Good question, but I have another:
How do churches discern those who are Christians in name only ?
They don't look on the heart, but God does.
However, the local assembly leaders may have to evaluate whether a person behaves as though he/she is a CINO, and deal with it accordingly. That is what the Bible counsels the local assembly to do in applying church discipline.
Why do you need anyone to explain that to you, Els?
I am directing this to you, Els. Your unbelief is oozng out when you claim you can break God's Seal upon the spirit.
Fiathful is He that calleth you for He will also do it; many are called but few are chosen. Of the many called, why are so few chosen?... So few will let Him do it, They think they are always in danger of becoming unbelievers so they do not fully relent and let Him do the Saving to the uttermost.
Let go, Els, let God do what He has Promised to do for you. He wouldn't Promise if He leaves it up to you to maintain it, because He knows how weak/poor of spirit we are.