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No two EFCs are alike, so it’s important to check them out. Most that I saw tend to be Bible Churches, with heavy focus on scripture during the sermon. Right now we’re in a series of sermons going through the second half of Romans (the first part was covered previously). Really intense, and they work in how it ties to the Gospels and OT. I actually learn a lot during the sermons.

On the sins, my specific feelings were that I can’t differentiate my “lifestyle” sin from homosexuality. I have twice in my life been suicidal, and struggle mightily with depression. I can’t say that’s any less of a sin. At some levels I believe it to be a worse sin. I acknowledge it as such and do my best to transform my life away from it and closer to what God wants me to be.

I really enjoy talking with you on this.

Here’s the link to the church I’m joining: http://www.ccefc.org/s/index.cfm?SSID=26

That shows all the different sermon subjects and speakers, and if you click on them, you can get the downloadable audio.

I suppose there were some scripture readings way back, it's all a blur now, and many catholic homilies tied in with the scripture readings, but there was little continuity (I'm talking about my experience only).

Some of those audios look interesting, especially the supernatural one, thank you, I bookmarked them.

We have more in common than I thought as I've suffered like you for years. It does tend to color our perceptions and makes conflicts worse. I noticed that some of the things related to church, conflicting teachings, hypocrisy, unfairness, confusion, etc., bothered me less when I was not so depressed. When I wasn't depressed, I had more going in my life and tended to blow off or rationalize the things that normal churchgoers don't worry about which I did because I took it so seriously, not to say that others didn't. Much of it was for the social aspect, habitual, routine, just a way of life.

So often I went into church feeling bad and came out feeling worse, that shouldn't be, and most of it had to be me, but there are still conflicts I doubt I'll ever get resolved and have learned to live with it. I almost lost my faith altogether. Now some of it is starting to be rekindled, and I still pray but not like I used to. I can't say I don't need church, that would be unscriptural.