I saw a very good example of spiritual envy yesterday when watching “Song of Bernadette.”
When Bernadette entered the convent, there was the nun who had disbelieved her as a child. She was the novice mistress and did everything possible to “correct” what she saw as Bernadette’s pride, even going so far as to insist that she change her name when entering the convent. When Bernadette started limping, Sr. went to her cell to berate her for “drawing attention to herself.” She then went into a tirade saying that she just could not believe that Bernadette had been favored with the grace to see Our Lady when she had never suffered. Sr. pointed out all the suffering that she herself had endured over the years and just couldn’t understand why Bernadette had been chosen and she had not. Bernadette couldn’t answer her. Finally, as if a light dawned on her she said, “Maybe this will help you” and lifted up the hem of her habit. Sr. was absolutely horrified at what she saw. When the doctor came, he gave a diagnosis of cancer of the knee and tuberculosis of the leg. He asked if Bernadette had ever complained and Mother said, “no.” The doctor couldn’t believe it and commented on the intense pain that this type of illness caused. Then Sr. ran to the chapel and shouted to God over and over how sorry she was and she pledged that she would spend the rest of whatever time Bernadette had left in serving her and doing whatever she could for her.
That is a very good example. I don’t remember that part since I was a child when I saw it.