Correct, you don't understand much about Baptists, and neither do most Baptists these days.
The designation "Baptist" is extremely limited, actually.
1. The Bible as the sole and final authority.
2. Each local church is autonomous and independent.
3. The priesthood of EVERY believer, not just a priest class.
4. Two ordinanaces (pictorial; not sacramental): water baptism and the Lord's Supper.
5. Individual soul liberty. Meaning, they don't burn you at the stake if you disagree with them.
6. Separation of church and state. EXCEPT that 90 percent plus Baptists in the USA today have surrendered this distinctive by becoming a STATE church through incorporation and 501(c)(3) registration.
7. Two local church offices: elder and deacon; the presiding elder being the pastor.
You see, these represent a very minor small amount of doctrine. Further, there are churches which hold exactly the same distinctives and would never call themselves "Baptist." Examples might be Bible Churches and Plymouth Brethren Assemblies.
Hence . . . .
There are Pentecostal Baptist and non-Pentecostal Baptists. There are Landmark Baptists and non-Landmark Baptists; Baptist Bride Baptists, and successionist Baptists, and then some Baptists who have some common sense about their history and heritage. There are Calvinistic Grace Baptists, Arminian Free Will Baptists, and anywhere in between Baptists. There are Seventh-Day Baptists, while most are First-Day Baptists. There are Amillennial Baptists, Postmillennial Baptists, and Premillennial Baptists. There are Pre-Tribulational Rapture Baptists, Mid-Tribulational Rapture Baptists, Pre-Wrath Rapture Baptists, and Post-Tribulational Rapture Baptists. There are dispensational Baptists and non-dispensational Baptists. There are King James Bible-believing Baptists and then there are "read anything that has the word "Bible" printed on the cover" Baptists. There are independent Baptists who would never join any kind of supra-church organization, and then there are Baptists who think they have to send money to a headquarters somewhere, shucking out the "autonomy" distinctive above. There are Baptists with women as pastors, and then there are Baptist who read their Bibles and believe God meant what He said. There are Holiness Baptists, and there are some very worldly Baptists.
"Baptist" is NOT the name of a denomination any more than saying "blue eyes" refers to a society. The word "Baptist" gives very little doctrinal information. If someone sees that word, "Baptist" on a sign out front of a building, he can have no way of knowing the details of that church's doctrine until he goes inside and asks the questions directly.
Most Baptist churches, NOR their pastors have any aspiration of controlling OTHER churches.
What’s that joke about 2 Baptists meeting up . . . going back and forth checking out credentials of belief . . . and finally there’s a tiny slight variation between them and the other bonks the 2nd as an infidel.
Too true.
However, if you want real spiritual help, as in prayer, I'm there for you.
If the measure of a Christian is other peoples' opinions, then something's wrong, and not with the reserved quiet ones. There's room for everybody in God's church and we have the right to worship as we see fit.