Contraception: The Trojan Horse

hat is the Church's role in guiding our lives? How extensive is it? Does it extend to a couple's bedroom? How do we apply Church teachings to popular trends and widely accepted practices? How do we genuinely gauge our willingness to conform our lives to the teaching of Christ in this day and age?

Is there a more controversial subject within the Catholic Church than the Church's teaching on artificial contraception? Have not most of us utilized some means of contraception, the pill, IUD, condoms? How many of us have had vasectomies or tubal ligations? Statistics show a vast majority of us believe our own views on contraception and the meaning of human sexuality are superior to that of the Church. When it comes to the purpose of sexual relations between a man and a woman, otherwise orthodox Catholics believe their individual consciences reign supreme, despite the explicit teaching of the Church, “Contraception is ‘intrinsically evil” (Catechism of the Catholic Church 2370, hereafter CCC).

The widespread use of contraception amongst Catholics reveals Church teaching alone is insufficient to affect conduct and warrant obedience. One wonders if the Church’s teaching on the Trinity, the Resurrection, the Real Presence of Christ in the Eucharist, the Communion of Saints and other basic dogmas of the faith would be discarded also if they affected our relationships at such a basic level. Sadly, something beyond obedience is necessary for today’s “enlightened” Catholic to accept the Church’s teaching on contraception.

Have we welcomed a Trojan horse into the protected confines of our marriages? We do not have to look beyond our divorce rate, one million plus abortions per year, endemic use of pornography, high rate of co-habitation, out of wedlock births, fatherless families, and other related social developments (these things are bad right?), which have occurred in the second half of the 20th Century to seriously question whether we’ve been sold a bill of goods with contraception.1

What incredible harm is suffered by individuals and couples when they elect to ignore the Church’s (Christ’s) teaching on contraception?

Modern contraception really dawned in the late 1950s and 1960s. Couples were “liberated” from unwanted pregnancy, and were free to plan their lives—free from the responsibility that had accompanied sexual relations. Child bearing was no longer a part of sex—what a deal! It wasn’t until the late 1960s that Pope Paul VI was forced to address the issue of contraception in his famous encyclical Humane Vitae, which is both the most prophetic and ignored encyclical of the modern Church. (Although largely disregarded and much criticized, I’ve found most Catholics have never read the document.) Under the sure protection of the Holy Spirit and against incredible modern policy pressures, Pope Paul VI anticipated—with chilling accuracy—the result of severing the intimacy of the beautiful union between husband and wife from openness to bearing a child. He predicted engaging in sexual relations without regard to openness to life would result in increased sexual infidelity, premarital and extramarital sex, a rise in the rate of abortion, sexual exploitation of women, pornography and widespread divorce. Nonetheless, from Humanae Vitae to the present, American culture has steadfastly maintained that contraception, abortion, divorce on demand, pre-marital sex and the availability of sexually explicit material is necessary for a free and progressive society.

The question remains, why can’t I be a faithful, loving, giving Catholic Christian in a happy marriage and use contraception to responsibly plan our family?

Are sexual relations between husband and wife the same as sex between dogs, livestock and other animals? While many would argue yes, we Catholics know the love between spouses surpasses the base attraction between animals. Human beings were created in a transcendent relationship with our Heavenly Father, i.e. we are children of God (CCC 2367). The Church’s proscription on artificial contraception is based upon the Christian teaching that human beings are unique as God’s children, more specifically upon the incredibly wonderful relationship between spouses and God in the sacrament of marriage. The triune God chose to grant us eternal life through the sacraments. Husband and wife share in the creative power of God and become with God a source of eternal life in the co-creation of a child (CCC 2367).

The Church teaches our marriages are to be a living sign of God’s love for us. We are created to love—not use—one another. Does God give half way? Did God withhold any part of Himself at Gethsemane or Golgotha? No! God gives Himself fully and unconditionally. He communicates Himself to us not just spiritually, not just symbolically, but entirely, body, blood, soul and even divinity. Obviously we reject and debase His love in manifold ways. But the Church teaches—in fact beseeches—us not to debase our marriages by incorporating into the marital relationship what Steve Woods, a nationally renowned Catholic social commentator, calls the “great marriage buster,” contraception. Simply put, contraception is selfishness! Please note the extreme self-focus of the following reasons for using contraception: “We need time for ourselves before kids.” “We need time to get on our feet financially.” “Two kids are all we want or can afford.” “We want to travel.” “We want to retire at 55.” “I'm too tired and old.” “I want the intense physical pleasure of sexual relations without worrying about a baby.” Kids are viewed as a means or impediment to our happiness, something to be managed, rather than a blessing. According to the Catechism, “Children are the ‘supreme gift of marriage’” (CCC 2378). Married couples are called to a sacramental relationship, which includes but transcends mutual sexual pleasure. To artificially sever sexual relations from childbearing introduces “self” at the most basic level in a relationship. Selfishness, like any toxin is not easily controlled once introduced to a marriage.

Pope John Paul II beautifully articulates the proper relationship between Christians in the world and, in particular, the Christ imitating relationship between husband and wife described in the Second Vatican Council’s Pastoral Constitution on the Church In the Modern World. The Holy Father teaches the meaning of human life is to be found in self-giving not self-assertion (Gaudium et Spes 24). Or as he says in a play he wrote before becoming Pope, to become a father is to be liberated from the “terrible” freedom of self-centeredness and to be “conquered by love.”2 “The Law of the Gift written on the human heart is an expression of the self-giving love that constitutes the interior life of God—Father, Son and Holy Spirit,” John Paul explains elsewhere. “To live the law of the gift is to enter, by way of anticipation, into the communion with God for which all humanity was created from the beginning.”

A marital relationship should be based on the “law of the gift.” Marriage should be a relationship in which each spouse gives to the other completely, without reserve emotionally, financially, physically—yes, even sexually. Whenever any component of the human person is withheld, the relationship suffers. Where is intimacy when one spouse withholds financial resources, emotional support, companionship or spiritual support?

Selfishness in any form erodes a marital union and leads to many manifestations of marital disunion. When couples contracept, even strong marriages are deprived of the level of intimacy intended by our Heavenly Father. Using contraception adversely affects relationships and leads to frail and graceless marriages. At worst, children witness a legal divorce, which is a mirror of the intimacy each spouse inadvertently withheld while contracepting.

Ultimately intimacy is trust, and in a truly selfless marriage there must be trust between husband, wife and God our Father. The Church teaches true intimacy in a marriage requires this radical three party trust. Wife must say to her husband, “Here is my body, my life. I give you and God my being; for if I conceive our children are forever.” Husbands must say to their wives, “I give you myself; I’ll always be here to care for you and our children—I’ll love you always.” Husbands and wives must say to God, “We trust You to care for us, to guard us, provide for us and our (Your) children and to lead us to You.”

While it would take pages to detail the manifold negative results of introducing selfishness into human sexual relationships, one does not have to be a rocket scientist to identify certain causes and effects. Extramarital sex prior to effective contraception was not pandemic; likewise, abortion absent societal acceptance of contraception was a rarity; sexual exploitation of women in the form of pornography and unwed pregnancies (an unfortunate byproduct is the fact that contraception is not foolproof) are now rampant.

Most couples won’t admit contraception fosters selfishness in their marriage. Rather, they would argue it liberates them from unwanted and unneeded responsibility. The Church teaches such beliefs are disingenuous. Selfishness is an inevitable consequence of contraception. The mere use of contraception is an obstacle to the intimate relationship between husband and wife and divine participation in their marriage (Humanae Vitae 14 and CCC 2370). Using contraception is a refusal to recognize children as a gift from God, a rejection of the self-sacrifice necessary for raising children, a lack of trust that God will provide for the needs of additional children and a refusal to accept the burdens inherent in childbearing. This type of selfishness fosters materialism, which the Holy Father has identified as a great evil facing this country. American culture views children as a burden, as something to be prevented, as an obstacle to happiness, and is a culture that tolerates abortion. We as a nation have a “contraceptive mentality,” which is a cornerstone of what the Holy Father calls the Culture of Death.

The Church teaches fertility and children are both a gift and an end of marriage (CCC 2366). Children are the living proof of the Church's central teaching that we are fully human when we give of ourselves totally. There is no better example of the joy of total self-donation than that of a parents’ love for their children. Engaging in sexual relations without using contraception and bearing and rising a child together is usually the first time a couple gives everything to another, even unto death. It is no accident the Creator of the universe charges us to marry and multiply; for it is in the love between spouses—manifest in children—that we transcend ourselves and glimpse the love achieved in Christ's sacrifice for us. What greater image of Christ’s sacrifice for us is there than parents giving their lives for their children? Every parent knows the exhausting joy of caring for their children, the late nights, the seemingly endless diapers, the toil of feeding, clothing, and transporting, the ever-present sense of responsibility, the labor of love for our offspring. Parenthood is the grandest lesson in the Paschal mystery—the realization of the basic paradox of Christianity, we are filled when we are emptied.

Using contraception is the naked exertion of human will over the divine goodness and gift of children. Western culture teaches children are valuable only if they are wanted, or only if they can enjoy affluence and education. The Church teaches each child is a marvelous gift of God, notwithstanding circumstances, e.g., handicaps, poverty, lack of education, etc. As Catholics we are confronted with the choice, are we going to view children as Mother Theresa did, or as Planned Parenthood does.

God has a plan for marriage—a beautiful transcendent life of fruitfulness, self-donation and radical trust between spouses and God. Contraception conflicts with God’s plan by introducing selfishness into marital relations. Like the unwitting defenders of Troy, statistics show a majority of Catholic couples embrace contraception as a gift without realizing its is the “great marriage buster.” Considering the use of contraception really boils down to whether Western culture, or the Church of Christ is correct on the issue of contraception. As a Catholic committed to the way, the truth and the life, which do you trust with your happiness, your marriage, your salvation, the world or the Church of Christ? Read Humanae Vitae, read Evangelium Vitae and pray over the “Law of the Gift.” Above all, trust God as a vital participant in your marriage.

1. For those of you whose environmental views are such that you believe contraception is a necessity required to avoid a malthusean human catastrophe, I must simply respond: (1) objective studies by the UN show such concerns are scientifically not true; (2) morally, even if overpopulation did exist, fertility is not a disease subject to immunization. Contraception, abortion, euthanasia and other techniques of human culling are not the answer to social problems (Evangelium Vitae 57).

2. Cited in Weigel, George. Witness to Hope. New York: Cliff Street Books, 1999. p. 218.

Greg Weiler is a partner at Partner, Palmieri, Tyler, Wiener, Wilhelm & Waldron LLP specializing in transactional real estate law. He is one of five founding members of the St. Thomas More Society of Orange County, California. He and his wife, Mary Lou, have 4 children, and are members of St. Edward's Parish in Dana Point, California.

Excellent post, but if I might add further.

Marriage is both a covenant and sacrament. As a covenant, it reflects and is an icon of the covenant of supernatural life and love that exists between Christ and His Church.

Of its very essence, a covenant is supposed to be a life-giving or life-exchanging relationship. To deny the life-giving aspect of Christian marriage on any occasion is to deny the very essence of the covenant that exists between the spouses, and also is to destroy the iconography of the relationship of Christ to His bride.

Just as all covenants are renewed by a sacrificial self-offering, so the covenant of marriage is renewed when spouses sacrificially offer their bodies and their fertility to one another. To withold this self-giving offering in any way is to deny the covenant, and the parties to it thus become mere objects of use and abuse.

As Christ gives his Body unreservedly and completely selflessly to his bride, the Church, in the Holy sacrifice of the Mass, in the daily renewal of the New and Everlasting Covenant, Christian spouses are called to do no less when they renew their marital covenant.

From the above, I think it is quite legitimate to extrapolate the sacramental analogy between the Mass and Marriage, and so conclude that contraception is the sacramental equivalent of going forward to receive communion and then spitting the Sacred Host back into the face of the priest who stands there in persona Christi capita - in the person of Christ the Bridegroom.

I sometimes wonder that if priests were to put the sin in these rather blunt terms to their congregations, it might convict at least some of them of their transgression, but also throw light on the countless sacriligious communions that are being made every day.

From the article:

"Ultimately intimacy is trust, and in a truly selfless marriage there must be trust between husband, wife and God our Father. The Church teaches true intimacy in a marriage requires this radical three party trust. Wife must say to her husband, “Here is my body, my life. I give you and God my being; for if I conceive our children are forever.” Husbands must say to their wives, “I give you myself; I’ll always be here to care for you and our children—I’ll love you always.” Husbands and wives must say to God, “We trust You to care for us, to guard us, provide for us and our (Your) children and to lead us to You.” "

Maybe it's just me and what I see, but the way things are "set up" now, this isn't happening. The people I know who are getting married don't approach it this way at all.

This is the single best sentence I have read on this subject. I am always saddened when I find church-going Catholics (hard to call them 'practicing Catholics') who use artificial birth control.

I used to be of the opinion that as long as the birth control wasn't an abortificant, it was OK. That was before I came back to the church. There are many teachings of the church that are sometimes hard to follow simply because of our busy lives, lack of discipline, selfishness, and a host of other easy excuses.

Jesus never said it would be easy to follow Him.

Contraception is intrinsically evil. The contraception mentality makes abortion easier, makes divorce easier, makes children disposable. Our selfishness and our wants and our needs all come before God's when we say NO to life. In addition, contraception tells young people that sex is OK -- as long as you don't get pregnant! It makes PREGNANCY the illness, the CHILD a prison sentence, promiscuity acceptable, and marriage less important.

We need to pray and work in our parishes to teach about NFP and the evils of contraception in a loving way. If we judge and condemn, we may forever lose these souls, but if we offer love and compassion and show that NFP works, we will convert more hearts. Does anyone have success stories or ideas for our parishes to help promote NFP and the evils of contraception?

"Ultimately intimacy is trust, and in a truly selfless marriage there must be trust between husband, wife and God our Father. The Church teaches true intimacy in a marriage requires this radical three party trust. Wife must say to her husband, “Here is my body, my life. I give you and God my being; for if I conceive our children are forever.” Husbands must say to their wives, “I give you myself; I’ll always be here to care for you and our children—I’ll love you always.” Husbands and wives must say to God, “We trust You to care for us, to guard us, provide for us and our (Your) children and to lead us to You.” "

This is beautiful.

We have six couples scheduled for our NFP class this Saturday. Three of the six are referrals from one young, zealous, orthodox priest. When the priests preach on this issue, we get folks taking our classes. When they are silent our classes are empty.

First and foremost we need to get the priests and hierarchy to understand that preaching and teaching orthodox moral theology will not lose them parishioners but build up a parish.

I sometimes wonder that if priests were to put the sin in these rather blunt terms to their congregations, it might convict at least some of them of their transgression, but also throw light on the countless sacriligious communions that are being made every day.

It is important for the parish priest and the diocese to be clear about the church's teaching on contraception and abortion, and unfortunately most aren't. I call my parish "quietly pro-life". We have two collections a year for the local crisis pregnancy center (which the bishop is a big supporter of), and around the anniversary of Roe v. Wade and maybe 3-4 other times a year, we have a mention of the sanctity of human life from conception to natural death, but in the three years I have been a parishoner at this parish, we have never had an extensive homily on abortion, and no mention of contraception at all.

We did have one visiting priest who gave a beautiful homily and wove in the culture of death and the importance of our pro-life stance, etc., etc.

But what do you suggest we as lay people do? What can we do? Get involved with teaching NFP to the engagement classes? Make a stink in the diocese? Work on getting guest speakers for events?

I agree. But I think one of the reasons many Catholic couples are wary about NFP is because they think it doesn't work to prevent conception, that it's a game of russian roulette, and there ARE legitimate reasons for not getting pregnant. Solid instruction needs to help couples accept that children are a gift from God, but that it is OK to postpone or space children if their current situation is such-and-such. Especially if there is a major health risk to the mother, or if there are special needs children at home who would demand more attention, etc.

I am currently pregnant with my fourth child. Everything has worked according to plan and prayer, using NFP. I had two children 27 months apart; waited five years, and in April will have two children 2 years apart. I wanted the break primarily for financial reasons, but also so that I could spend a lot of time and energy on those two kids. They are now in school, and I can spend the same time and energy on these next two.

My husband doesn't want any more kids. It is a financial struggle, and four is a good number. I would be happy with any number of children, and maybe some day my husband will change his mind. But the wonderful thing about NFP is that the choice is still ours to make with God. We don't damage our relationship or our relationship with God because we ask Him that we not have any more children, and refrain from relations during my fertile time, because if He chooses us to bring forth another life, we are still open to it.

The problem, especially in this secular world, is that even now people thing four children are too many. They want two. Maybe three. Catholic families see those practicing NFP have four and five and six kids and they think NFP doesn't work. They don't realize that we have CHOOSEN to have four and five and six kids.

Anyway, that's my opinion. Some people really can't handle a lot of children, emotionally or financially, and it doesn't have to do with selfishness. Only God knows, and that's why He gave us this wonderful tool to help us understand and use our fertility in a loving and life-affirming way.

"Maybe it's just me and what I see, but the way things are "set up" now, this isn't happening. The people I know who are getting married don't approach it this way at all."

I fully agree with your observations - most people approaching the sacrament these days seem to have no or little idea what it is they are entering into.

If every bishop, priest and deacon would simply get behind the Holy Father, and actually preach and teach Catholic moral theology, then at least more of the lay faithful would know the theory. But in the fifteen years I've been a Catholic, I have NEVER ONCE heard contraception or abortion mentioned in a homily.

I wouldn't be surprised if the majority of the clergy held heretical views on contraception. The lecturer we have for moral theology is decidedly ambiguous on contraception and has "hinted" that if the teaching has not been "received" by the majority of the faithful, then the teaching must be wrong!

If most of the seminarians are dumb enough to follow this "logic", then you can see how the problem would be perpetuated.

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.