Posted on 12/01/2010 11:58:49 AM PST by Salvation
“There are few problems that cannot be solved by the suitable application of high explosives.”
Sometimes, old hurts come back during the holidays.
Contemplation and Prayer Ping!
I’ll opt for God’s healings — I doubt that it’s the explosive kind, though. Much more the gentle and slow kind of healing.
This is a tough one, especially where families are involved.
**This is a tough one, especially where families are involved.**
Absolutely. Another FReeper requested an article on this subject — so that’s why I am posting it.
Even in my own family, it applies. I keep praying and praying.
Outstanding article, Salvation! I was going to highlight a sentence or two that were my favorites (and comment), and then I realized I’d be highlighting the whole article. Very, very beautiful post. Does Fr. John contribute to the site often?
We must choose to forgive. It’s not something we “learn” to do or “process over time.”
Forgiveness is a choice and until we make that choice, healing does not begin.
Is it hard? You bet it is. But we are all sinful by our very nature, since our early ancestors got themselves kicked out of the Garden of Eden. But we must walk through our lives with the full realization that God is watching how we do things down here.
Ephesians 2:10 — For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
When forgiveness remains an obstacle to pass in order to get nearer to God’s comforting embrace, we need to remind ourselves that some people go all through their lives without ever having been challenged to choose to forgive someone.
I remember memorizing a poem when I was a little girl and it has helped enormously when I am confronted with people who need my best wishes, even forgiveness. It goes like this:
Heretic, rebel, a thing to flaut
(He) drew a circle that shut me out;
But love and I had the wit to win,
We drew a circle that took (him) in.
Insert other person’s name where the brackets are.
And in that spirit of love for someone is a prayer for that person’s well-being.
After all that, if forgiveness is still muddled in our own pain and suffering, then we need to bring that to God in prayer and ask for help in increasing our ability to make the choice to forgive.
— Jane Reinheimer
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Sorrow and confession.
You bring up a good point. Humor can lift emotional burdens and bring relief from bad memories.
Just for today, I’d rather hum “Grandma got run over by a reindeer” than brood about bad memories from Christmases past.
Resort to the high-explosive method sometimes creates more problems than it solves.
A certain wisdom is needed; prayer helps.
I’m a Christian, but some doctrines are difficult. I’ve always had a lot of difficulty with that “vengeance is mine, saith the Lord” thing.
That being said, I generally don’t take vengeance, but it takes me a while to get over the hurt, and even more to get over the fact that I didn’t even the score.
But eventually I do. that doesn’t, however, mean that I will ever accept that person as a friend again. does that mean I haven’t trulyl forgiven them?
If so, I’ll just have to answer to God. But if they want forgivenss from me, and I don’t think most snakes ever do, then they will have to find a way to make the past right.
God does not forgive sin without repentance and atonement. Does He require a different standard from us?
I’d like to hear some thoughts on this, because, as I said, I have a lot of difficulty with turning the other cheek, even though I generally do it.
You just need more practice, Chesley.:) The more you forgive, the easier it gets!
God bless you from the bottom of my heart for posting this. I am going to print it up and hang onto it. I have been having so many problems with my family. In simplest terms, nobody is a Christian in my family. My son has gone the way of his agnostic wife and is now questioning his faith (we brought him up in a strong Christian home). She was raised Roman Catholic but has turned her back on her faith.
There are no other believers on any side. It is very sad and increasingly, I am finding it very painful having to deal with people who are lost - deeply lost - in lifestyles of homosexuality and alcoholism, to name a few.
I have been praying for years. Oh well...
Well, I appreciate your humor.
Laughter is a gift from God.
: )
I’d like to hear some thoughts on this, because, as I said, I have a lot of difficulty with turning the other cheek, even though I generally do it.
Read Psalm 22. It’s all about Christ. Read Spurgeon’s commentary on the Psalm.
Treasury of David—Psalm 22
... Charles H. Spurgeon ... this particle of restraint, “his,” in “the presence of all his people,” is in Psalm 22:25 ...
www.spurgeon.org/treasury/ps022.htm
Think on a couple things.
1. The sinfulness of sin. As long as we make light of sin, and we can do that without realizing what we are doing, we will find it hard to forgive offences.
2. Contemplate this: What if any of us really got what we deserve?
“Let the words of my mouth, and the meditations of my heart be acceptable in Thy sight, my Rock, and my Redeemer.”
The Lord has given us the weapons, in His Word, for getting victory in these battles.
We don’t forget. The sting is removed. Memory makes us wise, and equips us to comfort others going through the same
struggles. No experience is ever wasted.
I am old. I learned these things in the trenches.
I always thought that God has asked us to repent and ask for forgiveness and that he is “faithful” to us. Meanwhile, though, there is the Lord’s prayer where we ask God to forgive us AS we forgive others.
I heard a good sermon the other day. Basically, it was that we are required to forgive but that true reconciliation cannot take place until the person who has inflicted the injury repents and asks for forgiveness.
I am struggling mightily with this myself. I have always been a very forgiving person but a couple of people in my husband’s family injured us in a most egregious manner. We are suffering financially and I am suffering emotionally. For some reason, it just took everything out of me, so I’m having all kinds of health problems.
It is hard to forgive when you are still enduring the suffering. I think it is easier to forgive when one is out of the situation. Also, I think people who say you must forgive often have no idea how hard it may be. I used to be one of those people, but now I realize that while I might say it, it would be so many words.
I just keep asking God to help me forgive and do it for me. I don’t think I can do it by myself.
Don’t know if I helped you at all but that’s my story.
Believe me, I’ve had plenty of practice. At least in getting over the pain.
don’t get me wrong, these have not been trivial offenses. I’m always eager to believe a little talking will clear up a misunderstanding. People can be selfish, thoughtless, oblivious, careless, even uncaring. I have no problem forgiving them, even forgetting the offense entirely.
I’m talking about acts motivated by a deep malice. Let me call it what it is, back-biting with severe and undeserved consequences.
Well, I’d say, just from experience, that even the ugliest of the ugly infractions need to be forgiven. I’ve got a sister ... well, I won’t go into it, but remember, the people that hurt you the most are the ones that are really hurting themselves. Forgive them in your heart if they don’t ask for it on their own (also I think Confession is really good in this regard) and then pray for them if you can ... that’s what I’ve done, and it’s taken a lot of pressure off of me and is no longer a distraction like it used to be, so I can live my life with more joy ...
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