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Sorry if this has been posted before.
1 posted on 05/04/2009 7:20:02 PM PDT by markomalley
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To: markomalley

Q: Why does a Catholic arrive at Mass early?
A: So he/she can sit in the last pew.

;-o)


2 posted on 05/04/2009 7:26:08 PM PDT by Frank Sheed (Fr. V. R. Capodanno, Lt, USN, Catholic Chaplain. 3rd/5th, 1st Marine Div., FMF. MOH, posthumously.)
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To: markomalley

LOL. I am not Catholic but I did attend Catholic school as a child.

And many of these code words apply to any number of churches I have attended.


3 posted on 05/04/2009 7:27:14 PM PDT by reaganaut (Ex-Mormon, now Christian "I once was lost, but now am found; was blind but now I see")
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To: markomalley

Psssst...just between you and me, we Protestants share a lot of the same code words. : )


4 posted on 05/04/2009 7:32:10 PM PDT by skr (May God confound the enemy)
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To: markomalley
INCENSE: Holy Smoke!

Like that one. Seen it before, but still like it.

6 posted on 05/04/2009 7:37:08 PM PDT by Tanniker Smith (The sun glinted off chiseled pectorals sculpted during four weight-lifting sessions each week and...)
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To: markomalley

All true ;-)


8 posted on 05/04/2009 7:50:55 PM PDT by buccaneer81 (Bob Taft has soiled the family name for the next century.)
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To: markomalley

Back in the day, they also used secret Latin code words and phrases; eg: Domine go frisk ‘em ! Benny’s got the dominos,etc.


9 posted on 05/04/2009 8:10:44 PM PDT by mrmeangenes
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To: markomalley

You forgot the priest that cooks the meals on Friday. He’s the Fish Friar,


11 posted on 05/05/2009 4:37:06 AM PDT by Mr Inviso (ACORN=Arrogant Condescending Obama Ruining Nation)
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To: markomalley

CHOIR: A group of people whose singing allows the rest of the Parish to lip-sync.

* Singing? I always wondered what that caterwauling was.*

HYMN: A song of praise usually sung in a key three octaves higher than that of the congregation’s range.

* I remember hymns. They’ve long since been replaced by caterwauling *

JESUITS: An order of priests known for their ability to find colleges with good basketball teams.

* When first meeting a Jesuit, always ask, “Are you a good Jesuit, or a bad Jesuit?” *

JUSTICE: When kids have kids of their own.

* Justice is now defined as open borders and socialism. *


12 posted on 05/05/2009 10:03:47 AM PDT by Jeff Chandler ("Mr. President, I support you but not your mission. I'm showing my patriotism through dissent.")
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