Some of those audios look interesting, especially the supernatural one, thank you, I bookmarked them.
We have more in common than I thought as I've suffered like you for years. It does tend to color our perceptions and makes conflicts worse. I noticed that some of the things related to church, conflicting teachings, hypocrisy, unfairness, confusion, etc., bothered me less when I was not so depressed. When I wasn't depressed, I had more going in my life and tended to blow off or rationalize the things that normal churchgoers don't worry about which I did because I took it so seriously, not to say that others didn't. Much of it was for the social aspect, habitual, routine, just a way of life.
So often I went into church feeling bad and came out feeling worse, that shouldn't be, and most of it had to be me, but there are still conflicts I doubt I'll ever get resolved and have learned to live with it. I almost lost my faith altogether. Now some of it is starting to be rekindled, and I still pray but not like I used to. I can't say I don't need church, that would be unscriptural.
Supernatural is the one we’re currently going through, and is pretty good. I walk out of sermon with a page full of notes.
There are some good ones sprinkled throughout. The head pastor does a good job of describing both sides of conflicting Christian positions (e.g. pacifism vs. just war theory) but also makes clear his own understanding. He certainly doesn’t shy away from anything.
I love the podcasts, they make great audio for the morning commute. That and Ravi Zacharias podcasts, great stuff there.