Posted on 02/03/2008 5:18:13 PM PST by Alex Murphy
ALBANY, Ga. The Harrelsens are faithful members of First Assembly of God.
And West Avenue Baptist.
And Sycamore Nazarene Church. And three other congregations in town.
The family has changed churches six times in the last eight years, but is so afraid of offending each pastor that they have never officially left any of them. Today they follow an amazing schedule of church attendance to maintain the fiction that they still belong to all six congregations.
"The question for us is, whats the minimum we need to do to appear that we are still actively engaged?" says Molly Harrelsen, the mother. "Its a brain-bender."
The family spends 38 hours a week at various church activities. Wednesday evenings are spent at the Assembly of God churchs mid-week Bible study; Thursday its Awana at the Baptist church; Friday morning is an early morning mens accountability group meeting elsewhere, and Saturday is a womens Bible study across town. Sunday morning involves driving to three different churches before noon and trying to appear fresh at each one.
"You get dizzy," says father Barry Harrelsen. "Ive learned to zone out."
There are mix-ups. One time Molly was scheduled to work in the nursery at two different churches on Sunday, one after the other. In her haste, she forgot to take off her badge and smock from the previous church.
"People looked at me funny, but I dont think they figured it out," she says.
The Harrelsens 4-year-old daughter has developed calluses from doing so many crafts each week. But she firmly believes that everyone attends six churches. The familys car is swimming in church bulletins and Sunday school hand-outs.
Their teenage son is annoyed at having to attend six churches, but sees some upsides.
"I meet more girls, but I have a hard time remembering their names," he says.
Yes, but do they tithe at each church?
Sounds like something Ned Flanders would do.
These people are idiots.
Lark News —> it’s a joke (but one of those that’s so close to reality you just have to wonder.)
Well, they got me.
You are correct.
I know people who might fit the story’s outline.
The teenaged son has the most sensible attitude in this story.
In some ways I can understand this. It used to be that when a person visited a church that the church people would notice that “hey that guy isn’t a regular here” and they’d shake his hand and say hello and welcome him and might recommend a sunday school class. Nowadays it seems that it is the visitors job to impose himself on the regulars at the church and sometimes it can be hard to impossible to find a place where you can fit in.
Hey once we got you we never let you go!
This is like the Wittenburg Door, if they’re still around!
Ed
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