Discussion Ping. Any thoughts you would like to share?
I grieve my only son lost to me seven years ago. Grieving is not a formulaic thing to be mastered and overcome. It becomes part of who I am and who I will be — it is present always and each day offers up the gift of memory — some joyous and full of grace, some regretful and full of despair. It is Christ alone who accompanies me on this journey with grief, until that day (for which I pray) that I will be reunited with my son. Pax et bonum.
Since the sudden and unexpected death at Christmas of my beloved spouse of 40 years, I have had to come to grips with the fact that I am in control of very little. I have always tended to be somewhat of a control freak and was constantly full of plans and ways to control the outcome of life.
All those plans seemed so good that I was sure they had to be willed by God, well I guess they weren’t. Now I am being carried along in a rapid stream in a completely different direction and I just have to trust in the Lord, that He is in control. But even putting trust in the Lord isn’t all that easy and I have to ask Him for help everyday.
Grief doesn’t really lessen; it seems that the way you experience it just changes from day to day.
That is little comfort to those in the grips of deepest grief, but it may help us who are looking on or trying to help. And it also helps to remember that words are not always necessary. Pious platitudes can make grief more difficult, but by simply being present, we make Christ present also.
A devotion to Our Lady of Sorrows can also be of immense value in times of deep grief.