucasian students can enroll sounding like William F. Buckley Jr. and graduate sounding like Jesse Jackson.]
The Democrats are the Party of Hypocrisy-ism - which promulgates as its basic tenet that everyone has a right to his own religion - as long as he doesn't practice it.
The Democrats are the Party of Interior Decorator-ism - one of whom has already re-vamped Barbra Streisand's anthem to be called "People Who Love Purple." (We assume purple is "in.")
The Democrats are the Party of Rosie O'Donnell-ism - who put that unsightly bulge in the airwaves.
The Democrats are the Party of the United Nations-ism - unlimited support for America-sponsored international welfare, and headquarters for world de-civilization. (Every delegate must arrive wearing a dead leopard and carry a nose bone in his wallet for identification.)
The Democrats are the Party of Recipient-ism - distributing welfare checks along with supermarket coupons that are exchangeable for heroin-enriched Fruit Loops.
The Democrats are the Party of Cover up Journalism-ism - the liberal press is still trying to keep it from the American people that FDR was disabled. A retired KGB agent swore he saw Roosevelt's leg braces enshrined at the Kremlin.
The Democrats are the Party of Cultural Vulgarization-ism - that debases art with museum photographic exhibitions of genitalia. Their exhibit was cancelled when the curators found they could attract the same type of art lovers by just taking the doors off the rest rooms.
The Democrats are the Party of Feminism-ism - the movement is still out to make testosterone a controlled substance.
The Democrats are the Party of Street People-ism - with panhandlers proclaiming their ingratitude by rallying in Washington for The Million Shopping Cart March.
The Democrats are the Party of Minority-ism- who maintain their privileges by outnumbering the majority. (Don't do the math.)
The Democrats are the Party of Union-ism- who proved conclusively that a cure for insomnia is watching reruns of Welcome Back Kotter, or a job on the Federal Payroll.
The Democrats are the Party of Chad Dimpling-ism- a sexual practice by Floridians over the age of eighty. (As a result of the 2000 election, gerontologists now believe a Floridian over the age of eighty is a living redundancy.)
The Democrats are the Party of Abortion-ism - Henny Youngman said, "Take my wife - please." The Democrats added, "While you're at it, take my baby, too." (Democrats in California have made it legal to get a third trimester extirpation at a drive up window.)
The Democrats are the party of Empowered Poverty-ism - they improved the morale of minority voters by convincing them that, despite the conventional wisdom, beggars can be choosers.
The Democrats are the Party of Social Promotion-ism - that means every minority student that reaches the age of sixteen must be moved up into the third grade whether or not he has finally mastered the spelling of "cat."
The Democrats are the Party of Affirmative Action-ism - making it possible to have a computer in every cotton field. If they decide they don't like picking cotton, they can just Control/Alt/Delete it.
The Democrats are the Party of Power Blackout-ism - California Governor Gray Davis has made it necessary to run to your next door neighbor in the middle of the night to borrow a cup of electricity.
The Democrats are the Party of Liberal Journalist-ism - which has revealed journalism is not a profession, but a virus.
Democrats are the Party of 40% as a Passing Grade - ism - which provides upward mobility for the ignorant, the dense, and the rest of the motherflunkers.
The Democrats are the Party of Gun Control-ism - to keep rapists and murderers safe from citizens vicious enough to try to defend themselves.
The Democrats are the Party of Fertility in Denial-ism whose celebrants have made abortion clinics into their places of worship.
The Democrats are the Party of Barney Frank-ism - whose gender demonstrates that anything can happen when defective chromosomes copulate.
The Democrats are the party of Tom Daschle-ism and Robert Torricelli-ism - who are often invited to make themselves available in the homes of people who raise pythons and other pets with a taste for small rodents.
The Democrats are the Party of Environmental-ism - who want to keep the woods pristine by compelling the bears to go potty at Chevron Stations.
The Democrats are the Party of Hollywood-ism - where writers, actors and directors live with the morbid apprehension that they might not get a job that they really don't want.
The Democrats are the Party of Underarm Odor-ism - without which the aroma of politics might have to relocate under some other part of the body.
The Democrats are the Party of Euphem-ism - references to specific genders are determined to be politically incorrect. The term bisexual is unwelcome and henceforth to be replaced by the term "a personal of coincidental gender." (Say, what?) These people of the AC/DC persuasion will also be obliged to carry a special condom made by Rayovac.
The Democrats are the Party of Amnesty-ism - which will render immune from prosecution all illegal aliens, undocumented child molesters, and people given to the inhuman practice of picking kumquats before they reach the age of consent.
The Democrats are the party of Political Pablum-ism - which seeks to change the American form of government from a Democracy to Day Care.
The Democrats are the Party of the Artsy/Craftsy-ism - and are supporters of programmers at PBS who don't know the difference between a recital and a rectal.
The Democrats are the Party of Bill Clinton-ism - the only ex-President to have earned the title Traitor-Emeritus.
The Democrats have a lot of isms. Too bad they don't believe in any of them.
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Norman Liebmann is a free-lance political commentator and staff writer for Ether Zone.
Norman Liebmann can be reached at firehat@adelphia.net
We also invite you to visit his website - Fire Hat
Published in the August 12, 2002 issue of Ether Zone. Copyright © 1997 - 2002 Ether Zone.
We invite your comments on this article in our forum!
Or did I miss it?
Davis and group come to mind!
They need to be removed!
calgov2002:
|
calgov2002: for old calgov2002 articles. calgov2002: for new calgov2002 articles. Other Bump Lists at: Free Republic Bump List Register |
Whine-ism, Starbucks-ism, me-tooism, kneepad-ism, Borg-ism, rent-a-mob-ism, incite-a-riot-ism, idol-ism, Bono-ism, Chomsky-ism...
bttt
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