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MEN -- ACCORDING TO WOMEN (Hilarious)
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Posted on 01/20/2002 4:53:24 AM PST by MeneMeneTekelUpharsin

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To: OneidaM; riley1992; xsmommy; slip18; seadragon; bella_bru; white rose; gabz; secret garden...
They all start out like grapes, and it's a womans job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with.

OMG, Sis, you found this and didn't tell the coquettes?

LOL!

21 posted on 01/20/2002 5:55:14 AM PST by RikaStrom
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To: DainBramage
They left out men with rohipnol that want to tie you up in the cellar till the end of the movie, when the famous FBI ageent comes busting in.

Personal experience?

22 posted on 01/20/2002 5:55:50 AM PST by afbrat
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To: pocat
To a single young woman looking for fun, married men are (1) a somewhat exotic challenge (i.e. forbidden fruit); (2) most likely not going to want anything more than sex; (3) more seasoned in the art of carnal congress; and (4) probably a bit more emotionally mature than a young man in his late teens or early twenties.
23 posted on 01/20/2002 5:56:17 AM PST by Basil Duke
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To: DainBramage
"They left out men with rohipnol"

Most women don't need a drug that makes their hips larger.

The "date rape" one is rohypnol, and it is illegal in this country.

--Boris

24 posted on 01/20/2002 5:57:03 AM PST by boris
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To: MeneMeneTekelUpharsin
They all start out like grapes, and it's a womans job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with.

They all start out like grapes, and end up like raisins, when the women are done remaking them.

25 posted on 01/20/2002 6:01:09 AM PST by chainsaw
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To: boris
I didn't have a bottle of to look for the spelling.<:)~~

I always refer to the "sound it out" method of spelling, but in Texas it never sounds like its spelled.

26 posted on 01/20/2002 6:04:21 AM PST by DainBramage
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To: pocat
It's a very dangerous game...

People get hurt...

Sometimes fatally!

27 posted on 01/20/2002 6:06:10 AM PST by No!
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To: afbrat
Personal experience?

Want to go out for a drink after work?

28 posted on 01/20/2002 6:06:14 AM PST by DainBramage
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Comment #29 Removed by Moderator

Comment #30 Removed by Moderator

To: RikaStrom
I can't quite get this coquette thing down pat SIS!!!
31 posted on 01/20/2002 6:12:59 AM PST by Neets
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To: MeneMeneTekelUpharsin
10. The men who are somewhat handsome, somewhat nice and have some money and thank God are heterosexual, are shy and NEVER MAKE THE FIRST MOVE!!!!

Not necessarily shy, just tired of being strung along, only to be dumped later in favor of a total a**hole who's better looking and/or has more money, because the woman thinks she's going to stomp on him and turn him into a nice man.

32 posted on 01/20/2002 6:13:18 AM PST by tacticalogic
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To: OneidaM
ROFLOL, that's ok.

I can't wait to see what some of the boys are going to have to say about this. You know they never leave well enough alone. ;-)

33 posted on 01/20/2002 6:16:26 AM PST by RikaStrom
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To: MeneMeneTekelUpharsin
bttt
34 posted on 01/20/2002 6:17:33 AM PST by Don Myers
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To: pocat
WHERE WERE THEY WHEN I WAS SINGLE?!

My guess: Another woman found you to be a good catch (they'll trust one-another's judgement in guys) and, should they succeed in turning your head, it'd be a feather in their cap. The foxier the competition, the bigger the feather :)

35 posted on 01/20/2002 6:20:25 AM PST by budwiesest
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To: MeneMeneTekelUpharsin
And - This directly relates to list above:

WHY MEN CAN NEVER WIN

36 posted on 01/20/2002 6:23:11 AM PST by stlrocket
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To: nocomad
The more I learn about women, the more I like my truck.
37 posted on 01/20/2002 6:32:05 AM PST by Clioman
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To: GalFromTheBay
Of course not. But by and large, a man in his early 30s is less of a jackass than your standard 20-year-old. What's that old saying about men not being worth the powder it would take to blow their heads off until their 30th birthday? A smidgeon of truth in it. But let me say that for the gals, the decade of their twenties is often equally misspent on their own nascent mindsets.
38 posted on 01/20/2002 6:34:46 AM PST by Basil Duke
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To: stlrocket
Had to put it here!

Why Men Just Can't Win

If you work too hard, there is never any time for her.
If you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum.

If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, it's exploitation.
If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your ass and find something better.

If you get a promotion ahead of her, it's favoritism.
If she gets a job ahead of you, it's equal opportunity.

If you mention how nice she looks, it's sexual harassment.
If you keep quiet, it's male indifference.

If you cry, you're a wimp.
If you don't, you're insensitive.

If you make a decision without consulting her, you're a chauvinist pig, you bastard.
If she makes a decision without consulting you, she's a liberated woman.

If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy, that's domination.
If she asks you, it's a favor.

If you try to keep yourself in shape, you're vain.
If you don't, you're a slob.

If you buy her flowers, you're after something.
If you don't, you're not thoughtful.

If you're proud of your achievements, you're an egotist.
If you're not, you're not ambitious.

If she has a headache, she's tired.
If you have a headache, you don't love her anymore, and you must be sleeping around.

39 posted on 01/20/2002 6:34:51 AM PST by No!
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To: MeneMeneTekelUpharsin
Holy sh!t. It has me absolutely pegged. I won't say which one though.
40 posted on 01/20/2002 6:39:43 AM PST by beavus
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