You said: I know many Catholics who do NOT have the Holy Spirit. What about them?
How do you know they don’t? Are you God? It is a VERY serious matter to set oneself up as the judge of state of another person’s soul. Reprimanding behavior is one thing. Judging the state of another’s soul should be left to Jesus.
If joy, etc. is a sign of being filled with the HS, many Catholics AND other Christians fail the test. Many just go around with sour pickle faces, always negative, never happy. I doubt if they are filled with the HS. You have to be a Christian to have the HS, and you can ask for it if you want it. Not so hard.
Like one of our posters is fond of saying, “You shall know them by their fruits.”